Im so unhappy! Uni isnt what i thought it would be , i cant keep up with the work or find any motivation to do it , i feel like im a terrible person and bad friend who doesn't deserve any of the friends i have. and nothing seems to be changing , maybe it would be best if i just left it all behind.. i just hate being me!
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Uni isnt what i thought it would be
I know how that feels
Cheer up mate We love you and we're your friends you totally deserve us!
Yeah alright I know this might sound patronising and what you want to hear etc etc. Have you tried talking to some of your teachers?
Here's some cupcakes to cheer you up
Aww chicken. I know it seems like it now but it wouldn't be the end of the world if you gave up Uni - have you any idea what you would like to do?
Och darling
Have you tried talking to your parents or someone you look up to?
Just bear in mind that everyone feels like this sometimes and the world has a habit of pushing us in directions we sometimes don't want to go but when we look back we can usually find a positive
Sorry I haven't been much help but I really hope you feel better soon.
Have you tried talking to your parents or someone you look up to?
Just bear in mind that everyone feels like this sometimes and the world has a habit of pushing us in directions we sometimes don't want to go but when we look back we can usually find a positive
Sorry I haven't been much help but I really hope you feel better soon.
Chicken, can you talk to your mum or dad about how you are feeling?
My youngest son has recently told us that he hates his Uni course (he's in second year). He has passed all his exams so far, but just isn't enjoying it any more and he wants to go in a completely different direction. His dad and I are supporting his decision, because we want him to be happy. Talk to your mum and dad and explain how you are feeling, Sweetheart. They may already have some idea that you are unhappy, and will want to help.
Incidentally, IMO you are a lovely young man, you are not a terrible person.
My youngest son has recently told us that he hates his Uni course (he's in second year). He has passed all his exams so far, but just isn't enjoying it any more and he wants to go in a completely different direction. His dad and I are supporting his decision, because we want him to be happy. Talk to your mum and dad and explain how you are feeling, Sweetheart. They may already have some idea that you are unhappy, and will want to help.
Incidentally, IMO you are a lovely young man, you are not a terrible person.
Awwww Chicken..... huge I have nothing to add to all the good advice your friends have given you here... it may just be first year blues....but university is not the B all and end all........ talk to your mum and dad, or someone else you trust.... and as Yogi says.. NO WAY are you a terrible person.... you are lovely.
Awwwwwww chicken - you must find somebody to talk to at uni - there must be somebody and you must tell your parents.
Are you in Halls - can you not talk to somebody you live with???
You are not a terrible person - but please try to find the help you need
My son is in his first year at Uni and I would want to know if he felt like this PLEASE talk to somebody ASAP
Are you in Halls - can you not talk to somebody you live with???
You are not a terrible person - but please try to find the help you need
My son is in his first year at Uni and I would want to know if he felt like this PLEASE talk to somebody ASAP
Aww Chicken, my daughter was exactly the same, it just wasn't for her. I heard her crying one weekend when she came home, I eventually coaxed it out of her why she was so unhappy and she was scared to tell me, thinking she'd let me down. I drove to Uni the next day and brought all her belongings back. She got a fantastic job now and never looked back. Please try and talk to someone...
thanks for all advice , its nice to know ive got you guys on here i dont know what to do. Ive discussed it with my parents a number of times and their argument is your getting great grades so why quit?
They want the best for me , i suppose and i have some happy times there this year. Met nice people.
I cant help but think i would be happier doing something else though , coz ive been more unhappy than happy there this year. thats for sure.
Im confused
They want the best for me , i suppose and i have some happy times there this year. Met nice people.
I cant help but think i would be happier doing something else though , coz ive been more unhappy than happy there this year. thats for sure.
Im confused
n't panic - it's not the end of the world. Is there not a student counsellor you can talk to? Sometimes you need a year or two away from any studies to gain perspective - maybe uni really isn't for you. Whatever the future holds - dont feel pressurised to do anything you dont want to. As I said before - it's not the end of the world .......................you'll be unhappy if you continue on the wrong path - talk to someone anmd get some advice.
Perhaps you could try talking to them again Chicken, if you really think you want to do something else, I am sure they would understand. But if you are getting good grades and have met some nice people, may be you are just a bit low at the moment. Is their a student counsellor at uni you could talk to... or your personal tutor? Perhaps they could help you sort things out and help you to explain things to your mum and dad?
i cant help but think tho if i did tell them i wanted to seriously drop out they would be disappointed. both my brother and sister have finished and got their degrees.
i struggle this year with the work , despite the grades , so what chance do i have for the next two years where the work is supposed to get doubly hard
i feel lonely aswell at uni a lot , despite the people ive met. I really dont know what to do
i struggle this year with the work , despite the grades , so what chance do i have for the next two years where the work is supposed to get doubly hard
i feel lonely aswell at uni a lot , despite the people ive met. I really dont know what to do
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Whatever the future holds - dont feel pressurised to do anything you dont want to. As I said before - it's not the end of the world .......................you'll be unhappy if you continue on the wrong path - talk to someone anmd get some advice.
Soozy is right Chicken.... and I am sure whatever else, your parents would not want you to be unhappyReference:
i cant help but think tho if i did tell them i wanted to seriously drop out they would be disappointed. both my brother and sister have finished and got their degrees.
But that's your brother and sister .......it's not you! We can't all be the same ...................if you weren't at Uni what would you want to be doing? If you go to your parents with some sort of plan/idea they may not be displesased ................you can't live your life to please others.Talk to someone neutral and take some time to think about what you want from life. So many kids go to university simply because it's expected or the next step ......maybe you really dont need a degree gor what you want in life. what do you want in life? what would you rather be doing? Please don't be too hard on yourself ...................if you don't like what you're doing - you don't. It's not being a failure to say that ........it's actually a positive to recognise that this is not what you want.
My son was very unhappy so I told him to drop out which he did, he's took a year out and has finally found the course he wants....
Chicken, I agree with everything Baz and Soozy have said to you.
Don't put yourself under pressure to achieve the same things as your brother and sister. You are an individual, and university might not be for you.
Don't put yourself under pressure to achieve the same things as your brother and sister. You are an individual, and university might not be for you.
Awww Chicken, try talking to your lecturer or someone who can give you advice. Don't be hard on yourself because you're a nice person.. maybe it's given you food for thought but try and stay positive then consider what you want to do about it.
Former Member
Chicken Lots of good advice here re your course, but what worries me most is you feeling that you are a terrible person who doesn't deserve your friends and your hating being you. You sound depressed honey and that you're being waaaaaay too hard on yourself please. please talk to your GP/a counsellor and try to sort things out
The best way to deserve and keep a friend is to be one.
Chicken I do hope you are not feeling unworthy or inadequate.
It would not surprise me if people around you admire you and wish they could emulate you.
Don't think yourself downwards, when there are people who wish they could bring to life what you do.
Chicken I do hope you are not feeling unworthy or inadequate.
It would not surprise me if people around you admire you and wish they could emulate you.
Don't think yourself downwards, when there are people who wish they could bring to life what you do.
My oldest son felt the same as you in his first year at uni . He phoned every night to tell me how unhappy he was, and I was devastated .....Not because he wanted to give up, but he didn't want me to tell his dad, because he thought he would be disappointed
I told him to come home immediately, because he sounded so depressed.
If he hadn't told me,and something had happened to him.......I would never have forgiven myself.
You have to talk to your parents about this, or someone that you trust
My son now goes to a uni 20 miles away , and travels every day. He's much happier now, and so am I.
If he'd given up his studies, and decided uni wasn't for him.....I wouldn't think any less of him, and I'm sure your parents would feel the same
I told him to come home immediately, because he sounded so depressed.
If he hadn't told me,and something had happened to him.......I would never have forgiven myself.
You have to talk to your parents about this, or someone that you trust
My son now goes to a uni 20 miles away , and travels every day. He's much happier now, and so am I.
If he'd given up his studies, and decided uni wasn't for him.....I wouldn't think any less of him, and I'm sure your parents would feel the same
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i cant help but think tho if i did tell them i wanted to seriously drop out they would be disappointed.
It's your life, and you're just starting out. It's never too late to go back to your education at a later date if you want to. You may feel you will disappoint your parents but I'm sure they would rather know you were happy rather than putting yourself through this to please them when it's not what you want to do.Sounds like you're still unsure, so don't throw the towel in just yet, try and speak to someone at Uni (counsellor as already suggested) and just see what your options are. Never put yourself through something that makes you feel that low thinking it will keep someone else happy. They're your parents, they love you. Hope things work out for you
Chicken, this is a link to the University Counselling Services site. There is plenty of help provided here and also provides links to the various university counselling services around the country, so I think it is worth your time having a look at this.
You have already taken a major step to dealing with your worries and stress by being honest with yourself and opening up rather than bottling it up, so well done..
You have already taken a major step to dealing with your worries and stress by being honest with yourself and opening up rather than bottling it up, so well done..
OMG Chickie Chowder listen - the same happened to me a few years ago.
I have to go to bed now (after nightshift) but i will post wot happened to me later and i hope it helps
I have to go to bed now (after nightshift) but i will post wot happened to me later and i hope it helps
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, i cant keep up with the work or find any motivation to do it , i feel like im a terrible person and bad friend who
You are not a terrible person,you are normal.Everyone feels like you do in the beginning because it's new territory.Stick at it girl it'll be worth it in the end.Give it at least a year before you think of packing it in.You've worked hard to get the place in Uni,Talk to some of the other girls that are doing the same subjects as you.You will regret it later if you leave now without giving it a fighting chance.
It could be worse chicken...you could have piles!
chin up chick, don't let things get you down or i'll have to come round and give you a slap!
chin up chick, don't let things get you down or i'll have to come round and give you a slap!
Former Member
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Stick at it girl
OMG, Is chicken a girl? I always thought that chicken was male! Even extra hugs if I got your gender wrong chicken
You must be about to sit your first year exams Chicken ... why not see how you do with them before making any decisions.
If you decide to leave it's no biggie - just make sure that you have a plan ... sitting at home feeling you are a terrible person won't make you feel good about yourself.
Here - have a big hug
If you decide to leave it's no biggie - just make sure that you have a plan ... sitting at home feeling you are a terrible person won't make you feel good about yourself.
Here - have a big hug
Former Member
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You must be about to sit your first year exams Chicken ... why not see how you do with them before making any decisions.
Good thinking Rexi, my niece was really unhappy at her first Uni, but she completed the year, had a year out travelling, then she arranged to go to Durham, to do an entirely different subject and they took her straight into the second year.Reference:
OMG, Is chicken a girl? I always thought that chicken was male! Even extra hugs if I got your gender wrong chicken
Chicken is a male.
yes im male
thanks for all the advice i appreciate it all
did not sleep very last nite at all! kept waking up ,that did not amuse me at all!
Went for a bike ride today , to do some thinking , clear my head , or to at least calm me down. It worked a bit and i am feeling better
Still undecided about a few things , but i guess these things cant be solved over night or too quickly.
Once again thank you all , you are such good friends
thanks for all the advice i appreciate it all
did not sleep very last nite at all! kept waking up ,that did not amuse me at all!
Went for a bike ride today , to do some thinking , clear my head , or to at least calm me down. It worked a bit and i am feeling better
Still undecided about a few things , but i guess these things cant be solved over night or too quickly.
Once again thank you all , you are such good friends
Chicken, I'm really glad you are feeling a little more positive today.
Don't ever forget, there are lots of people on here who like and care about you.
Don't ever forget, there are lots of people on here who like and care about you.
Thanks yogi joing channel 4 2 years ago was been a better decision of mine! never regretted it for a moment!
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joing channel 4 2 years ago was been a better decision of mine!
Me too.
It's a bit different but my son flunked his AS levels and it seemed like the end of the world! He re-did the year (credit to him) and is now at a local Uni so he travels from home every day.
Glad the bike ride helped CHicken - El's link looks good, have a look at it
Glad the bike ride helped CHicken - El's link looks good, have a look at it
Chickie Chowder - i aint forgotten about you - i just slept in.
I will write you a proper reply about my experience and final decision to leave my teaching course - its a big decision so i understand your dilema - it changes the direction of your life .... and at such a young age - its too much to ask sometimes.
One thing i wud say, briefly, is ... don't do anything in haste just yet - talk to your tutor - y'know the one everyone likes.
Laters . . . take care
I will write you a proper reply about my experience and final decision to leave my teaching course - its a big decision so i understand your dilema - it changes the direction of your life .... and at such a young age - its too much to ask sometimes.
One thing i wud say, briefly, is ... don't do anything in haste just yet - talk to your tutor - y'know the one everyone likes.
Laters . . . take care
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joing channel 4 2 years ago was been a better decision of mine!
Me too
Me three Glad you are feeling a little better ChickenMe too
Lots of good advice for you Chicken....maybe uni isn't for you, or maybe it's the course you are doing, or being away from home for the first time, or all three.
Please talk to your parents...they do want what is best for you and would never want you to be unhappy. In the meantime, your personal tutor or student counsellor may be able to help. All the best, hope you get yourself sorted
Please talk to your parents...they do want what is best for you and would never want you to be unhappy. In the meantime, your personal tutor or student counsellor may be able to help. All the best, hope you get yourself sorted
feeling rubbish today!
swamped with work , went to bed feeling low and woke up feeling lower
swamped with work , went to bed feeling low and woke up feeling lower
Chicken, I have just made a posting on another thread where someone else is having emotional problems - not the same as yours. However the advice I have given applies to you.
Don't forget The Samaritans. They are there now to listen to you and will give you help in understanding what your options are. They are there to help people who are under stress and don't know what to do. They don't just deal with people who are feeling suicidal.
Don't delay - ACT NOW
Don't forget The Samaritans. They are there now to listen to you and will give you help in understanding what your options are. They are there to help people who are under stress and don't know what to do. They don't just deal with people who are feeling suicidal.
Don't delay - ACT NOW
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