it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
you mum should not be told anything tbh, it's none of her business, legally or otherwise
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
Good luck and lots of love to you both, my heart goes out to you 
I really do thank you all for your replies. I seriously have done NOTHING to warrant this. I just wanted a bit of back-up. I'm definitely going to go down the legal route - mother or good friend of ours medic or not - let alone the bloody social services!!!!
You have all just reinforced what I thought - toally wrong and against the law
thank you all so much
will keep u all informed (if ur interested lol - might even make the papers
)
You have all just reinforced what I thought - toally wrong and against the law
thank you all so much
will keep u all informed (if ur interested lol - might even make the papers
)well said - things like this just make me rantquote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
you mum should not be told anything tbh, it's none of her business, legally or otherwise
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
SORRY EVERYONE
quote:Originally posted by Koala Brother:
if as you say she is severly disabled (not doubting you by the way) how would they consult her about her living arrangements. As her thoughts & yours as her carer need to be considered.
I BELIEVE they are going to speak to her on her own before the next meeting (that I of course know nothing about
)
Can absoluteley understand your frustration/annoyance Barmy, but, sorry again all... so much of the advice you're giving could be off beam depending on the circumstances. Can undertand Barmy if you don't want to give detail, but are you able to say how old she is/ why you are not sending her to school?
quote:Originally posted by Koala Brother:well said - things like this just make me rantquote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
you mum should not be told anything tbh, it's none of her business, legally or otherwise
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
SORRY EVERYONE
me and my dad fell out because of his inability to accept my boy has a problem (he obviously just badly behaved). if the school took to dealing with my dad instead of me and talking behind my back about MY child
i can't imagine how you are feeling brummie
quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:
Can absoluteley understand your frustration/annoyance Barmy, but, sorry again all... so much of the advice you're giving could be off beam depending on the circumstances. Can undertand Barmy if you don't want to give detail, but are you able to say how old she is/ why you are not sending her to school?
Super I think Barmy said her daughter is 18...Apologises if I am mistaken.
quote:Originally posted by ~LEE~:quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:
Can absoluteley understand your frustration/annoyance Barmy, but, sorry again all... so much of the advice you're giving could be off beam depending on the circumstances. Can undertand Barmy if you don't want to give detail, but are you able to say how old she is/ why you are not sending her to school?
Super I think Barmy said her daughter is 18...Apologises if I am mistaken.
she said she'd taken care of her for 18 years. so she must be at least 18
quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:
Can absoluteley understand your frustration/annoyance Barmy, but, sorry again all... so much of the advice you're giving could be off beam depending on the circumstances. Can undertand Barmy if you don't want to give detail, but are you able to say how old she is/ why you are not sending her to school?
to put it bluntly - my daughter was 18 at the beginning of March this year. She is bright as a button and very beautiful. She has severe physical disabilities due to cerebral palsy - she is now the same height as me, but only just touching 4 1/2 stones - nothing to do with being underfed or anything - she just WILL NOT put the weight on. I was the same at her age - I'm still just under 7st myself now.
I have had an anxiety thing going for quite a few years - gradually getting worse. I sort of wake up in the morning and I know exactly what the day is going to be - get my daughter off to school when the bus comes just after 8am - dont see her again til nearly 5pm - I sit in the house all day because I cant go out... so a lot of the time I keep her at home to keep me occupied - NOT company as such - just something to do - look after her - keep my mind away from panicking.... selfish I know.
HOWEVER.... she is NOT neglected - she has everything she wants (and I really mean that!!!) - she IS well fed... well dressed - EXTREMELEY well looked after and never beaten
quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:quote:Originally posted by Koala Brother:well said - things like this just make me rantquote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
you mum should not be told anything tbh, it's none of her business, legally or otherwise
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
SORRY EVERYONE
me and my dad fell out because of his inability to accept my boy has a problem (he obviously just badly behaved). if the school took to dealing with my dad instead of me and talking behind my back about MY child
i can't imagine how you are feeling brummie
I remember reading about it - dont think I responded, but it was quite a sickener in a way - some people just cant help themselves. I hope u have moved on from it I really do
Barmy
I typed a huge post to you with regards to LEA, Data Protection Act, Adults with Incapacity, and other stuff.
Then I realised that some stuff might be related only to Scotland so I deleted it all in case I was giving duff information.
Loads of people here have given great advice, but I'd like to point you in the direction of the Family, Home and Garden message board on the eBay community discussion threads. I have read lots of posts there from parents of disabled children, and some excellent, expert, advice.
Just a few thoughts.
Stay strong, and hey, if you haven't already, it might be time to put your own difficulties first, and get more help.
Last of all, don't let your mother get to you ('cos they do, eh?) You sound like a great Mum x
I typed a huge post to you with regards to LEA, Data Protection Act, Adults with Incapacity, and other stuff.
Then I realised that some stuff might be related only to Scotland so I deleted it all in case I was giving duff information.
Loads of people here have given great advice, but I'd like to point you in the direction of the Family, Home and Garden message board on the eBay community discussion threads. I have read lots of posts there from parents of disabled children, and some excellent, expert, advice.
Just a few thoughts.
Stay strong, and hey, if you haven't already, it might be time to put your own difficulties first, and get more help.
Last of all, don't let your mother get to you ('cos they do, eh?) You sound like a great Mum x
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:quote:Originally posted by Koala Brother:well said - things like this just make me rantquote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
you mum should not be told anything tbh, it's none of her business, legally or otherwise
it breaks all sorts of confidentiality laws
make some heads roll
SORRY EVERYONE
me and my dad fell out because of his inability to accept my boy has a problem (he obviously just badly behaved). if the school took to dealing with my dad instead of me and talking behind my back about MY child
i can't imagine how you are feeling brummie
I remember reading about it - dont think I responded, but it was quite a sickener in a way - some people just cant help themselves. I hope u have moved on from it I really do
i visited him the other day, since we are moving i wanted to leave on positive terms. not like he'll be seeing much of us lol...it wont affect our everyday life. he never apologised though, although he knows he did wrong cos he told my cousin he did (and she never keeps things to herself so told me). thats my dad though, never knows how to handle any sort of emotion...so i just buried the hachett and moved on...certainly wont leave kids with him on his own again...but they missed him.
do they think something is amiss then, cos of her weight and your anxiety (they always look for blame in things)? hence why these secret meetings with your mum (although still non of her business). i just do not get how they can include her but not you ...it's making me see red
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
to put it bluntly - my daughter was 18 at the beginning of March this year. She is bright as a button and very beautiful. She has severe physical disabilities due to cerebral palsy - she is now the same height as me, but only just touching 4 1/2 stones - nothing to do with being underfed or anything - she just WILL NOT put the weight on. I was the same at her age - I'm still just under 7st myself now.
I have had an anxiety thing going for quite a few years - gradually getting worse. I sort of wake up in the morning and I know exactly what the day is going to be - get my daughter off to school when the bus comes just after 8am - dont see her again til nearly 5pm - I sit in the house all day because I cant go out... so a lot of the time I keep her at home to keep me occupied - NOT company as such - just something to do - look after her - keep my mind away from panicking.... selfish I know.
HOWEVER.... she is NOT neglected - she has everything she wants (and I really mean that!!!) - she IS well fed... well dressed - EXTREMELEY well looked after and never beaten
Awww Barmy, you poor thing,
sounds terrible for you and it must have been v hard looking after her all these years, but I guess you love her so much that it didn't feel so hard at all? I imagine that she has an SEN statement until she is 19 which means that she should be attending school and that people are trying to plan for her transition into adulthood and her longer term needs. It does seem rather odd that you were not invited to the meeting, but, my advice would be, rather than just get into a fight with the authorities over this matter, however hard and unfair it seems for you..try and really think if you can honestly say that keeping her at home with you all day every day is what is really best for her? I know that that this must be unbearably hard and I don't think it's even remotely possible to do this stuff on here.I'll go back to my earlier comment, get in touch with your parent partnership officer, they are independent of the local authotity and I've yet not to meet one who has been anything other than really helpful and supportive-for you and for her quote:Posts: 178 | Registered: 06 June 2009
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Trying to reply to both of u Hyper n Darth lol!!!!
I have had several counselling sessions over the last 3 years (altho the anxiety/panic has been going on for nearly 10 years). None of it has worked. I've had CBT and pretty much every free NHS test going. I DID find out about 2 years ago that I had a hole in my heart (news to me - but not to my mother apparently - had it since I was born - BUT IT WAS ONLY A LITTLE ONE SO WHO CARES ((basically)))
y'll might like to google hole in heart/anxiety/panic attacks/migraine - I have suffered with SEVERE migraine since age 16. Was put on high dose beta-blockers at age 22 (for migraine
)sorry for anyone reading this who doesnt know already - I'm 39 (and a woman) lol!!!!
I think that Darth - u no.... ur dad is a grown man - he's been thru lifes 'stuff' and he should know when to back down - having said that - I bet u always feel like giving him a nudge every now n then to back down - and he doesnt... - its a generation thing I think - sad but true
in answer to what u were saying about my daughters weight. Her weight has ALWAYS been an issue of sorts - she was born at 29 1/2 week, weighed 2lb 12oz - so her weight has always been forefront of everything. She has done incredibly well this last 18 months with her weight, bearing in mind that she had her most drastic surgery to date in this period (96 degree bend in back was straightened). She was in hospital for 12 days (3 in ICU)- I never left the hospital the whole time (coz I'm SUCH a crap mommy lol). Anyway I was warned that she WOULD lose weight - and guess what?? she didnt!!! she kept stable and even put some on in the months that followed. I appreciate that she's dinky -always has been and always will be
quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
to put it bluntly - my daughter was 18 at the beginning of March this year. She is bright as a button and very beautiful. She has severe physical disabilities due to cerebral palsy - she is now the same height as me, but only just touching 4 1/2 stones - nothing to do with being underfed or anything - she just WILL NOT put the weight on. I was the same at her age - I'm still just under 7st myself now.
I have had an anxiety thing going for quite a few years - gradually getting worse. I sort of wake up in the morning and I know exactly what the day is going to be - get my daughter off to school when the bus comes just after 8am - dont see her again til nearly 5pm - I sit in the house all day because I cant go out... so a lot of the time I keep her at home to keep me occupied - NOT company as such - just something to do - look after her - keep my mind away from panicking.... selfish I know.
HOWEVER.... she is NOT neglected - she has everything she wants (and I really mean that!!!) - she IS well fed... well dressed - EXTREMELEY well looked after and never beaten
Awww Barmy, you poor thing,
thanks for that - yes she has been statemented since she was about 2 years old. I thought it was a year on year thing??? I have to go to the school for annual statementing meetings (amongst loads of other stuff - physio etc etc) - what is this parent partnership thing?? I've never heard of it?
Thanks again
i think this is it?
http://www.parentpartnership.o...ands/birmingham.aspx
thats the brummy one someone told me about them earlier today...so thats spooky 
http://www.parentpartnership.o...ands/birmingham.aspx
thats the brummy one
someone told me about them earlier today...so thats spooky quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
i think this is it?
http://www.parentpartnership.o...ands/birmingham.aspx
thats the brummy one
wow - thanks so much for that - I am going to add to my fves and get onto it tomorrow - and again thanks so much for chattting tonight. I hope I have helped u a little bit too???
I am off to bed now, ready to fight my corner tomorrow
thanx - and thanx everyone for ur contributions - luv u all xxx
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Posts: 178 | Registered: 06 June 2009
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Trying to reply to both of u Hyper n Darth lol!!!!
I have had several counselling sessions over the last 3 years (altho the anxiety/panic has been going on for nearly 10 years). None of it has worked. I've had CBT and pretty much every free NHS test going. I DID find out about 2 years ago that I had a hole in my heart (news to me - but not to my mother apparently - had it since I was born - BUT IT WAS ONLY A LITTLE ONE SO WHO CARES ((basically)))
y'll might like to google hole in heart/anxiety/panic attacks/migraine - I have suffered with SEVERE migraine since age 16. Was put on high dose beta-blockers at age 22 (for migraine
sorry for anyone reading this who doesnt know already - I'm 39 (and a woman) lol!!!!
I think that Darth - u no.... ur dad is a grown man - he's been thru lifes 'stuff' and he should know when to back down - having said that - I bet u always feel like giving him a nudge every now n then to back down - and he doesnt... - its a generation thing I think - sad but true
in answer to what u were saying about my daughters weight. Her weight has ALWAYS been an issue of sorts - she was born at 29 1/2 week, weighed 2lb 12oz - so her weight has always been forefront of everything. She has done incredibly well this last 18 months with her weight, bearing in mind that she had her most drastic surgery to date in this period (96 degree bend in back was straightened). She was in hospital for 12 days (3 in ICU)- I never left the hospital the whole time (coz I'm SUCH a crap mommy lol). Anyway I was warned that she WOULD lose weight - and guess what?? she didnt!!! she kept stable and even put some on in the months that followed. I appreciate that she's dinky -always has been and always will be
she didn't tell you that you had a hole in the heart?
i'd of thought that was pretty important to know i susspect my dad to be on the spectrum himself tbh, autism can be hereditary and he shows a hell of alot of traits so i think his problems are to do with that...i'd be a hypocrite if i didn't 'forgive' him for not being first to apologise etc..seeing as my son is quite like that lol! ofc dad would never think he has anything wrong with him so i dont bother mentioning it to him..wont get him or me nowhere. you're right about the generation thing...he is VERY old fashioned.
it's good that your daughter is making such progress after an op like that
some people are dinky you say you are yourself so you know that only too well lol. i find alot of emphasis is put on weight..whether it's too heavy or too light...and it just makes people paranoid. as long as you KNOW she is eating fine, and as you say she put some weight on, i'm sure she is ok. my son is underweight...he eats like a pig! but he doens't stop moving...literally lol. he is so slight bless him but i know he is not malnourished...just as you know your daughter isn't. it's like that study recently that found ut that the newborn baby weight gaining graph on the NHS booklets are aimed at bottle fed babies (which tend to get heavier quicker) so mothers who breastfed and whose babies were not putting on much weight...were told they were not feeding their babies properly when it was the bloody graphs were misleading sorry for rambling about that lol...it just reminded me of that 
quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
to put it bluntly - my daughter was 18 at the beginning of March this year. She is bright as a button and very beautiful. She has severe physical disabilities due to cerebral palsy - she is now the same height as me, but only just touching 4 1/2 stones - nothing to do with being underfed or anything - she just WILL NOT put the weight on. I was the same at her age - I'm still just under 7st myself now.
I have had an anxiety thing going for quite a few years - gradually getting worse. I sort of wake up in the morning and I know exactly what the day is going to be - get my daughter off to school when the bus comes just after 8am - dont see her again til nearly 5pm - I sit in the house all day because I cant go out... so a lot of the time I keep her at home to keep me occupied - NOT company as such - just something to do - look after her - keep my mind away from panicking.... selfish I know.
HOWEVER.... she is NOT neglected - she has everything she wants (and I really mean that!!!) - she IS well fed... well dressed - EXTREMELEY well looked after and never beaten
Awww Barmy, you poor thing,
Darth has provided me with a link which I will follow up tomorrow. I wouldnt mind talking wiht u tho again (here or preferably elsewhere) - u seem to know the 'jargon' lol!!! I totally understand everything that you have said, regarding keeping my daughter at home and about HER needs etc - this has all been said to me before. MY difficulty is that I am quite entrenched in MY 'thing' ie the panic/anxiety. I do my best with my daughter - she really REALLY does not want for anything materialistically and I am with her 24/7 and do EVERYTHING for her (except when she DOES go to school lol - I feel they dont look after her like I do).
I dunno - I would like to talk to you more away from here??
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:
i think this is it?
http://www.parentpartnership.o...ands/birmingham.aspx
thats the brummy one
wow - thanks so much for that - I am going to add to my fves and get onto it tomorrow - and again thanks so much for chattting tonight. I hope I have helped u a little bit too???
I am off to bed now, ready to fight my corner tomorrow
thanx - and thanx everyone for ur contributions - luv u all xxx
np, as i say i heard about them today for when i move to essex. so figured to good to share the info
(though super has to take credit for that...i was just quicker with the number 
)chatting always helps hun
problem shared is a problem halved...or something lolnn and god bless
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
what is this parent partnership thing?? I've never heard of it?
Thanks again
The Parent partnership service in my area are fantastic, they are independent and are there to support parents of disabled childen/young people, particularly when they are in dispute with the local authority. They have a brilliant understanding of how difficult it is for parents, but also balance that with the rights of children/young people in a very sensitive and understanding way. I don't want to do this in any detail on here, but I imagine your v v real needs in terms of your anxiety
are impacting on your daughter's needs for a 'grown-up' life of her own, shit that's SOOOO hard with a non-disabled child, never mind when you've probably dedicated your whole life to looking after her and her additional needs. In my experience they will understand that, won't judge, but will help. I've taken a wild stab that you're from Birmingham LOL and googled for your areaParent partnership Birmingham Goog luck quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Posts: 178 | Registered: 06 June 2009
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Trying to reply to both of u Hyper n Darth lol!!!!
I have had several counselling sessions over the last 3 years (altho the anxiety/panic has been going on for nearly 10 years). None of it has worked. I've had CBT and pretty much every free NHS test going. I DID find out about 2 years ago that I had a hole in my heart (news to me - but not to my mother apparently - had it since I was born - BUT IT WAS ONLY A LITTLE ONE SO WHO CARES ((basically)))
y'll might like to google hole in heart/anxiety/panic attacks/migraine - I have suffered with SEVERE migraine since age 16. Was put on high dose beta-blockers at age 22 (for migraine
sorry for anyone reading this who doesnt know already - I'm 39 (and a woman) lol!!!!
I think that Darth - u no.... ur dad is a grown man - he's been thru lifes 'stuff' and he should know when to back down - having said that - I bet u always feel like giving him a nudge every now n then to back down - and he doesnt... - its a generation thing I think - sad but true
in answer to what u were saying about my daughters weight. Her weight has ALWAYS been an issue of sorts - she was born at 29 1/2 week, weighed 2lb 12oz - so her weight has always been forefront of everything. She has done incredibly well this last 18 months with her weight, bearing in mind that she had her most drastic surgery to date in this period (96 degree bend in back was straightened). She was in hospital for 12 days (3 in ICU)- I never left the hospital the whole time (coz I'm SUCH a crap mommy lol). Anyway I was warned that she WOULD lose weight - and guess what?? she didnt!!! she kept stable and even put some on in the months that followed. I appreciate that she's dinky -always has been and always will be
she didn't tell you that you had a hole in the heart?
i susspect my dad to be on the spectrum himself tbh, autism can be hereditary and he shows a hell of alot of traits so i think his problems are to do with that...i'd be a hypocrite if i didn't 'forgive' him for not being first to apologise etc..seeing as my son is quite like that lol! ofc dad would never think he has anything wrong with him so i dont bother mentioning it to him..wont get him or me nowhere. you're right about the generation thing...he is VERY old fashioned.
it's good that your daughter is making such progress after an op like that
I DO think its very sad that ur dad wont accept tho - especially if he might recognise himself a bit in it???
Like I said, I read ur thread at the time and it was quite heartbreaking in a way - but u had/have a choice to make dont u? I dont know whether u've made that choice or are about to. Like I said before - he's seen more life than you have (one would think so) and so should be more accepting (apart from the generation thing). If its a generation thing and he totally totally will not even meet half way - then what can I isay? I feel for u I really do, because I know myself.... father.... son.... trying to keep everyone onside, NOT to score points - but because they are family at the end of the day
Sorry Barmie, I can't help.
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
I dunno - I would like to talk to you more away from here??
Happy for you to pm me Barmy and do what I can to help - yeah I do know 'the 'jargon'
Don't suppose this is the moment to say that all of us 'social worky' peeps aren't 'scum' as I've read on here several times, but hey WTF, it's my opportunity to say so in a friendly thread LOL!quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
I dunno - I would like to talk to you more away from here??
Happy for you to pm me Barmy and do what I can to help - yeah I do know 'the 'jargon'
great stuff - have PM'd u already lol!!! Not up to talking 2nite coz I have to be a good mom - but plz reply to me and I will collar u 2morra if thats ok?
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Originally posted by Supercalifragilistic:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
I dunno - I would like to talk to you more away from here??
Happy for you to pm me Barmy and do what I can to help - yeah I do know 'the 'jargon'
great stuff - have PM'd u already lol!!! Not up to talking 2nite coz I have to be a good mom - but plz reply to me and I will collar u 2morra if thats ok?
Please reply to me - I HAVE to go to bed now - believe me - if it wasnt for my daughter I would still be banging on about this for several hours!!!
[QUOTE]Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:
I will, I was about to go to bed before I saw this thread, I'm only still up because my heart went out to you
Oh and BTW, you too Darthoob, remember reading the thread about your dad yonks ago and was so sad for you
But I tell you what, you two are fantastic in adversity and have such a generosity of spirit, you could teach some of them bloody 'dogooders' a thing or two!
I will, I was about to go to bed before I saw this thread, I'm only still up because my heart went out to you
Oh and BTW, you too Darthoob
, remember reading the thread about your dad yonks ago and was so sad for you But I tell you what, you two are fantastic in adversity and have such a generosity of spirit, you could teach some of them bloody 'dogooders' a thing or two!
i had my boyfriend waiting in bed for me and everything! but i wanted to make sure you was ok
he was sleep when i finally went upstairs...so you owe me one session of naughties!
i've added you to the bookface, feel free to talk to me at any time
he was sleep when i finally went upstairs...so you owe me one session of naughties!
i've added you to the bookface, feel free to talk to me at any time
quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Originally posted by Darthhoob:quote:Originally posted by BARMY BRUMMIE:quote:Posts: 178 | Registered: 06 June 2009
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Trying to reply to both of u Hyper n Darth lol!!!!
I have had several counselling sessions over the last 3 years (altho the anxiety/panic has been going on for nearly 10 years). None of it has worked. I've had CBT and pretty much every free NHS test going. I DID find out about 2 years ago that I had a hole in my heart (news to me - but not to my mother apparently - had it since I was born - BUT IT WAS ONLY A LITTLE ONE SO WHO CARES ((basically)))
y'll might like to google hole in heart/anxiety/panic attacks/migraine - I have suffered with SEVERE migraine since age 16. Was put on high dose beta-blockers at age 22 (for migraine
sorry for anyone reading this who doesnt know already - I'm 39 (and a woman) lol!!!!
I think that Darth - u no.... ur dad is a grown man - he's been thru lifes 'stuff' and he should know when to back down - having said that - I bet u always feel like giving him a nudge every now n then to back down - and he doesnt... - its a generation thing I think - sad but true
in answer to what u were saying about my daughters weight. Her weight has ALWAYS been an issue of sorts - she was born at 29 1/2 week, weighed 2lb 12oz - so her weight has always been forefront of everything. She has done incredibly well this last 18 months with her weight, bearing in mind that she had her most drastic surgery to date in this period (96 degree bend in back was straightened). She was in hospital for 12 days (3 in ICU)- I never left the hospital the whole time (coz I'm SUCH a crap mommy lol). Anyway I was warned that she WOULD lose weight - and guess what?? she didnt!!! she kept stable and even put some on in the months that followed. I appreciate that she's dinky -always has been and always will be
she didn't tell you that you had a hole in the heart?
i susspect my dad to be on the spectrum himself tbh, autism can be hereditary and he shows a hell of alot of traits so i think his problems are to do with that...i'd be a hypocrite if i didn't 'forgive' him for not being first to apologise etc..seeing as my son is quite like that lol! ofc dad would never think he has anything wrong with him so i dont bother mentioning it to him..wont get him or me nowhere. you're right about the generation thing...he is VERY old fashioned.
it's good that your daughter is making such progress after an op like that
I DO think its very sad that ur dad wont accept tho - especially if he might recognise himself a bit in it???
Like I said, I read ur thread at the time and it was quite heartbreaking in a way - but u had/have a choice to make dont u? I dont know whether u've made that choice or are about to. Like I said before - he's seen more life than you have (one would think so) and so should be more accepting (apart from the generation thing). If its a generation thing and he totally totally will not even meet half way - then what can I isay? I feel for u I really do, because I know myself.... father.... son.... trying to keep everyone onside, NOT to score points - but because they are family at the end of the day
thats the thing, he doesn't recognise himself in it at all lol. all he sees is bad behaviour, he doesn't see the traits...just thinks son is a bit strange.
he says aspergers didn't exist in his day. wont listen when i point out it was discovered in world war 2 but the research got lost till the 90s....he thinks he knows it all. hence why we moving nearer OH'sfamily for support, we need support atm as son been difficult to cope with of late. but as you say he is my family, and i dont want to stay angry...i was in a bad place before i saw him, my only parent left and i felt he dudn't care. when i met him it was obvious he did care....just useless at expressing it.
Darthhoob I live in Essex, and I have a son with Aspergers. I have had a lot of help and if I can give you any information please let me know.
Barmy, sorry I can't help with your problem but you have been given a lot of sound advice on here. All I can offer is a
Barmy, sorry I can't help with your problem but you have been given a lot of sound advice on here. All I can offer is a