Donks..............you nawty!!!!

It's Martha now sprouty.

 

But I know what you mean 

  Welcome to the forum Martha x

 

Do you want to borrow my smiley Velvet >>>>>

I think Martha suits yoo 

 

Ma mates uncle is a cobbler whos trade is mostly size 10+ stilettos if you're wanting for speshul occasions 

 Hi there Triggers

Haha haa! That smiley made me laugh out loud!

Hi Baz  Lovely to see you x

Ladies  

 

Ducky - I don't know where you find them   

 

( I'll be getting that in BB12!  )

 Is this a 'real welcome' ? ............if it is......

 

 

It's a dilemma. What do newbies bring to a forum apart from being new? In what way is that deserving of a welcome? I think we should interview them all first to see if they are interesting like we nearly are before making a decision. Then we should get all cliquey and tell them to eff off anyway. 

What if they're fit they fit in though ?

Yeah - you should interview Jonesy  Prom  

 

I would go with the Callan technique - swinging lightbulb 

 

And then the shooter.

 

Only once did I use the rocket launcher - but that was a particulary diificfult case - came from Guersney  

I will start by asking him 'Who are you (s)' It will probably go steadily downhill from there 

Does that include people who have been newbies once, twice, thrice...etc?

"who are you not? " would nail it.. 

may I just remind one & all that you were all once NEWBIES & although at first we may have thought 'sh!t what have we let into our happy little forum?' upon your arrival. We now converse oh so well - most of the time

I was never new.

 

Even at birth. 

Friggin eck well it's nice being ignored on such a regular basis I must say!

 

Oh dearie, dearie me

How about non-newbies that are deeply irritating?

They are the worst!!!

I think i am a newbie of sorts and am not sure if i should eff off, if someone could let me know what to do because i am in that inbetween state of old member who neglected the forum for over a year and newly returned forum member who would like to try again, i have to add i am not completely against the eff off policy so please do not be afraid to give an honest answer

 stay, it will be fine

Juju I was one of those, my hiatus lasted a couple of years.. But only cos phone technology wasn't up to scratch yet. Thing is tho, I think whether you're old, new or returning, if ya crack is sh*te then no one is going to want to talk to you!

Don`t know about that. I talk to velvet everyday. 

*** refuses to discuss her crack ***   

That's cold blizzie, I feel so ignored

 I'm just living up to my name. 

You're REALly out of order

I might send a pm or 6

 

Hey Karma are you still in Scottyland?  

Ellooo!

 

I didn't get to go cos of stuff and other stuff (wasn't allowed to travel) Bleedin nora I'm watching Dolly Parton on Loose Women - what the hell has she done to herself?

Ah that`s a shame. 

 

Just switched over. Wow!  She can`t move her face. 

 

She's always been good for a bit of work but she looks like she's been stuck in a freezer for the last 30 years Oh Dolly

 

Still it could always be worse, she could be getting ignored and not getting greeted with a hug everytime she takes a slash or breaks wind!