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FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Aimee:
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Aimee:

I love my neighbour dearly, she's getting on now and lost her husband a couple of years ago, i look out for her and always ask if she needs any shopping getting in etc BUT she has a son that comes too see her daily (too beg off her) and he brings his dog, she has a dog also and the 2 dogs don't get on so she puts her dog upstairs in the bedroom next too mine and it whines for hours  no afternnon sunday naps in this house  i have drop it into conversations and she does apologise but it still happens EVERY day

Just tell her Aims. Say ere missis! your bloody dog just makes too much noise!...........she'll get the message 

i've told her and now she informs me when she's going out, so i can get prepared for the noise  the sound is sooooooo iritating  i'm shouting shut the f-ck up and my daughters shouting at me too shut the f-ck up

LOL!! do you two make more noise than the dog? 

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
AimeeAimeeMember
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Aimee:
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Aimee:

I love my neighbour dearly, she's getting on now and lost her husband a couple of years ago, i look out for her and always ask if she needs any shopping getting in etc BUT she has a son that comes too see her daily (too beg off her) and he brings his dog, she has a dog also and the 2 dogs don't get on so she puts her dog upstairs in the bedroom next too mine and it whines for hours  no afternnon sunday naps in this house  i have drop it into conversations and she does apologise but it still happens EVERY day

Just tell her Aims. Say ere missis! your bloody dog just makes too much noise!...........she'll get the message 

i've told her and now she informs me when she's going out, so i can get prepared for the noise  the sound is sooooooo iritating  i'm shouting shut the f-ck up and my daughters shouting at me too shut the f-ck up

LOL!! do you two make more noise than the dog? 

she say's she never hears us

Aimee
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Member

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."


Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
BazBazMember VIP10 years
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

Baz
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

Painfull 

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Member
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

Painfull 

going off topic, but from the same page as those letters, and they are all genuine 

 

A letter to the council

 

"Will you please send someone to mend the garden path? My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant."

 

 

Kitchen furniture problems:
"I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers."

Repairs needed:
Send a man round with a big tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

"I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction."

Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Drama:
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

Painfull 

going off topic, but from the same page as those letters, and they are all genuine 

 

A letter to the council

 

"Will you please send someone to mend the garden path? My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant."

 

 

Kitchen furniture problems:
"I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers."

Repairs needed:
Send a man round with a big tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

"I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction."

That puts me in mind of something said at work today re pregnancy. She rolled over on to the wet patch.  I'll get my coat    

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
stonksstonksMember
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

My cock bangs on my dads bedroom window and wakes him up with his cock a doodle dooing....

stonks
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Baz:
Originally Posted by erinp:

When I worked in the DSS I got a letter,I was working in grants dept.

They asked for help to buy a three piece suit ,as they were sitting on their cousins.

 

They meant a three piece suite as they were sitting on cushions.

 I bet you creased up Erinp

might have

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Miss S:
Originally Posted by sproooot:

I'm frightened to Erin. Allthough it might take Extraterrestrial out of my head 


Hate that song - now I have that in my head!

 

I might have to click on Erin's song now too

It's every time I go in the back room at work, the bloody thing's on! and actually I didn't mind it the first few times I heard it 

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)Member
Originally Posted by stonks:
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

My cock bangs on my dads bedroom window and wakes him up with his cock a doodle dooing....

 

Funny Toilet Humour Letters 

Extracts from letters sent to a council housing office - Part 2

"I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them away."

"My lavatory seat is cracked - where do I stand?"

"The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared."

"Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces."

"This is to let you know that our toilet seat is broken and we can't get BBC2 television programs."
Jemima Puddleduck (fka Drama)
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by stonks:
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

My cock bangs on my dads bedroom window and wakes him up with his cock a doodle dooing....

How high are the windows in your house? 

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
SydSydMember 10 years
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Syd:
Originally Posted by sproooot:

Should we put our headphones on Syd? 

Read down and saw your fear too sproooot...........I'm not wired for sound I'm afraid......you listen and report back.....

Oh maaaaaaaaaan! you want me to listen! 

Well yes sprooot...one of us has to, and me neighbours are sensitive souls, I would'nt want to upset them.

Syd
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
FM Former Member
Originally Posted by Syd:
Originally Posted by sproooot:
Originally Posted by Syd:
Originally Posted by sproooot:

Should we put our headphones on Syd? 

Read down and saw your fear too sproooot...........I'm not wired for sound I'm afraid......you listen and report back.....

Oh maaaaaaaaaan! you want me to listen! 

Well yes sprooot...one of us has to, and me neighbours are sensitive souls, I would'nt want to upset them.

Go on Syd. Have a listen. Its really not that bad 

FM
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
SharSharMember
Originally Posted by stonks:
Originally Posted by Drama:

Some letters sent into police about noisy neighbours

 

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs apartment and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night."

 

... and their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me."

 

My cock bangs on my dads bedroom window and wakes him up with his cock a doodle dooing....

Shar
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ðŸ’ŊâĪïļðŸ˜‚🎉🙏ðŸĪ”😀ðŸ˜đ👍👎☝ïļðŸ‘ðŸ˜ŧ👀ðŸ‘ŋðŸ˜ĒðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ✅🙄ðŸĪ·ðŸ”Ĩ🏆📈ðŸĪŊ
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