quote:

Originally posted by Shiver:

quote:

Originally posted by JacksonB:

quote:

Originally posted by lucifer:
I've always mused about willy size. Men always seem to know their 'ultimate' size in inches, and I'm utterly at a loss to know how they measure it.

Don't get me wrong..I was spewed forth into this void as a bloke, and possess one of those dangly bits. But when it 'lives up to expectations' I just have no eye for detail.

What do you do..?? Buy one of those rulers you used in Maths as a kid and hold it alongside..?

I played with the idea of a tape measure, but the recoil on those things is simply too hazardous to seriously contemplate. I'd sooner use a bread knife alongside it for reasons of cowardice; but then I dunno how long a flippin' breadknife is

Kind women say size doesn't matter. Explains why I always buy cutlery for girlfriends

no, no, no, no, you drag your scrotum down as far as you can measure from the underside with the measuring stick jammed into your groin as far as it will go, do people know nothing!

tsk!

ouchouchouch

quote:

Originally posted by Betty Swallox:

quote:

Originally posted by Shiver:

quote:

Originally posted by JacksonB:

quote:

Originally posted by lucifer:
I've always mused about willy size. Men always seem to know their 'ultimate' size in inches, and I'm utterly at a loss to know how they measure it.

Don't get me wrong..I was spewed forth into this void as a bloke, and possess one of those dangly bits. But when it 'lives up to expectations' I just have no eye for detail.

What do you do..?? Buy one of those rulers you used in Maths as a kid and hold it alongside..?

I played with the idea of a tape measure, but the recoil on those things is simply too hazardous to seriously contemplate. I'd sooner use a bread knife alongside it for reasons of cowardice; but then I dunno how long a flippin' breadknife is

Kind women say size doesn't matter. Explains why I always buy cutlery for girlfriends

no, no, no, no, you drag your scrotum down as far as you can measure from the underside with the measuring stick jammed into your groin as far as it will go, do people know nothing!

tsk!

ouchouchouch

theres nothing ouch about having your scrotum pulled down, infact the total opposite is true.

quote:

Originally posted by Shiver:

quote:

Originally posted by Betty Swallox:

quote:

Originally posted by Shiver:

quote:

Originally posted by JacksonB:

quote:

Originally posted by lucifer:
I've always mused about willy size. Men always seem to know their 'ultimate' size in inches, and I'm utterly at a loss to know how they measure it.

Don't get me wrong..I was spewed forth into this void as a bloke, and possess one of those dangly bits. But when it 'lives up to expectations' I just have no eye for detail.

What do you do..?? Buy one of those rulers you used in Maths as a kid and hold it alongside..?

I played with the idea of a tape measure, but the recoil on those things is simply too hazardous to seriously contemplate. I'd sooner use a bread knife alongside it for reasons of cowardice; but then I dunno how long a flippin' breadknife is

Kind women say size doesn't matter. Explains why I always buy cutlery for girlfriends

no, no, no, no, you drag your scrotum down as far as you can measure from the underside with the measuring stick jammed into your groin as far as it will go, do people know nothing!

tsk!

ouchouchouch

theres nothing ouch about having your scrotum pulled down, infact the total opposite is true.

I know that but...

you wouldnt ouch with a stick jammed in your groin then?

lies!111

quote:

Originally posted by Shiver:
A splint?

I aint even asking

quote:

Originally posted by langster:
OH FGS!!!!!

We have been here before lol! penis size is irrellevant, but the fact I have a 6 inch tongue and can breath through my ears does wonders for my reputation

quote:

Originally posted by lucifer:
I've read all the advice and I'm learning.

Tried dragging my scrotum down as far as possible. Problem is, I was screaming so loud, I thought it was someone else and near called the cops.

Anyways, my scrotum was on the lino, I was in shock, my ruler was up my left nostril, my penis had evaporated and I would have 'hazarded' a guess to free myself from the agony, were it not for the fact my cerebrum was behind my elbow by this stage...

Flippin' tragic story I know....

quote:

Originally posted by Betty Swallox:

quote:

Originally posted by lucifer:
I've read all the advice and I'm learning.

Tried dragging my scrotum down as far as possible. Problem is, I was screaming so loud, I thought it was someone else and near called the cops.

Anyways, my scrotum was on the lino, I was in shock, my ruler was up my left nostril, my penis had evaporated and I would have 'hazarded' a guess to free myself from the agony, were it not for the fact my cerebrum was behind my elbow by this stage...

Flippin' tragic story I know....

are you david carradine ?

quote:

What good is a willy the size of a Bolivia when you're 80 anyways..?

quote:

Originally posted by langster:

quote:

What good is a willy the size of a Bolivia when you're 80 anyways..?

You could always use it as a belt and wrap it around your trousers when the elastic goes

quote:

Originally posted by Betty Swallox:
A penis extension is much needed for becoming elderly, have you seen how big ya nuts get, you need something that doesn't look like a wallnut whip.

quote:

Originally posted by Suzi-Q:
Why didn't he do what Ziggy did and stuff a sock in his pants?

quote:

Originally posted by langster:
OH FGS!!!!!

We have been here before lol! penis size is irrellevant, but the fact I have a 6 inch tongue and can breath through my ears does wonders for my reputation

quote:

Originally posted by Penelope Pitstop:

quote:

Originally posted by langster:
OH FGS!!!!!

We have been here before lol! penis size is irrellevant, but the fact I have a 6 inch tongue and can breath through my ears does wonders for my reputation

I think I love you.

quote:

Originally posted by Veggieburger:

quote:

Originally posted by Penelope Pitstop:

quote:

Originally posted by langster:
OH FGS!!!!!

We have been here before lol! penis size is irrellevant, but the fact I have a 6 inch tongue and can breath through my ears does wonders for my reputation

I think I love you.

Get in the queue Ms Pitstop

*goes off to give Dick Dastardly a call*

quote:

Originally posted by queenshaks:
Are you our Lucifer from C4?????

quote:

Originally posted by kimota:
Narinder from BB2 just said on BBLB that she wanted Kris out cos he has a tiny cock (lol)She won't be asked back again!

quote:

Originally posted by wandawitch:

quote:

Originally posted by kimota:
Narinder from BB2 just said on BBLB that she wanted Kris out cos he has a tiny cock (lol)She won't be asked back again!

Did she really say that?

quote:

Originally posted by kimota:

quote:

Originally posted by wandawitch:

quote:

Originally posted by kimota:
Narinder from BB2 just said on BBLB that she wanted Kris out cos he has a tiny cock (lol)She won't be asked back again!

Did she really say that?

I cant remember if she used that exact word, but her meaning was clear!

quote:

Originally posted by Veggieburger:

quote:

Originally posted by Penelope Pitstop:

quote:

Originally posted by langster:
OH FGS!!!!!

We have been here before lol! penis size is irrellevant, but the fact I have a 6 inch tongue and can breath through my ears does wonders for my reputation

I think I love you.

Get in the queue Ms Pitstop

*goes off to give Dick Dastardly a call*