the john james workout dvd | GaGaJoyJoy

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yep here it is..the power packed dvd guaranteed to have your friends and family running for cover...

warm up:........this is essential........lie in bed with your duvet,apply guyliner and face cream......important to keep those youthful looks you know...

legs:.........prowl around the living room carrying a towel......do this for 5 minutes......walk outside....then back in.....walk into your bedroom then back to the living room.....sit down

the face....remember its important to exercise those facial muscles.....so........furow your brow and dart your eyes from side to side for 2 hours........believe me its worth it......you'll soon have the john james look you crave

the mouth......we're getting onto the tough stuff now.......find someone...anyone......doesn't matter who it is..even the postman will do..........now remember.......to do this you must incorporate your facial exercise.......ok ready?.......lets go.........'i don't give a rip'.......'i don't give a flying feck'........'i couldn't careless'..........keep repeating and if neccesary follow your subject around the room......

the abs....lie down with your hands behind your neck..........now lift up.......incorporate those facial and mouth exercise whilst sitting up and down.......you're doing well!

the cool down.....ok find a chair and sit in it......look directly ahead and tell someone you really need to leave the house.......you must say this a hundred times

and rest..........back to bed and your duvet

follow this workout and you'll be a scowling arguementative aussie in no time........the john james workout..teaching people how to be full of yourself in easy steps..buy now.......available at all good rubbish tips......

Replies sorted oldest to newest

FairfaxMember

Spongey

...love it.

Monobrow (Sam is a legend)Member

suzybeanMember

Spongey

I might add a little circuit training to my work out....run back and forth from the DR 20 times telling BB what to do. I don't give a RIP curl

Baby BunnyMember

LMAO

I think more attention needs to be paid to the firming up of the gob area - it looks like a hula hoop that's been soaked in a bucket of water for a fortnight.

And you forgot the post-exercise moose piss back massage treatment - to ensure the spineless curve passing itself off as a backbone retains its jelly-like structure.

The Devil In DiamanteMember

Brilliant! You could have this out in time for Christmas Spongey

Blizz'ardMember 10 years

spongey!

Apparently John James' birth was an easy one, and the midwife assured his mother that there was no damage done.

John James, the newborn, made a note of this and has been claiming to 'not give a rip' ever since!

Former Member

nice one Spongey

DanceSetteeMember

hahahahaha nice one Spunge

of course you will need to wear the proper leotard whilst doing it

Karma_Member

Reference: Bunny

to ensure the spineless curve passing itself off as a backbone retains its jelly-like structure.

Nice one Spongeyroo

The Devil In DiamanteMember

Reference:

John James, the newborn, made a note of this and has been claiming to 'not give a rip' ever since!

Did he make a note or a recording

The Devil In DiamanteMember

Reference

S

hahahahaha nice one Spunge of course you will need to wear the proper leotard whilst doing it

OMG....post of the day!

Former Member

I just hope and pray he comes on here tonight and sees some of this stuff

Former Member

Reference:

.the john james workout..teaching people how to be full of yourself in easy steps..buy now.......available at all good rubbish tips......

Brilliant Spongey

~Lee~Member

Reference:

I just hope and pray he comes on here tonight and sees some of this stuff

*Touches wood it never happens* OMG Skylark don't wish that on us,we've endured him for weeks,we want rid,proper rid,never to hear his wek wek weking eff eff effing ever again,

cologne 1Member Memoriam

Former Member

Reference:

*Touches wood it never happens* OMG Skylark don't wish that on us,we've endured him for weeks,we want rid,proper rid,never to hear his wek wek weking eff eff effing ever again,

SezitMember

~Lee~Member

Feck Orf Airlines is fuelled and ready to depart tonight,no stopovers a direct flight to outer Siberia,he can Wek wek wek all he wants there.

suzybeanMember

DS

suzybeanMember

Reference:

I just hope and pray he comes on here tonight and sees some of this stuff *Touches wood it never happens* OMG Skylark don't wish that on us,we've endured him for weeks,we want rid,proper rid,never to hear his wek wek weking eff eff effing ever again,

hahahahaha can you imagine the bollocking we'd get (from the safe distance of a computer screen)

cologne 1Member Memoriam

Reference:

hahahahaha can you imagine the bollocking we'd get (from the safe distance of a computer screen

you'd have to turn off to get away from it.

FairfaxMember

Reference: LEE

Feck Orf Airlines is fuelled and ready to depart tonight,no stopovers a direct flight to outer Siberia,he can Wek wek wek all he wants there.

he he he

~Lee~Member

Reference:

hahahahaha can you imagine the bollocking we'd get (from the safe distance of a computer screen)

I wouldn't be held accountable for my actions*Strokes laptop,sorry lappy but you'd be at risk*...I'd have a new name for him every reply,starting with Barbie Boy.

suzybeanMember

Reference:cologne

you'd have to turn off to get away from it.

and then log on the next day and still see the posts pop up 'wek wek wek wek wek'

cologne 1Member Memoriam

Reference:

and then log on the next day and still see the posts pop up 'wek wek wek wek wek'

Yep.

~Lee~Member

Just replace the words yackety yack with Weckty wek.

cologne 1Member Memoriam

Lee.

DemantoidMember

Don't forget a nice lie down under the anti-ageing light, where you can absorb the beams and then re-emit them as death rays to all and sundry around you.

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