Oh If only I had loads of friends who could be my agony aunts (I nearly typed c there, good job I pre-edited!)

Hahahahahaha! Deman!


I was sweating then I thought youd found a video of Sodam and Gomorrah!

Thats like me, i proper quote from the bible regularly im very god fearing

 I want to be your agony c aunt

I bet you rip pages out, underline paragraphs and post them though peoples doors dont you....i know your type  *taps nose*

That's lovely really, but I wouldn't want to burden you Trollop  *gently weeps*

Anyways, catch ya later matey x

Karma you can burden me anytime


I'm waiting for you back to get better so you can kitchen dance

NO i only do tht for you other plebs get heat magazine through theirs underlined

trollops a shit agony aunt he just cackles at you

....but its a warm cackle....straight from the heart

Yeah I know

Wasn't that where the righteous bloke refuses to hand over his male guest to be involuntarily rogered by the maurading crowd and offers his daughter to them instead?  What a star!

hmmmm

If I were an X-man, I'd want pillar-of-salt-turning powers.  I'm quite good with a told-you-so anyway so a quick zap too would go down a treat!

Thats the one! But wasnt the male guest an 'angel of god' or some such like?

Yep.  But did Lot actually know that then?  *scratches chin thoughfully*

You like that story dontcha! All hot and bothered Gyps? At the thought of being passed over to the maurading crowd?  

well who wouldnt

I cant remember....long gone are my days of singing in the choir! *scratches bum excitedly*

You...YOU....come sit by me

why whatcha gonna do

Get Dan to turn you into a pillar of salt

i knew it

I don't like to say this but I think those two angels got the wrong Lot.  Look!

"Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him ⁷ and said, "No, my friends. Don't do this wicked thing. ⁸ Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don't do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.""

Which is pretty bad but look again!
"

³⁰ Lot and his two daughters left Zoar and settled in the mountains, for he was afraid to stay in Zoar. He and his two daughters lived in a cave. ³¹ One day the older daughter said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is no man around here to lie with us, as is the custom all over the earth. ³² Let's get our father to drink wine and then lie with him and preserve our family line through our father.""

Depends who the marauding crowd included. You wouldn't want to surface for air through a pile of bums and find John Sergeant on top of you, for instance..  

Crikey.  It sounds like they're from the especially rough council estate down the road from me!

you killed my dream

Typical night at Gyps house  If I had a penny for every time she got me drunk and tried to lay down with me, as is the custom all over the earth...I'd be rich!

I can see your vinegar face from here

I wonder if they had Diamond White back then.

Puts a new slant on the phrase "having biblical knowledge of"
Old Testament Jeremy Kyle-style..

No I think they all drank He-brew back then?...*goes to google vaseline to see when it was invented*

You must not be envious of your neighbour's goods. You shall not be envious of his house nor his wife, nor anything that belongs to your neighbour.

shutttup i had you over rita sue and bob too X

God, I love that film. Chav-licious!

I'm quite envious of the size of my neighbours todger...does that count?

I like her dad....the man in the vest....

you live next door?

What sort of neighbourhood is that, then? If any of my neighbours have todgers, I've never seen them!