An elderly lady decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of London's most expensive hotels.
 
When she checked out next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for £250.00.
 
She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. "It's a nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren't worth £250.00 for just an overnight stop without even breakfast."
 
The clerk told her that £250.00 is the 'standard rate' so she insisted on speaking to the Manager.
 
The Manager appeared and forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre which are available for use."
  
'But I didn't use them," she said.
  
''Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager.
 
He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from Edinburgh, Glasgow, and Aberdeen performing here," the Manager said.
 
"But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said.
  
"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied.
 
No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!"
 
The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay, wrote a cheque and gave it to the Manager.
 
The Manager was surprised when he looked at the cheque. "But madam, this cheque is only made out for £50.00." ''That's correct. I charged you £200.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.
 
"But I didn't!" exclaims the very surprised Manager.
 
"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."