first time ive EVER wanted to be in the sally army

i posted this on another thread but i thought it was soooo funny i decided to give it another outing..

After being escorted out of KingsCross station with concussion Im begining to think my Hogwarts acceptance letter was a hoax

EARN £££s working from home by standing next to your toilet charging guests for soap & towels to wash & dry their hands

Sally Bercow should fit in she's use to a house of commons

going to the pub now cos no-one is talking to me

Awww pirate 
Not sure if i am going to like her, but i do like the fact she has her own mind and doesnt let her hubby rule her 

Even his own party don't like her hubby.

I would prefer her to win also.

My wife has left me. She said I was too obsessed with The Monkees.

I thought she was joking but then I saw her face........

and now i believe her.........................

LOL GJ

I think I may very well become a Sally fan.... early days to judge yet though 

luv it

she's all sorta stern and wouldnt take no crap off you

mind you sounds like the OH..but taller

i like her

and wish to marry her

and move into the grace and favour apartment she lives in and be 'snapped' in a bed sheet

ive already told her john bercow is too small-told her im a 6 footer

strangely enough

she added me as friend after that

NEWSAGENTS. Help pensioners feel young again by placing copies of 'Puzzler' on the top shelf

im starting a small group called 'the sally army'

join me if you want to be in the winning team

one in the eye for the daily mail

*nods*

EVAN DAVIES. When presenting 'Dragons' Den', look slightly to the left. That's where the camera is

if anyone is interested i shall be handing out numbers

i wont be number one

i'll be number two-as im shit at organising

SUPPORT Jessie J in her quest to 'forget about the pricetags' by downloading her album for free on a torrent site.

Because I love her so much last night I dedicated a poo picture to her.

can we have a pic please?

ps your number 1

yes i know its you're

just keeping you on your

toes

No. I cannot provide a picture as the wardens came this morning to wash it off.

ok we got numbers 1 to 2 sorted

who wants to be number 3?

and

bollox its raining i was just off to a BBQ

think i might go to bed

its a bit early

What am I number 1 in; poo?

im going for a take away

starving- i had a hot cross bun for breakfast at 6am

hot cross bun in august!

thats wrong

Was that even an answer?

err..nope..got food on my mind..

What do you know about the off side rule my man?

lamb and spinach madras, naan

and

a

side order of sally i mean salad

byeee

lol

nothing

my old man tried to tell me

i was like 'urr?'

loadsa people have tried to tell me

dont understand it

sorry

ordered lamb madras-they have NO lamb they offered me beef

i quickly turned it down-ordered chicken

and left the room

ahhhh..

sally...