Sir Cliff didn't ave Devo driving bus tho.So didn't ave all the crap and fag ash frum im ter clean oop in t'murning.

Yer be spot on there.Where's Dance bwggard of ter agin?I saw er eyeing oop a blurk that walked passed earlier.

Goin' off wi t'blurks in t'middle of t'bus tour

'appen that's right rude - we've got the only blurk we need - our Lard

Dance, yer a disgrace.

Let me fill yer glass oop agin Miss S while we're waiting,might as well enjoy ourselves like.

That be smashin' looove - same again please but wi a bit o' t'blackcurrant in t'cider ta very moooch

Ey oop lass jurst ad thought.Yer durn't think she's been addicted like by that blurk under Angel ot'North that were watching us climb durn ladder der yer?

Gets Miss S glass ov Cider wit spalsh ov blackcurrant.Yer are lurve.

LMAO !!!

Blooody hell Bo ah just spat me tea out all over t'keyboard

'Appen that's what's 'appened!!! 'E looks like a right t'shady character 'im

Think we should call t'police?

Yer might be reet lass.Can yer remember wat he lurkes like ter give em a good prescription.

'ere's the blighter - look at 'im waitin to pounce on unsuspectin t'posse members

Ah would know him again if ah saw 'im Bo

Gurd fer yer S, cause I bloody wouldn't.I'll git on phone now t'Police Station.

Ahv got a good eye fer t'faces Bo.

Bit like our Lard

Ah watch Crimewatch yer know - ah know the drill.

Gurd on yer S.Police are on way.I can ear sirens in t'distance .No they're going tuther way.We'll jurst ave another drink while we wait fer them S,uno Cider wit splash ov blackcurrant fer Miss S and glass ov champagne fer me please Barsteward.

What's that I ear,there's bin an expulsion int other part ov town.Nur chance ov gettin Police ere soon then.Bwggar.

Cheers Bo looove

God knows what that bloke 'as done wi Dance - mebbes 'e intends ter blackmail our Lard into givin' 'him 'is St Viv booowts fer 'er release

Oxygen tank blurn oop.Blocking roads.

Our lard wilt never give oop them boots.Nurt ter worry til we git random note.
Cheers Miss S.

Yer jokin.

We can't get t'bus through fer a bit then.

Nur durn't think so lass,let's ave another drink then.Barsteward uno cider wit splash ov.Oh he's already poured em.Ta. Ere yer are lurve. Durn't drink sur quick tho,I've feeling it's gonna be a long neet terneet.

Ere's a bobby nur.Ey oop Constible.We think ur friend Dance as been addicted.Miss S knurs what  e lurks like.Tell im S what e lurks like?

Miss S nurs about these things cos she watches Crimewatch yer nur.

Eeeeey ooop constable - 'e were a right stocky blurk yer know wi' recedin' 'airline.

Spoke wi Yorkshire accent, right menacin', like,  yer know.

Ahm sure ahv seen 'im on t'Crimewatch in that rogues gallery wi that guy off Strictly Cooome Dancin'.

Wur right worried 'e's got Dance in t'dungeon soooomewhere.

Constable takes oot notebook and starts writing,or drawing presciption can't tell frum angle like.

Wat blurk frum Strictly Miss S?Yer never told me that like.

Yer durn't mean John Sergeant der yer?

That big burly blurk - Rav - 'e always does ther rogues gallery on t'Crimewatch.

I 'ope this constable is takin' proper notes = this is serious int it?

Well I jurst caught a peek ov a Mickey Moose drawing.

I durn't think he's a proper bobby,more like a Charlie.Oy are yer in fancy dress?

Don't tell me wur've been takin' fer a ride by an imposter 

Clocked im with a picture ov Barbie on t'cover ov notebook,I thought Allo Allo.

We've bin ad Miss S.

Barsteward. Same agin please?

Bleedin conman - 'e's smelt thur booze on our breath's Bo an took advantage.

'Appen we should just get back on t'bus and 'ave anither drink.

Gurd idea lass it be a bloody site cheaper than ere.Takes off  Viv's, starting ter git blisters.Ow abot curry on t'way back lurve.

Eeeee curry sounds grand Bo - make sure ter get some nans wi' it tho.

This lurks a gurd place S.Lets try it."Dai Rea Curry House"

What curry would yer like S.Madras,Korma?Plus Nans .

Yev got ter be jokin Bo - if yer think ahm goin t'risk bein on t'bus lavvy fer rest of t'journey yev another think comin'.

Anyways it's right past my bedtime Bo so ahl bid yer goodnight fer now looove - should be on't soome time the morra tho if yer about.

Let's 'ope Dance makes it back t'bus before then

Catch yer tomorrow Bo

Night then S,I'll jurst pop in ere fer takeaway.See yer back on t'bus lurve.

Ee that barsteward he's laddered me tights!!  All I asked him was to praise t'Lard and he kept on about Nana, I was gettin' reet worried and then Dance disappeared into t'Darby and Joan club and I can't find her now, and me curry was cold

Ee I got t' tights to praise t'Lard in Blackpool, I'm goin' to put me St Vivienne jim jams on and get some sleep  

Devo's drunk again, we won't be praising t'Lard tomorrow.