I recall posting a theoretical thread back in the CH4 days regarding what to do when encountering a Bear in theRockies(or any similar location). Some of the responses were fascinating – such as standing in a star position to make your self look bigger and possibly scare the Bear away!

tickle it under it's chinny chin chin 

Honestly?  I'd probably freeze, or my legs would give way, and I'd either poop my pants or die of a heartattack before the thing even got near me.

I guess i wud most probably deficate all over the place.

Which wud probably stop sed lion wanting to eat me!!

Maybe i watched Tarzan too much as a kid!

What would you do if you spotted a Lion?

Just disguised it as a leopard??

I'd fetch me chair and whip....

Run

No!

Just assume it's angry enough already without attempting to apply any body art.

In that case I would jump on it's back and ride it back to Narnia. 

I'd stick my hand up its backside and audition for BGT 

I'd remove the thorn sticking out of its paw. It would then cease to be angry and would not harm me.

I would probably just freeze, and stare at it for a while.....I adore cats, even big ones.

If it was angry, I'd back away slowly and snap a couple of pics on my phone before calling 999, and sell them for some cash if I survived

Look for D. Gale, The Tinman and all...

I would make damn sure it was lion before running away and shouting "it's a f***ing lion"!  

even if I'd made damned sure & was positive it was a lion (taken blood samples, confirmed DNA etc)..  

I would still saunter off casually, maybe mentioning apologetically to anyone walking towards me that it might be best not to as there appeared to be a lion down there 

It takes more than a lion for me to make a spectacle of meself 

and I'd be checking before I rammed me arm up its ass 

I do think that's wise Dame  

I was thinking Lenny the Lion and a total rethink of my later years...maybe not eh? 

I have spent way too long trying to work out why Dame goes around shoving her arm up lions arses 

I'd tell it to "shut up" if it was from Essex.  Sorry, couldn't resist that tired old joke, yet again.

If it was really from Essex, I might mistake it for a leopard, as it might be wearing a leopard skin outfit.

There's a donkey there too? 

My (long dead) grandad used to tell us a story about when he was a soldier in the jungle and he was in a stand-off with a tiger. The tiger roared at him and, quick as a flash my brave grandad put his hand right down into the tiger's mouth and grabbed hold of it's tail and pulled it inside-out.

I guess I'd do the same

I saw the picture that bloke took of the "Lion" in the paper, it was a bloody big ginger tom cat.

I agree katty, although I did have the back door open this afternoon and I heard a rustling in the garden. I closed the door, just incase

And I live a jolly long way away from Essex