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I hate all the X Factor judges. They tell talentless twonks how amazing they were. I hate losing (yes Chelsea I'm talking to you). I hate the thickie twins (Cameron and Clegg). I hate the pot noodle people (Bombay Bad Boy rocks so what do you do? You ruin it with sweetcorn and peas. I hate you). I hate most of the X Factor contestants. Mary, f*ck off back to Tescos. Rebecca, stop singing everything exactly in the same way. Matt become a man not a girl. Wagner please cease to exist. One Direction the direction I want you to go in is off a cliff. Katie learn to sing. Cher stick your (c)rap where the sun don't shine.

Arsene Wenger you're a whingeing knob. Fergie you're an oxygen thief. Ian Holloway you're demented.

All boy bands please make a mass suicide pact and don't forget to invite all the girl bands.  

I could go on forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, but I won't. So yeah, there just ain't enough love in the world anymore and guess what? IT'S ALL MY FAULT!

*wibble*

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Reference:
Oh I love her to bits, it's all the other fekkers that are winding me up
Can't you do a Mr. Cosi and ignore all these sh*tty reality programmes?
I may be hooked but it'd be unbearable if he were drawn in as well.

As Sprout said, we can't help you with the footy but at least it'd be only ONE irritation slapping you regularly around the chops.
Cosmopolitan
Reference:
I hate all the X Factor judges. They tell talentless twonks how amazing they were. I hate losing (yes Chelsea I'm talking to you). I hate the thickie twins (Cameron and Clegg). I hate the pot noodle people (Bombay Bad Boy rocks so what do you do? You ruin it with sweetcorn and peas. I hate you). I hate most of the X Factor contestants. Mary, f*ck off back to Tescos. Rebecca, stop singing everything exactly in the same way. Matt become a man not a girl. Wagner please cease to exist. One Direction the direction I want you to go in is off a cliff. Katie learn to sing. Cher stick your (c)rap where the sun don't shine. Arsene Wenger you're a whingeing knob. Fergie you're an oxygen thief. Ian Holloway you're demented. All boy bands please make a mass suicide pact and don't forget to invite all the girl bands. I could go on forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, but I won't. So yeah, there just ain't enough love in the world anymore and guess what? IT'S ALL MY FAULT! *wibble*
..you forgot Wagner....
stonks

Drunk neighbour fell over his gate and screamed to the taxi man it was his effing fault coz he parked too far up the street....taximan got out and they had a barney, taximan went to go back to his car and fell and it escalated til drunk neighbour laughed and taximan agreed it was funny and drove off.....boriiiiiiing. 

Anyway back to the hate.....I hate that the snow effed up my night out yet my mother still managed to get herself to the pub and rang me to gloat!

Ells
Reference:
Drunk neighbour fell over his gate and screamed to the taxi man it was his effing fault coz he parked too far up the street....taximan got out and they had a barney, taximan went to go back to his car and fell and it escalated til drunk neighbour laughed and taximan agreed it was funny and drove off.....boriiiiiiing.
That sounded quite exciting to me 
Prometheus
I hate Jamie Oliver.... He is a pretentious little know it all. I hate his fake " ordinary man of the street" personae. I hate the fact he  rattles on and on about simple food and yet none of his recipes are really that simple.
I just loathe him - and at the moment he is in the Sainsburys adverts which are the worse adverts on the telly.

I also hate big lorries on narrow country roads  - selfish twobs.
FM
Reference:
Drunk neighbour fell over his gate and screamed to the taxi man it was his effing fault coz he parked too far up the street....taximan got out and they had a barney, taximan went to go back to his car and fell and it escalated til drunk neighbour laughed and taximan agreed it was funny and drove off.....boriiiiiiing.
..now thats funny....

Reference:
I hate Jamie Oliver.... He is a pretentious little know it all. I hate his fake " ordinary man of the street" personae. I hate the fact he rattles on and on about simple food and yet none of his recipes are really that simple. I just loathe him - and at the moment he is in the Sainsburys adverts which are the worse adverts on the telly.
It facinates me how he puts on weight everytime his wife gets pregnant....
stonks

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