thank you mrs lori.
yes things are quieter now.
the man in the skirt was the worst one for wanting to fight but he came round to see aunty pet and the big man today to say sorry.
he brought a big bunch of flowers for aunty pet and a bottle of whiskas (?)  for the big man.
he said he was sorry he made such a pillock of himself at the party but he gets like that when he's had a "wee dram too much".


 what's a wee dram? is it something you wee in - like a litter tray?


 he wasn't wearing a skirt today. he just had ordinary trousers on.
praps it was having to wear a skirt at a party that made him so cross.
he's called jock. he lives in a house at the bottom of the road with a name on the gate that says "jock's trap". 
i know what he keeps trapped in there.
there are always two little white yappy dogs, like those marguerita  has, yapping at me through the window when i go past.
i just sneer at them cos i know they can't get out.


anyway this jock man has asked aunty pet and the big man to go to "jocks trap" for a party in about 3 weeks time.
 something to do with burns he said.
i hope no-one is going to get burned though - not even those two yappy white dogs.....

a "wee dram" is a drink, LC.  He just means that he gets that way when he has too much of the drinks they were having that night.

thank you mrs lori.
i sometimes get very confused with the things yumans say ....... and do.

it has snowed again today. i can't go out. i've just been sitting inside looking through the window and trying to keep warm.

and with good reason.  yumans are very confusing....and confused.

Sorry you are stuck inside, LC.  I would like to have a little snow where I am, but it's just cold and rainy...

I'd ship you some of ours Lori, but it would probably have melted by the time it got to you.

Little Cat, the 'burns' the man in the skirt is talking about is not burns with a flame, bu t a person. A long time ago there was a person called Robert Burns who wrote poems and stuff and became famous....and now every year near the end of January manypeople have a party in celebration of him.

hi tlc and crew sorry i haven't visited for a while but i have had problems with the internet. Happy New Year everyone

nice to see you again machel - i missed you.
and thank you mrs lori and fluffy friend for explaining things about wee drams and the burns thing to me
i need yumans to explain things to me so i can become a neducated cat.


sometimes i listen to people explaining things to leroy as well and i try to remember what they said
i learn a lot of useful things like that.  


yesterday, the big man had quite a few drinks out of the bottle of whiskas the man in the skirt brought him, and he was talking to leroy about the burns party he had been invited to.
 leroy asked what there would be to eat at a burns party and the big man said they would be certain to have some haggis.


well i had never heard of haggis and leroy didn't seem to know what it was either and he asked the big man to explain about haggis
the big man had another drink out of the whiskas bottle - which he said was really smooth moult.
then he said "sit down leroy and i'll tell you all about haggis".
so i pricked up my ears and sat down too and this is what the big man told us:-


he said a haggis is a wild animal that lives in scott land.
scott land is nearly all mountains and the wild haggises live in the mountains and spend their lives running round and round them.
the wild haggises all run round the mountains the same way round - clockwise - which is the way the hands of the clock go .
so all the wild haggises have both right legs shorter than their left legs so they can run round the mountains and still keep upright and not fall over.
(that seems like a very good idea to me.)
anyway the big man said they have special dogs to chase the poor little haggises and catch them.
the dogs are called haggis hounds.
the haggis hounds run round the mountains in the opposite direction to the haggises so they can head them off and catch them.
the haggis hounds are specially bred for this and they all have left legs shorter than their right ones so they can run round the mountains and not fall over as well.


but the big man said that the trouble is that the haggis hounds don't actually live in the mountains like the wild haggises do and they have to come down to the flat ground at the bottom of the mountains to sleep in their kennels at night (and when they're not hunting) and of course they would fall over with their short left legs.


so the masters of haggis hounds make them little tiny wooden legs to fasten on to their short left legs to make all four legs the same length when they are on flat ground.
these little wooden legs are called "wether-go-nimbles" and are specially made for each hound and beautifully carved by kroftez in the winter.
(he didn't explain what kroftez are and leroy didn't ask that)
the carvings are traditional patterns and you can tell by the pattern which part of scott land they were made in.


leroy didn't look too sure about all this and i saw aunty pet listening and laughing to herself in the kitchen, so i wonder if the big man had got some little part of it wrong.
i shouldn't think so though.


but isn't it interesting?
a little cat can learn such a lot just by listening to a clever yuman.


i still feel a bit sorry for the little wild haggises though.


i'm glad i'm a little cat and not a haggis.

I think he was pulling the wool over leroy's eyes (no pun intended ), LC.  Just in case this is a regional thing, I'll let someone more local than I explain it, but *I* thought haggis was part of a sheep.

yes the big man HAD pulled some wool over leroy's eyes, mrs lori. 
 
leroy had just put on a lovely kriss muss jumper that aunty pet had knitted him.
it DID stay over his eyes rather a long time because aunty pet had knitted the neck a bit too tight and he couldn't get his head through very well.
he struggled and struggled with it and the big man had to help and the big man managed to pull it down over leroy's eyes and ears so he could get it on properly.


i've no idea if he ever got it off again.
praps he'll have to wear it for the rest of his life. 
well we cats have to wear our fur all our lives.


the trouble is that leroy's jumper wont grow with him like my fur grows with me.

Yes, that could go very badly for him if he can't get it off.  Either him or the jumper!

I made a jumper for my husband, and it was MUCH too large, so I washed it in order to block it to the correct size, but it shrunk to a very small size, and now he can't wear it.

Hi tlc and crew, Taylor is a changed cat! when we moved home he went into his carrier and never said a word (or meow) he is usually very vocal even for a 5minute drive but this time he was silent. I didn't let him outside unless he was on a lead, but he didn't want to go out anyway. Its been three weeks and he still isn't sure about the outside, he looks through the windows but doesn't venture out. We have had a visitor - another cat, he lived here but his owners left him behind and now someone else looks after her, (they think!)

poor taylor. i expect he misses his old home ad wonders when he's going back....

tuesday january 5^th 2010

 

it snowed all last night and now there’s really thick snow all over everywhere - and it’s still snowing.
the snow is deeper that i would be if i stood up on my back legs and stretched out my paws above my head.

some of it is a lot deeper than that too, cos the wind has blown the snow into big hills.

aunty pet says the hills are called “driffs”.

 

 leroy’s dad brought leroy to aunty pet’s this morning as leroy’s school has closed because of the snow.

 it’s only been open one day too.

leroy went back to school yesterday for the first day after the kriss muss holly daze and now it’s shut all over again.

leroy’s dad says he’s got to try and get to work because he’s in charge of his dee part meant (whatever that is!).

he’s got to walk there though because no-one can get their cars out and all the buses have stopped running too.

he says that by the time he gets there it will be time to turn round and come back again.

 

when leroy’s dad told the big man he was walking to work the big man said “blow that for a game of soldiers, i’m stopping at home today.”

the big man said he would take leroy out sledging when the snow stopped.

leroy was very excited about that.

 

i heard them talking about the snow and the big man said the snow was a lot worse and a lot deeper in scott land.

when I heard that I got really worried about the poor little wild haggises.

 they’ll all be buried in snow driffs.

what will happen to them?

at least the haggis hounds won’t be chasing them in this weather, so I suppose that’s something.

 

is there any group of yumans to look after wild haggises do you know? – The Haggis Protection Society – or the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Haggises?

 

if this snow keeps up then i don’t think the man in the skirt will be eating a haggis at his burn party.

i’m quite glad about that really.

I think you can adopt a wild haggis if you want to L.C.


Try "Haggis Trust" or "The Haggis Sanctuary."

I think that the SSPCA (Scottish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) has a special squad that deals solely in Haggis.

Especially coming up to the 25th of January, which is the night when people have their 'Burns Night' party.

i am freeeeeeeeeeeeeeezing!

Awww....poor LC. *passes over a nice thick fleece blanket*

We are all getting very excited at our house. We are expecting a guest called Valentine but Les the vet says it will be a while before she comes. The nice perl ice lady is coming at the same time, she says she has a few days off work for Valentines day. Valentine must be very special, perhaps that day is her birfday. Birfdays are when loads of nice people come round and make a fuss of me. They get very thirsty and have to drink loads of wine and beer and I manage to get at the punch bowl when no one is looking.

I love this snow, we all made a snowgirl in our garden. Les the vet won’t let men come near the place-even snowmen! Last year in the snow everywhere I went little yellow patches seemed to follow me. They have come back this year which is really nice of them. I suppose you pussy cats are so busy enjoying the snow that you haven’t had time to call in for a chat. I hope your yuman isn’t too busy to keep the fridge well stocked for our Little Cat. How about young nermal? He must be really enjoying this snow. Digging holes in snow must be so much easier for pussy cats than having to dig holes in hard soil.

 

hello baggie, i'm glad you are coming to see me at least.
nobody else has been near for ages.
i think it must be the snow that has kept them away.
even machel doesn't come anymore on friday with fish.
as for mr tom and nermal - i haven't seen them since they left me to go back home on mary kriss muss day.
i'm worried about them. i hope they didn't get lost in the snow.


i'm fed up with snow.
i've been high burn hating aunty pet says.
i think high burn hating means sleeping a lot.
well there's been nothing else to do. i haven't been able to go outside at all.
all the garden was white and cold.


i tried digging a little hole in the snow once for you-know-what and i dug the little hole all right but when i lowered my bottie to do something in the hole my bottie touched the snow and it was freeeeezing and i ran inside again and used my tray instead.
anyway the snow has nearly all gone today.
you can see the garden again.
perhaps mr tom and nermal might come round to see me now it's gone.


i miss them both so much.

Poor Little Cat. You sound really down and lonely. It’s a bit too slippery to go on the tiles for a song but I could come and give your ears a good lick if Mr. Tom is snowed under. My yuman says she would love to be able to use her tongue like I use mine. I’ve seen the size of her tongue so I know she has no chance. I really feel sorry for yumans, I don’t know how they manage at times.

thank you baggie. you are such a lovely kind doggie.
 i wish all doggie's were like you and then we cats would be so much happier.


i know you've got a nice long slurpy tongue, but it's not the same as mr tom's i'm afraid.
you see us cats have to use our tongues to clean ourselves (you doggies have abaff ). so our tongues are all rough like sandpaper and it gives an little extra something to licking.
a smooth tongue doesn't do the trick nearly so well.
it's very kind of you to offer though.


mind you my ears are never all that dirty really - i manage the cleaning of them myself quite well.
 mr tom's licking is more what he calls "ferra pugh tick*  so i 'spect a smooth doggie tongue might be just as ferra pugh tick - even if it didn't clean so well.


i've just had a look out of the window and all the snow seems to have gone. it's not raining either. i might be able to go out in the garden at long last today.


yippee.

Hi, Little Cat and Bagabones!

Glad to hear the snow is about gone, and you can return to some of your regular activities.  I've brought some salmon for LC, and a nice big hambone for Baggy.

thank you mrs lori.
i love salmon.
perhaps mr tom might turn up to share it with me.
i'll keep half of it in the freezer just for him and nermal, i think.

hello tlc and crew. I must admit I don't come to visit as often as I used to. It is not because I don't want to, i just never seem to have the time these days. I am going to make roast chicken dinner tonight. It is a bit delayed though as the baby has not been to sleep all day and has just had some milk and fallen asleep on his daddy. so then when he wakes he won't want to go to sleep at 7 which is his bedtime, so we will have to have our dinner even later, because his bedtime routine (bath, milk, bed) takes an hour. if we try to skimp on it, he wont sleep. I wish he was more like the pussy cats. they sleep at the drop of a hat! (or indeed on any item of clothing particularly the freshly laundered variety)! I am sure mister tom is fine. he is probably struggling with his internet connection at the new farm. x

Hello? Hello? Can you all hear me? We have been cut off in the snow for ages. No t'interwebby, no if hone, no telling fone  Luckily there was lots of Felix,and science plan at the farm  so Nermal, Jasper and Me have been well fed and kept very warm indoors.
Sorry I have missed everything, speshly my ickle LC *licks ears*

The snow was all the way up to the windows in our special cat room. We couldnt go outside, and most of the time neither could the yumans! But everything seems OK now. We all went out for the first time in ages today. Japser had a trot to the barn to see if it was OK but he came back and said he much prefers the Cat Room now and doesnt want to stay in the barn anymore (Which I am glad for because he isnt a kitten anymore and shouldnt stay out in the cold). Nermal of course has been investigatoring. He has found an old tire and got stuck in the middle bit...he did cry at all but giggled lots When the snow was very deep he tried to go for a walk in it and sunk deep into it so all we could see was the tips of his ears. He giggled lots then too. I am a bit concerned about Nermal...he doesnt seem to be growing! Me and Jasper took him around the corner and examined him to see if there was anything wrong. We poked and proded to see if there was anything wrong with him....and of course he giggled lots.  He is very happy, healthy, and content...but very small....and still looks like a little white fluff ball. Does any yuman know what I can do to make him grow?
Japser asked him how old he was. He thought hard about it and said "One"...I then asked him how long he has been living with me and he said...."One". I then asked him how many paws he has and said......."One...and one...and one...and one. So One!" Its the right answer I suppose

wonderful !

mrs belle and mr tom have arrived now.
i was getting so lonely and now everyone has arrived.


i was just going to bed too - it's been a long day.
help yourself to some of mrs lori's salmon for your supper mr tom.


i'll talk to everyone in the morning and advise about human kittens and nermal and get my ears licked some more - but now i need to get some sleep.


goodnight everyone.


goodnight


.....

good morning everyone.
i feel much better now.
now - about your yuman kitten sleeping, mrs belle  ........ have you tried putting him in the airing cupboard?
I don't see how anyone could possibly not sleep in an airing cupboard.
it's full of freshly laundered clothes and lovely and warm and dark.
airing cupboards were perfectly designed for sleeping in.


it is strange how nermal doesn't seem to be getting any older mr. tom.
perhaps he's just a late developer.

i suppose that with everyone looking after him so well, and you doing so much for him, he hasn't any need to grow up.
he may stay a kitten forever.  


as long as he's happy i suppose it doesn't matter.


come and lick my ears again, please......

Hello L.C. I'm glad you're not so lonely now.

It is a bit of a worry about Nermal though - sounds like a case of arrested development to me.... He's a sort of Peter Pan kitten.

Are you sure nermal is a pussycat kitten. I seem to remember when bagabones arrived, he grew ever so quickly and turned out to be a d.o.g. What if, just suppose, nermal turned out to be a rabbit??? I mean it could happen??? Now try to think animals and humans, what animals are the size of kittens, can only count to one and giggle a lot?????
(oh and Hi artymags, good to see you) (and I am afraid we don't have an airing cupboard TLC as we have a combi boiler in the kitchen).

i wonder if nermal is a bunny rabbit, mrs. belle.  
when mr tom comes back i'll ask him what he thinks.


perhaps we could ask baggie to have a look at nermal and see what he thinks too.
i know dogs are good at knowing about rabbits.
the big man sometimes says to aunty pet - or sometimes leroy - "come on - let the dog see the rabbit".
I never know why he says that because, when i look round i can't see a dog or a rabbit.
 so i don't know what he's talking about really.


but it does seem that dogs can see rabbits better than people, so baggie might be able to tell about nermal better than anyone else can.


we shall have to arrange to get them together.

Hello Belle - nice to see YOU again too.


Hello Little Cat.

I'm not sure that you should ask Bagabones if Nermal is a rabbit.
Bagabones seems to have an odd idea of what rabbits really are.
 I'm just a bit worried that he might start talking about ones he's found in a drawer and that the conversation might start to get a bit - well - unseemly - as it so often does with Bagabones.

(I blame his "yumans")


Best not to mention rabbits to Baggie, I think, L.C.

I am pretty sure that Nermal is a Cat  He goes "meeeow" if you poke him too hard, he likes cat food, and he naps loads. He also smells like a cat. Baggy can come and have a sniff at him to make sure, but I am certain he is a kitty,

I’d love to come and play with nermal. I wanted to play with the rabbits but I couldn’t catch them because they went down a hole to the rabbit drawer. I don’t care what nermal is. As long as he wants to make friends and run round in circles that’s fine with me. If I like him/her I’ll offer him/her/it a lick of my bone. It is probably a perfectly normal nermal just after a bit of fuss.

 

What is a yowl? My yuman was telling Les the vet about a yowl and a pussy cat who went of to pee and see a green boat. That was fine but there were no tiles so the yowl had to sing on a small gator and tell the gator that he loved pussy. That must have made pussy very happy because Les the vet said she ended up with plenty of honey.

 

It's not a yowl, baggie.
yowls are noises tom cats make on tiles. (i think the tiles must be cold for them to sit on so they yowl)
it was a NOWL who went off with a pussy cat - i think

No it was a bowl...the bowl and the pussy cat went to see a beautiful pea green coat....I think it was in Debenhams


Nermal would love to come and play with you baggy, but be careful with him as he is still only ickle.

Maybe they were discussing the fowl and the pussycat. Because cats like birds, particularly chickens. They went to see a beautiful free green boater. It is a type of hat that sailors wear....

Are you sure it wasn't a towel and a pussycat?

The pussycat would need a towel to dry her fur with if she was in a boat.
 Especially if the boat was a bit leaky........