People who use Parent and Child parking spaces and they are on their own!!!!!

Sorry erin, we used to use them when we were with our dad. I remember one 'lady' giving out to us and my sister replying. 'He's the parent I'm the child'

ooh I know of someone who has that same rant, but about the Disabled spaces!

DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THAT!!

Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.

By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to  honor it.  I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight  years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for  the inconvenience caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has  caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the  impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no  longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check,addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must  nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much  about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be  accompanied by documented proof. In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access  my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Let me level the playing field even further.  When you call me, press buttons as follows:

IMMEDIATELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

#1. To make an appointment to see me.

#2. To query a missing payment.

#3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.

#4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping

#5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.

#6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.

#7. To leave a message on my computer.  A password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later  date to that Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.

#8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.

#9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.

#10. This is a second reminder to press* for English. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for  the duration of the call.

Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. May I  wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

Your Humble Client

OHHHH where to start...
The TV licence
Pro Life people
People selling me religion at my door
People ambushing me with direct debit forms to save the panda and such like as i attempt to walk down the high street
Menus....every day menus through the door
the 'CAR WASH' people who accost me as soon as i park in tesco...NO!! If id wanted a car wash, funnily enough i would have gone to a car wash...no today im just all about the milk and a fecking loaf of bread
Catherine zeta jones
...
thats just a start

I have so many things that set me off. My hero is Victor Meldrew.

Yeah, like Tom Selleck - I remember  

I Don't believe it!!

This place has some right miserable gits!



I mean, saving Pandas is kinda nice!

I`m glad you posted this thread monobrow because I want to rant!
I`m not a ranter but this made me annoyed... 
Went into my local Spar today and the bank/cash machine was playing up. Rejecting my card with messages.. your account is invalid...we cannot access your account etc. The screen was flickering like it was about to crash but after a few tries.. it worked.
Approached the man behind the counter  
Convo goes like this...

Me: There`s a problem with the cash machine
Man: Nothing to do with us. We don`t own it.
Me: I know you don`t own it but I`d like to report the problem.
Man: Nothing to do this us.
Me: Who do I report it to then?
Man: I don`t know but it`s got nothing to do with us.
Me: But it`s inside your shop..who else can I report it to?
Man: Don`t know but it`s got nothing to do with us. 
Me: Do I have to report the faulty machine that`s in your shop to the Clydesdale bank then?
Man: That`s up to you. It`s got nothing to do with us.

There's only one thing that makes me rant and thats VAT, even the mention of the word and I go off into one....

Pops in just to give erinp a .....and a

Bloody council tax
the Inland Revenue
Sky high parking charges at the local hospital
Indian call centres

Ooh, that ticks me off too! Our hospital is £2 an hour or something crazy like that. I mean who wants to actually be there???

ours is £1.50 ph....Exactly! we wouldn't be there if we didn't have to....Oh yes, and they made all the surrounding roads *Residents Parking Only* or *Cough up at the Meter*...Grrrrrrrrr!

aye, it is the same round my way too, Disgusting!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOH and the places you phone now that ask you to say your postcode, or say yes or no to things AND then the machine don't even understand you!

This rant made the newspapers, wrote to Richard Branson, still makes me crease.
http://www.irintech.com/x1/blogarchive.php?id=4310

or trying to pre-book a cinema ticket...you can lose the will to live doing that

Computer call centres where they really do not know what you are saying and just assume they do and you can't complain cos there doesn't seem to be a customer service place just another technical support section and all the time the phone bill is adding up.

Call centres definitely, especially when they don't understand you and you can't understand them.

The American"ization" of our cultures and languages

Now a bit of adopting other people's culture is a good thing, but it should be like the spice in the meal and not take up half the bloody plate.

Does every new British sitcom/comedy have to have a bloody american in it

Does every street interview on the news have to have at least one American accent in it?

Do we have to call films - movies, biscuits - cookies, a bit of something - an effing tad....i could go on ad nauseum

Do our highstreets have to be filled with tacky American franchises like MacDonalds, Starbucks and KFCs?

Do our teenagers, who used to be so experimental with fashion in my day, now all have to dress like 60 year old American golfers in their cheap sportswear and baseball caps???

Just because Americans are so easily made to feel they are ugly  unless they have bleached teeth, plastic boobs and have a ton of rat poison in their faces....do we have to be stupid enough to follow suit

AAARGGGGHHHHHH!  i could fill the whole bloody page!!!!!!!!!!

Ohhh I love starbucks, I do.

Tbh, most things annoy me of late. My tolerance level is getting lower and lower as days go by

Tbh, most things annoy me of late. My tolerance level is getting lower and lower as days go by

Leave her alone 

Yup.  Another one for me is Newcastle Airport, who have started charging £1 to drop someone off.  Yes that's right £1 to drive in, open the boot, lift the cases out, say ta'ra and drive off again.  If you want to stay for up to 30 minutes it's £2.50. 

people rubbing bare bums down my leg!!

• Call centres especially Indian ones - I know they're trying to help but I can't understand them and they can't understand me 
• Barack Obamy and pig ignorant US senators
• Neighbours who play loud music through the early hours 
• Buses that never seem to arrive 
• Form filling 

Lal you gave me  a ? and a ? hope it was something nice

Careful, you'll start a rumour that you're my husband. 

* Parps*

charging for a drop off is a bit rich. You're only allowed a couple of minutes at Gatwick...if you need more time you have to use the horrendously expensive car park..I think Heathrow is the same

there are better coffee shops nowadays...they were great when they were the only ones on the block, but there's loads of them now