That explains the mess in here..

Thank you everyone
Ditty- no she was just being a typical mother I think, he's only known this woman for 10 weeks
Jen- because she can't afford to pay the mortgage by herself and me and my brother are currently in no state to help her out with it, so once he announced he didn't know when he was leaving she felt she couldn't kick him out as she needs to sort out an agreement with him about it.

Although I have to say what is annoying me the most is that she has told me and my brother that we have to keep quiet about it and that we are to act normally til he leaves and then she makes a huge fuss if we so much as answer a question from him...
anyways happy thoughts to everyone

oh Trix...is this the same woman he was emailing or something?  You had your suspicions a while ago didn't you?

I'd say your poor mum's head is all over the place, so I'd expect a bit of erratic behaviour.  As for whether she can afford the mortgage or not, that's beside the point, kick the sod out!  I can't believe he's got the nerve to stay!  Sorry...I know it's your dad and all, but jees

Your mum is putting it on you a bit, in my opinion...  I;ve been there... I have been completely devastated and all over the place...  but the one thing I managed to hold on to was to do everything in my power to minimise the impact, disruption and involvement of the kids.

You should do what YOU feel is right xxx and if you want to talk to your father then you should...  she really shouldn't be asking you not to speak to him xxxx  (and again... I've been in her  shoes... and though I may feel that I would like the kids to spit on the ex the moment they see him... I don't have the right to request them to do that)

Trixy
I read back to see what this is about and all I can say is, it must be the worst time ever for you right now, but believe it or not, it WILL pass and things will get better. Your mum sounds like she's in a right state, but I agree with everyone else that it's not your job to put her straight.
And forget about her wanting to keep up appearances for your dad until he goes - kick his arse out, now!

Trix, sounds tough mate. Keep your chin up maybe go out with a few mates to take your mind of it all hun. Nothing much you can do apart from listen to your mum unload (unless she has a close friend she can talk to instead?)

No matter how much you keep quiet about it your dads bound to feel the atmosphere and know your mums told you both, theres no way of masking it. Still think she should kick his arse out.... money matters can be sorted at a later date, you all shouldnt be put through this let alone at christmas Really feel for you Trix xx