you are stuck with me today.

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jacksonb

and will have to endure.
i have a hot and cold sweats and the galloping nasties, so i shall be here allllllll day posting stuff and reading stuff.'cept when the gallops have to be done, that is.
so bravehearts, come and have a chat or possibly a laugh .

than you in advance.

Replies sorted oldest to newest

MysTerryMember

Do we have to wear a face mask

9/20/094:38 AM

jacksonbMember

oh yes and wear surgical gloves.

9/20/094:39 AM

jacksonbMember

now i will whine about adverts on my telly box.

so i am sitting all comfy watching a film all snuggled with o.h, and then the adverts come on. booming out, sound level through the roof , i practically shit myself and o.h. screams.

wtf is that all about?

9/20/094:41 AM

Karma_Member

OMG can I catch this over the net? Everyone's catching everything these days

*goes off to get vaccinated first*

9/20/094:42 AM

jacksonbMember

worst advert today has to be ' i want to poo in pauls bathroom'

oh nice, go over to your mate's house and shit in it. this has to be the most unintantionally aversive bit of advertising ever. no one is going to buy this air freshener if it encourages all the neighbourhood scroats to come over and crap in your house.

9/20/094:46 AM

MysTerryMember

Reference: jacksonb

oh yes and wear surgical gloves.

can I also wear an apron... with a little watch pinned on it..

9/20/094:47 AM

jacksonbMember

an upside down watch?

9/20/094:49 AM

MysTerryMember

Reference:

an upside down watch?

I've always wanted one of those...

9/20/094:55 AM

jacksonbMember

and why , may i ask, is fiona phillips often asked "These days, whether cheaper anti-ageing products are a smart way to save money".
and why, Fiona? do people see fit to ask you this rather obscure question these days
is it because leaving the GMTV sofa makes you a qualified dermatologist?
in any case , i for one don't care what you are asked these days or any other sort of days , for that matter.

9/20/094:58 AM

jacksonbMember

Reference:

I've always wanted one of those..

will you be squeezing my wrist at fairly regular intervals and at the same time looking at your watch?

9/20/095:00 AM

Karma_Member

Reference: jacksonb

worst advert today has to be ' i want to poo in pauls bathroom'

I bloody HATE that advert

9/20/095:03 AM

jacksonbMember

pompous little brat needs a smack round the chops , if you ask me.

9/20/095:06 AM

hyperstarMember

*relax*

9/20/095:09 AM

jacksonbMember

i thin 'relaxed' in my current condition is not good advice......

9/20/095:11 AM

hyperstarMember

Reference:

i thin 'relaxed' in my current condition is not good advice

How about a cup of tea

9/20/095:13 AM

jacksonbMember

oddly nuff i just made one.

9/20/095:14 AM

Dame_Ann_AverageMember VIP10 years

If it's catching, I'll just stand at the door and

9/20/095:25 AM

jacksonbMember

i'm all hot now.

a precursor to an imminent gallop i fear....

9/20/095:28 AM

jacksonbMember

love your av dame anne.

9/20/095:28 AM

Dame_Ann_AverageMember VIP10 years

Reference:

love your av dame anne.

cool innit, it was between that and a faling down giraffe....the super penguin won

9/20/095:30 AM

MysTerryMember

Reference:

will you be squeezing my wrist at fairly regular intervals and at the same time looking at your watch?

and sticking one of those thingies in your mouth...to test if you are feeling hot

9/20/095:31 AM

DirtyprettygirlthingMember

Two words....

IMMODIUM INSTANTS!

they are magical miracle working thingys..... they disappear on your tongue... and stodge up your innards almost straight away!!!

9/20/095:46 AM

Former Member

Digs out solid gold upside down watch, and thermometer with blue blob!

9/20/095:49 AM

jacksonbMember

my mumlalways told me it was best to go forth and squit as that evacuates the buggery bug from yer innards.

9/20/095:50 AM

DirtyprettygirlthingMember

lol at Tiddles' nurse hat (scary old ward that one then!)

Jackson - if whatever it was, was that bad... you'd have puked it up! And as you sound as though you have had a few lower end purges already.... take the Immodium, before you get nappy rash

9/20/095:58 AM

Former Member

I tried to come in earlier with some spirigel to leave at the door for peeps to use coming in and out of this fred but my pooter is playing up

Hope you feel better soon Jackson

I've got to go back to my maths homework

9/20/096:01 AM

jacksonbMember

Reference:

Jackson - if whatever it was, was that bad... you'd have puked it up! And as you sound as though you have had a few lower end purges already.... take the Immodium, before you get nappy rash

oddly nuff i am housetrained and haven't soiled me undercrackers for several years.....

leaving out the unfortunate incident in amsterdam.

9/20/096:01 AM

$fracas$ fracasMember

Hope your arse gets better soon Jackson. I have been under the weather the last couple of days and the shop has run out of bogger, so I've scratched me ring raw wi'kitchen roll

$fracas$

9/20/096:17 AM

jacksonbMember

ouch.

are you hobbling or walking like you couldn't stop a pig in an alley?

9/20/096:20 AM

DirtyprettygirlthingMember

Reference: Fracas

scratched me ring raw wi'kitchen roll

I am not laughing at your discomfort Fracas.... just your turn of phrase!

(Kitchen roll should really stay in the kitchen... I tried to use it instead of tissues to blow my nose last week.... I looked like rudolph for days after)

9/20/096:34 AM

$fracas$ fracasMember

Reference:

ouch. are you hobbling or walking like you couldn't stop a pig in an alley?

Just clenching everything at the moment. What I wouldn't give for a wet wipe

$fracas$

9/20/096:34 AM

PussMember

I wish my lot would feck off to Pauls house

Good afternoon (puts on me Nadine Maggot face)

she apparently was called that at school AhAhAhAhhhhhaaa

Did you know that Cheryl Cole NEVER has to brush her own hair

9/20/096:36 AM

MysTerryMember

Reference: pussycatj

Did you know that Cheryl Cole NEVER has to brush her own hair

You're kidding

does she have to wait for the hairdresser to arrive in the morning ?

9/20/096:39 AM

$fracas$ fracasMember

Reference:

(Kitchen roll should really stay in the kitchen... I tried to use it instead of tissues to blow my nose last week.... I looked like rudolph for days after)

It's either that or a copy of Total Guitar, but it's a bit too glossy. My poor old arse stings so!

$fracas$

9/20/096:39 AM

KayteeMember 10 years

*Puts on face mask and wipes hands with anti-bac*

*throws in a couple of rolls of Andrex and waves from the door*

9/20/096:44 AM

KayteeMember 10 years

*Puts on face mask and wipes hands with anti-bac*

*throws in a couple of rolls of Andrex and waves from the door*

9/20/096:42 AM

KayteeMember 10 years

*Puts on face mask and wipes hands with anti-bac*

*throws in a couple of rolls of Andrex and waves from the door*

9/20/096:42 AM

KayteeMember 10 years

*Puts on face mask and wipes hands with anti-bac*

*throws in a couple of rolls of Andrex and waves from the door*

9/20/096:42 AM

DirtyprettygirlthingMember

Reference: Fracas

It's either that or a copy of Total Guitar, but it's a bit too glossy. My poor old arse stings so!

<---- Germaline (the one with the anaesthetic in it) & a magic super soft dabbing tool!)

9/20/097:08 AM

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