My little one has asked a few times why I'm laughing so much.  It's not so much that anyone can or can't poo it's the way in which they are phrasing it:

must be like a elephants leg when it appears !!

One of my sons told me he never pooed at secondary school in all his 8 years there!

*dissolves into giggles at 'elephant's leg'*

Lol
Not for the faint hearted though

Well I poo daily...simpers.

Anywhere? 

I can't go in town or in some peoples houses....just depends how well I know them.

i can't ........... * go *    anywhere  lol , i need to be at home   i dose myself with immodium before i go to work   ............. i may have done some damage  as i have took two tabs every day for last 9 years lol   but i am ok at home

That's a relief.

it is  lol  ................ i canny sh.t  just anywhere  

Nope  

They say Inverary is nice though...

Sandra I used to be like that when I knew I was going anywhere strange like a night out or to someones house for a drink.  Immodium were my best friend until this new years when I had taken 2 or 5 to keep me from having to go when I was out visitng fold and I had the worst pains since childbirth about 4 days later.  I swaer my disabled rail (previous tenant) came in handy when I went to 'drop the kids off at the pool'  fcuk me!!  That was something never to be repeated.  Now I hope to never have to go when I'm out and if I'm not in a mates house then I will go home to drop a bomb.

edit:  *note to self: don't post after a bottle of wine* 

Ahhh feck I keep pressing quote instead of edit.....I give up!!! *slurp*

i know how you feel lol 

see u btw   

am away . to the latrine   ,  then baw bawz 

nighty night 

*cantexplainexpression*

Night sandra    

Morning velvet   

Ahh feck I really shouldn't come on here drunk.....my fingers dont work   I meant  DON'T post after a bottle of wine.  Ahh I'm sure yous knew what I meant.  *pleading smiley*

Hi Scotty 

   

in other words i can only shee shee in ma own pan  

I know what you mean, it doesn't feel right anywhere else! But the 2 Immodium a day? How do you manage to 'go' at all? Surely that would clog everything up?

(And I can't believe I am talking about human excrement in a serious manner at 2am on the internet)

Anywhere! I don't care ,in my home or out and about!., Usually around between 10.00 am and 12.00am.

Do you mean talking about human excrement on the internet or actually relieving yourself of said faecal matter?

I mean taking a dump...

I don't like to discuss such things, but I usually deliver before the postman, every day.

I don't mind making deliveries elsewhere, but would maybe try to limit any noise effects, in public lavatories.

that ds thread is funny in a revolting kind of way, but this post  made me laugh out loud..


'' I can't even go in my own house if there are people here.
A couple of years ago, I had workmen in the bathroom. I was so desperate, I was sweating and nearly in tears. I had to do it in my bedroom in a mixing bowl, and then hide it under the bed till they'd gone. It was awful.''

EH??

How is crapping in something you use to cook preferable to going in your toilet?

It's a shit....everyone does them!

I didn't understand that either....

 

If only they'd just called it a bowl, instead of mentioning the word 'mixing'!

It's never bothered me, but I know a number of people who won't do a number 2 ANYwhere except in their home.  I couldn't give a shit TBH.  (No pun intended! )  As someone said before, 'it's a shit,' 'it's natural,'  and it is... so how can anyone be so embarrassed to do it?  It's weird.  I have actually known people even LIVE together and be together for 5, 6, 7 years or more, and they haven't even FARTED in front of their other half, and would certainly not do a number 2 with them in the house.  How bizarre.  It just strikes me as very odd that you're not comfortable enough with each   to even have a wee pump in each other's company.  Or do a dump when you other half is in the house.  Weird.  Takes all sorts I guess.  And as for only pooping once a week!  OMG, I go like twice a day... It would KILL me only going once a week.  They must have such bad guts. 

Sorry, but doing it a mixing bowl?    Hope you binned it afterwards.    I think whoever is in the house, I would do it in the loo rather than in a kitchen utensil...

I'm one of the weirdos who can't go if anyone is around.  I don't mean my partner/kids/family but I do mean workmen or if I'm in a mate's and there are people there that I don't know very well.  I can kinda understand why that one poster did it in a mixing bowl though lol.  I had workmen in doing my bathroom one day and even though the loo is seperate it is about 2 feet away from the bathroom and they'd been in hours working away.  I hadn't ate, had a cuppa or smoked since I got up coz I knew that would make me want to go but the fear of the thought of having to go, of course made me need to go.  My mate online suggested I take the kids potty out to the back hall and do it there.....but that was a bit more terrifying....imagine a workman walking in on that!!  So I waited til my OH came in and persuaded him to make them all come down into the kitchen for a cuppa so as I could poo.  I know that's very strange but the thought of it being a noisy one or one that wanted to take its time really scared me into not wanting to go while they were in.  Don't even get me started about the window cleaner suprising me once while I was on the loo.........that was a tense moment til he finished up and went on his way.

LOL Ella Bella  Not a massive problem for me going at someone else's house... but then I must admit, I don't think I hardly ever need to.  But yes if there are people, like workmen around, it's a bit offputting; I mean what if you do a poo and let out a huge fart. 

Mind you, it's not as embarrassing as what happened to my friend a few months back.... She had someone round to look at why her radiators werent geting hot, and the gas contractor pushed her bed to the side to get to the radiator valve, and unleashed her 7" vibo.    I'm not kidding...  She was so embarrassed that she cancelled her 3 star contract after appointing another gas contract provider, just in case the same dude turned up, or one of his mates, coz you can bet that it was all round the offices within 24 hours.  tee hee.

OMG you are dead right it would have been round the office!   I would have died!  I hate having anyone strange in the house like a workman coz I always think they're gonna move something and a pair of knickers or something are gonna be sat staring at them.  Like when they removed all my old radiators to replace them and there was a pair of old nags, probably older than me behind one of them.....they weren't mine of course but the workman didn't know where to look.