Gawd its hilarious 
... with thanks to AOTB who posted this on DS 
Annoyingly they have the same initial so Liz is L, Luisa is Z for Zissman,
Lousia walks into the bathroom, where Liz is relaxing in the bath.
L- I've just been thinking about poor dead Squeaky
Z- Oh god that's depressing!
L- ..she was so ill before she died.
Z- But she's not ill now she's in a better place
L- She had fluid on her lungs and couldn't get out of the cat flap, and I just think I let her down you know. (looks sad)
Z- It's not your fault
L- Yeah it was- I should have acted 2 weeks before when she psychic-ally, told me she was ready to go, and I was selfish, so I've been having a good cry about Squeeky.
Z- Oh don't cry- Squeeky's in cat heaven. Oh Liz Don't cry! (looks sad too)
L- (ignoring Luisa's line and continuing..) I dreamt about her last night..
Z- Did you?
L- Yeah... I might come out of here and Hilda's gone... (pauses) and my mum will have died....
Z- (horrified) Liz! Stop thinking about people dying!
L- Well I'm in a downward spiral you see- this is what happens if I don't get enough nuts and nutrients... If I had a car I'd drive into a tree!
Z- Oh my god!
L- ..and I have body dismorphic disorder..so the mirrors really do my head in you know... I need blinkers.
Z- (protesting) You've got fabulous figure
L- No I haven't, I haven't. I've got 'old lady' bottom.
Z- (insistent) You have!(nervous laughter)Liz!!
L- It's like that ice-cream.
Z- What Ice cream?
L- You know.. Vienetta.. all the folds..(pause)and it's melting..
Z- (mixture of bewilderment and shock!) You haven't got Vienetta bottom
L- ..and I'll come out of here and my boyfriend will have run off with another woman..
Z- Liz that's silly! Stop it!
L- (sighs) So.. I just feel full of tears (forlorn face). When I come out, I'll be the first person to come out of Big Brother without any friends that will be there when I come out, and that makes me even MORE sad.
Z- Oh no! I don't want to make you sad- I want to make you laugh!
L- (deeper sigh).. and I'm just going to die a lonely old woman.. you know with no one to see me when I come out apart from my agent... and HE probably won't even be there. I think I'm really really depressed.
L- Do you?
L-Like clinically depressed.. I think I need to inhale Valium.
Z- (protesting) You've got a boyfriend that loves you!
L- (deadpan) He might have left me.
Z- Why has he suddenly left you?
L- Because he's seen me in really strong lighting- THAT's never happened before.
Z- (incredulously)Oh Liz that's silly!
L- (continuing) ..and first thing in the morning without makeup.
Z-So?
L- ..seriously first thing in the morning without makeup, I literally look like I've been dead for 3 weeks!
Z- (laughs then covers mouth in nervous shock laughter/ horror)
L- ...I'm like a tortoise.
Z- Liz- stop it!!
L- I wonder how hard it is to drown.. in a bath (deadpan again whilst turning head down to look at the water in the bath)
Z- (eyes wide) Please don't kill yourself
L-(puts hand on head) I'm not in a good place this evening.
Z- People would die to have your figure.. and you've got nice hands, and you've got big eyes, and when you smile, you eyes smile and your whole face lights up.. and you've got a great head of hair..
L- (Looks at Luisa)..But I never smile. (shakes head and pauses) Ever.
Z- Why?
L- because I'm not a happy person.. I've got that disease where you can't be happy.
Z- Do you want to try laughing therapy?
L- (Looks at Luisa deadpan) No.
Z- I get so frustrated with you that you're like this, (then nervous joking) literally I want to drown you.
L- (looks at her deadpan again) Do you?
Z- (nervously) Yes?
L- (nods).. I DO bring other people down.
(cuts to living room).
Liz was pretending to be depressed, Cinds. It was part of a task.
