I love it when they are little...   but there does come a point where it feels like lying.

 

I remember when I was little I was quite old when my parents told me the truth, they assumed I knew he wasn't real and I didn't have a clue.   I remember the feeling of betrayal I felt at the lies.   I was one of the last kids in my class to believe in him, & consequently felt humiliated when I found out the truth.

 

So...  I can't remember how & when the girl found out he wasn't real... but I very much do remember the decision to tell the boy he wasn't real.   He was quite young...  but I didn't want him to make a fool of himself at school.

 

One day after school, during the run up to Christmas he said "So...  everyone lies to us about Santa, so I take it God isn't real either?"    Kinda saw his logic in that one...    

 

I agree with you, Jen.

Yes, technically it is lying but Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy all add a little bit of magic, imo.

My daughter knew anyway but said she was still going to play along as she liked all the excitement, made me go 'awwww' inside i think she was a little disappointed, made me feel a bit sad.

 

Then my son said a couple of days later 'when i grow up and have kids will they have to believe in Santa?'

 

Does the magic make up for lying?

I dunno Jen...    I don't lie to my kids, a decision based on the fact that my parents lied to me all the time and as a result I have no trust or faith in anything they say to me.

 

Mine STILL make me do the stockings...   we still talk about Father Christmas coming...   but they obviously know the score with it all.

 

We've never lied about the Easter bunny or tooth fairy....     In fact we used to joke to the boy that he had to keep his eyes shut when waiting for the tooth fairy...    or else he might catch a glimpse of MrD coming in his room in a tutu & tights! 

I've had a discussion with my youngest (now 23) and he agrees that the magic and excitement outweighs the disappointment of finding out the truth.

Then he went onto a rant about kids ought to have a good time for a wee while before real life catches up with them and they have to pay bl**dy taxes etc etc.

Mental pic there Ditty lmao

bizarrely...   that threat, that was meant as a bit of fun was taken seriously & years later the boy admitted that he thought we were serious & that MrD actually did dress up in a fairy costume when coming to take his tooth in the night 

I agree that it's just a bit of magic and fantasy.  In a way, nursery rhymes and fantasy stories are lies and I suppose very young children might believe that, say, Humpty Dumpty, giants, ogres, pigs that build houses and Iggle Piggle are real for at least when they are very young.

 

This gets on to religion, if religious parents can teach their children about talking snakes and donkeys without pangs of guilt then they should manage Santa for the few years.

 

As long as they don't still believe it by the time they're 13!

 

 

 

hahahahaha!!

i like the magic of children believing in santa, but i always told my children around 7/8 years of age and they always played along with their siblings, they liked being part of the secret

Mine did too, Machel. The eldest and middle sons never spoiled things for their younger brother(s).

It is bizarre that fully grown adults can believe in God, but kids can't believe in Santa/Easter Bunny.

My oldest turned 10 right before xmas and still believes.  It's not LYING to kids it's letting them have that magical time in their lives before the harsh reality of life sets in so no, I don't feel guilty for it at all.  Some might think 10 is a bit old to still believe but I'm happy to say that my son and most of the kids he plays with are innocent kids who don't get into much trouble and aren't out terrorising people so letting him hold on to that innocence til now doesn't make me feel guilty in the slightest.  The majority of kids in his class also believe so it's not as though he's being teased for believing so I don't see any harm in it.

 

He knows the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy aren't real so naturally he'll ponder whether Santa is real aswell so if and when he asks me the dreaded question I will tell him the truth.  Then it'll all turn from believing in Santa to BEING santa for his little brother so I'm hoping that's enough to make him keep the secret for another while.

Believing in Santa is part of the magic of Christmas. Once kids know there is no such man, part of the magic dies. I kept mine believing until they left junior school as I didn't want them to feel fools at secondary but I felt sad at doing so because I loved the magic for them, the excitement of Santa bringing them their gifts. I don't think many kids will feel they have been lied to as mine understand it was to add to their excitement and not lies for malicious reasons.

 

I suspect my son stopped believing when he was quite young and he says he went along with it for my benefit . When he was about 5 he asked me; "If Father Christmas was alive when you were a little girl, Mum, how come he's not dead yet"   

Awww, I am so pleased that people here are all for letting kids believe as long as they can.   I read a post on ivillage once from a woman who said she told her daughter 'the truth' at the age of five!  And she said 'you are all deceiving and lying to your children, and that it is basically bad parenting to LIE to them.'  

 

I think it's a little bit of magic that does no harm, before the harsh reality of real life sets in.  My friend said her daughter believed until she was 15!  I think she may have been too afraid to tell her mother that she no longer believed LOL.  I think most kids by the age of 15, would realise that Santa is a myth.  

 

were you 15?

I use to think Mary Poppins was real, and my parents would play along. So much so that I would deliberately untidy my room and wait for her to fly down, click her fingers, and tidy it back up.

 

It never happend. Mum said she was probably too busy, so i had to begrudgingly tidy everything back up.

 

I did try clicking my fingers a few times though 

Omg no! At 15 I was way way past the Santa stage I can't remember how old I was but I do remember thinking back to the times at school I'd talked about Santa and the knowing looks that had flashed between the other kids. I really resented the deception.

I think I must have been one of the first in my class to find out.

 

Not sure what age I was but it was pre-p5 anyway.  My sister (2 and a half yrs older) was throwing a right wobbler when we were leaving my Grannys one day and my Mum walked on in front of her but this made her throw an even bigger tantrum and she walked up beside me and said in a low voice 'Santa isn't real, me ma and da buy all the presents and this year you're getting a red bike coz I seen it'  

 

Got up on Xmas morning and saw my new red bike and knew she was right.  Xmas was never the same after that. 

awww Ells

 

I loved Father Christmas when the kids were little. He used to bring the stockings and we bought the presents under the tree. We still have stockings, and the kids still sit on our bed to open them (they are 22,21 and 17!), and we still get all surprised at how Santa has made such good choices!

 

My eldest two asked me if the tooth fairy was real, when they were about 9 and 8. I confessed not, then they asked about Father Christmas. I couldn't lie, so I had to tell them the truth even though it saddened me to.

My daughter knew from about 8, can't remember her asking me if he was real or not she just used to say *mum its you that buys my presents* 

 

I used to love holding her hand and creeping downstairs to see if santa had been awwwwwwwwwwww

I know 

 

I remember the first year I did the flour footprints to & from the stockings & pressie pile round the fireplace...  

 

Ickle stood half way down the stairs...   saw it all and screamed "HE'S BEEN, HE'S REALLY BEEN!!!" 

 

Almost as good as the Xmas morning the boy, upon seeing his big pile of pressies (it was a good year)...  coming out with "well butter my rump & call me toast" 

My mum and dad weren't very creative when trying to explain Father Christmas to me, and I was notorious for asking a lot of questions:

 

Me: Mum, how can Father Christmas come in our house when we don't have a Chimney?

Mum: He uses magic.

Me: What kind of magic?

Mum: Erm...his own special magic...

Me: What does it do?

Mum: It lets him in the house.

Me: How?

Mum: it just does...now go to slee...

Me: But what's it called?

Mum: what?

Me: his magic spell. What's it called?

Mum: Erm...The Magic...erm...Santa Magic

Me: Whose Santa?

Mum: GOOD NIGHT DAVID!!!!

Ickle never questioned any of it...  how he got in, why the snow (which was flour) didn't melt & I had to hoover it up, how the reindeer got in & chewed on the carrot..  

I can remember daughter asking for a drink to put out for santa and i gave her a can of lager and she turned around and said *oh mum he likes the same lager as you*  as she got older she'd say *don't forget to drink the lager before you come to bed* 

My two believed in Father Christmas and the Tooth Fairy until they were about 6 or 7. Didn't hurt them. I prefer to think of it as a bit of magic as Yogi says rather than lying.

They're only kids once, why not let them have a bit of make believe and magic while they can

haha - that never even occurred to me, let alone my kids

I love it when they're little at Christmas. 3 of mine are too old now but the wee man is gonna have a great time. I don't see any harm in it. I'd rather tell them a fairy tale than let them watch Tellytubbies 

That's how I feel about it.  Boy Cinds was around 10 when he realised the truth, but it's just lovely the excitement of it all when they do still believe.

I think the magic is wonderful and should always be encouraged in the little ones.

 

I found out the truth aged 7, when a primary school teacher decided to tell us the story of Saint Nicholas. Some of my classmates got upset because they then thought Santa had died Can remember my Mum storming up to the school and giving the teacher a piece of her mind!

 

It didn't affect me too much, I went along with the fantasy and tried to forget about my stupid teacher.

I've never stopped believing

Ha Ha Kat. However, St Nick did exist, and he did leave secret presents, so that's good enough for me to keep the legend going (Perhaps not 'til 15 years though)

Awww

And I have it on good authority that he doesn't like being called Santa - he much prefers to be addressed as Father Christmas

Haha. I remember a scene in Buffy where Anya reveals that Father Christmas is real much to the bewilderment of the Scoobies.

 

Except he comes down the chimney to eat kids rather than bring gifts