Virgin were due to install broadband, TV and phone line in our new house. We gave them four weeks warning that we were moving. Between 8 and 1 today they said. They phoned to say it would be late afternoon as the constructors were delayed. I didn't realise they were building a house beside ours. I said okay.
They phoned late afternoon saying there was 'a bit missing' in the road and they couldn't get the cables into our house. I asked him what bits were missing. He told me again the road had bits missing. He said it would take three weeks to 'fix the road' (his words, not mine). I asked him why they waited till the day of installation to check the road didn't have bits missing. Silence. I hung up.
So, I phone Virgin and I get an Indian call centre. I go through telling him everything they should already know from their computers but the guy can't read it because he can't speak English. Meanwhile he is just talking at me, reeling off words from a script. He says I can't speak to customer service as it is an installation problem. He tells me this three times, presumably this normally shuts people up, it did not shut me up.
I tell him we are leaving Virgin and don't want to hear from them ever again. He tells me we have to give notice we are disconnecting the service. I tell him our service from the last place is already disconnected, we do not have any service at all now as the road has bits missing. At this point he is just telling me over and over we must pay for disconnecting the service we don't have.
At this point Prom and the plot part company. I am now swearing at an Indian who probably can't even understand the swear words. He goes to his manager who finally agrees not to charge us for parting company with them.
If you are wondering what the tenuous link is between this thread and people inserting things in their bottom, I was going to cheerfully suggest to the Indian that he takes his script and sticks it as far up his anal passage as he can manage given his personal strength and positioning at the time. I didn't.
I wish I had.