Yeah it was horrible what happened to my friend's little boy. She carried guilt for years cos of it and still does. Even though she's moved on and is married to a great fella and has 2 kids now she's not the same and I dont think she ever will be.

My Nan (all 86 bonkers years of her) think it looks pretty and colourful, she told me that at the height of Beastie Boys fever

  Horrific.

To add to what you and Ika were saying...over Xmas our local paper said Durham cops were trialling head cams to record the immediate aftermath of reports...dunno what happened after that, there's been no follow ups in the paper (that I know of)

If I were the girlfriend I'd be doing my best to distance myself from a murderer.  The NOTW can take a hike - it's neither a story to glorify or cash in on.  If there are any emotional problems to be dealt with, be it due to her actions or his reactions, then I think it would be better dealt with privately and out of the scrutiny of the media and the likes of me, a newspaper subscriber.

Some things, for our own good, need to be put away and moved on from asap.

Domestic violence is a gitty pig of a situation to be in.  I am surprised that anyone would wish to spend too much time rehashing and reflecting on such miserable times.  The healthy way is to remove yourself as faraway from 'Victim' status.....even if that means missing out on a lump of cash and a whole bunch of unwanted notoriety.
Sadly being a victim seems to be in vogue and something to wear as a badge;  in my day (yeah, yeah) it was something that only added to the distress and misery.

As Leccy said, SURVIVOR is my preferred choice of label and even then it's not something that I dine out on.  It's not the sum total of who I am - an it never would have been, or will be.

My bedroom was like a brooklyn subway when I was younger, it was literally plastered in tags I used to get all my mates in to tag my wall (mostly with spraypaint) - I loved it. My mum just shook her head. I'm sure there's a picture of me somewhere with some of the wall behind me, I'll have to have a look for it. The only reason I painted over it was cos the fumes of the spray paint were making me ill! Funny cos I was talking to a mate tonight who I used to knock about with during that time and he was like 'Den, I can say it to you now cos it's 22 years later, but WTF were you thinking with all that crap on your bedroom wall you muppet?'

I can't say I blame her for taking the cash and running, I don't even know if I'd have said that myself a few months back, you live and learn...I'd have said tell the rags to get stuffed...But I dunno, a fresh start with cash to make the fresh start easier. Tek it woman!    (acquaintance in a complicated financial mess with crazy fella has coloured my views)


I wasn't even allowed drawing pins in my room, I could blu-tak on the door (coz gloss is wipe clean) but not the walls!  Oh, Mam, you and your frills. 

Lecs God knows how my mum put up with it, the music, the people in the house, the grafitti....none of K's mates get in here, they get left at the door! I dont want loads of peoples germs passing through my hallway, and especially not using my toilet *shudders*

People of the forum, I can now reveal that Karma is actually Kim Woodburn!

No, she didn't. She was entitled to dump him and move on with her life, without expecting him to get a gun, kill her boyfriend, blind a copper and almost kill her. The only person responsible for Moat's actions was Moat himself. Every tabloid has been writing (and speculating) about it, seems only fair they should pay her for her say.

I'd second that. FGS .......if your life has been literally blown to pieces - wouldn't you just want to take some time out to sort your head out? WHY would your first thought after leaving hospital (and having lost a loved one) would you want to go and sell your story to the highest bidder?
In no way am I blaming her for Moats actions ........he did what he did but ................where is the dignity? perhaps she never had any ................................bloody disgraceful IMO and no respect for others involved.

She's probably had it knocked out of her since she was fifteen.

She has the chance to end all speculation (because there is PLENTY of it) and put her story out there so people know the truth...why the bloody hell shouldnt she make a few quid out of it?







She's endured years of pain and torment, and now has the chance to get a bit of happy into her life with the money the paper will pay her for her story....good on her I say!







I hope she doesnt give a flying f**k if people think it's undignified.

Oh Christ

Again, I wouldn't have agreed.  Despite being one of those eeeevil feminist wimmins some forumers *cough North Eastern flouncers* *cough* so despise and my past training...I still had the hangover of the old school keep your head up. But seriously. FFS, keeping schtum won't get the kid a new frock.  Hang dignity, get you and the bairn safe and away from his dodgy mates and even dodgier fan club Samantha!

For those outside the area, there is a nasty, skin shuddering element that are out to get her.  Eff them all I say, grab the cash then RUN!

Far as I'm concerned, all the people who slag her off - and all the pathetic pondlife who posted tributes on his Facebook page or left flowers at his death site - can all eff orf and die. she's the one who had to put up with the bastered, almost got killed by him and lost her fella in the process.
SHE is the victim in all this. He's not some kind of hero outlaw, just a violent scumbag who got what he deserved. If she needs money to piece her life back together - and the tabs are making enough money out of this story - why the hell not get her share of it?

Her kids have been through enough. A nice six figure sum will help them through the tough few years ahead. Lord knows they need a little bit of light in the darkness.

Will just say one thing- All the folk involved with this horrendous act have their own conciences to deal with. Good luck to all concerned and RIP to the Victim and good luck and best wishes to the copper who was blinded in one eye.

When you put it like that I can almost see the sense in it. However .....................surely after selling your story to the press you become more of a target don't you?

Have to say ........hands up I've not read the story nor seen the papers but ...................annoyimity(sp) (I've had more than a few)  is surely better. NOTW is never good is it? One pay out but ..................you have to live with the noteriety all your life.

I was was filling the car up earlier today and noticed a headline on a redtop (dunno which one) "I regret lying".. and some sub text saying it was Moats ex girlfriends story....  

As I was queuing inside the garage to pay... I glanced out the window and a woman in a car was gesturing away... I realised she was trying to tell the bloke in front of me in the queue something...   I didn't give it much thought.

When I had paid & came out onto the forecourt again... the bloke was walking back towards the garage & his Mrs was shouting from the car "the one with that slag saying she regrets it now"...  he then went and picked out one of the papers with the headline...

The ONLY redeeming thing I can say about this woman was she had the decency to look a bit ashamed when I looked at her, with my lip curling in disgust... I think I possibly tutted.

I muttered "fecking scum" as I unlocked my car!

Honest... I couldn't believe what I was hearing!!    I knew about the facebook sites... I have been around people that have this "them & us" mentality about the police & establishment...  but never have I known it be deemed so ok for a bloke to go and shoot innocent people, ruin so many lives...   and for it then to be seen as cool to blame it on the woman!

scum!!!  tis the only word I have to describe them!

She has no need to be anonymous now - the fecker's dead, so there's nothing left to be scared of. The red-tops knew who she was anyway, and no doubt would have written stuff about her with or without her consent. And after all the stomach-churning outpouring of sympathy for him on Facebook, I truly believe she deserves to have her say.

Soozy.... with the facebook groups and the ever growing mob mentality.... she has got to get as far away as she possibly can anyway.

Its getting to the point where there is a glory bounty on her head!

Also...  if she hadn't given them the story.. the papers would have printed their own version of events... from some "source"

Jesus, Ditty ... I've have maybe stopped short of lamping the bitch.
WHY is the woman always blamed (girlfriend, mother) when some nutter runs amok? Disgusting and very frustrating.

well ..................I've not watched the News nor seen the papers today .............living in my own little world. I'll catch up tomorrow ..............at the moment I still think - if it were me .......................I'd say nothing .....................the guy is scum - let the chavs on facebook say all they want. Silence is golden IMO. I don't think I'd have taken the bait.

I reserve the right to change my opinion when I catch up with the real world.

Honestly Soozy a few weeks back I would have agreed with you completely,  I would have said keep you head down, your dignity in tact...tell the press to get stuffed and get on with your life.  Don't rehash it all coz then it's in print forever....DESPITE thinking that she was innocent and HE was totally to blame.  But now, I know a few women who, literally, £500 quid could change their entire lives, not in a "get a nice new carpet, or, my life would change coz I'd have a nice garden shed"...but in a total...FREE way.

I thought I knew, but a family member is good mates with a DV refuge worker...tbh I've lost a lot of principles I once had    I honestly, seriously thought...I've read this book, I've done a counselling course (I knew I was a terrible counsellor btw, never pursued it )...I know this and that and the other.  Now? I'm just...bugger it.  Do what it takes!

And of course, you all know (OP included) what he was in jail for? It was for assaulting one of his and his girlfiend's KIDS. Some fecking Facebook hero.
I heard the woman who posted the original tribute page took it down after the police sat her down and told her what he'd actually done.

I have wondered whether she thinks that by saying she regrets it she can disarm some of the hate being thrown at her...    I hope that's not her aim... cos if this woman at the garage is anything to go by its just going to make them worse.

I can't get my head round the lack of empathy...  have they not thought how they would feel if it was someone they loved that had been shot?

he had a social worker (who he told he wasn't coping) he was in prison in the 1st place for assaulting a child.... Heartbreaking all round./

Yes it is. But at the same time, it was HIM who did it, not his GF. It really depresses me - is there a single fecking thing that blokes do that some woman doesn't get blamed for? I'm quite sure that if his GF had done all this, people wouldn't be sitting here now and blaming bloody Raoul.

Couldn't care less what the woman does to be honest.

What does concern me in this and other domestic violence situations is that one more tut-tut in her direction is one less tut-tut in his and they soon mount up.

i'm more interested in the psychology of people who want to heap blame on the victims/survivors of such crimes, what have they got to hide?  What is their motivation for doing this? Does it make them feel better about their own situations/behaviours if they can somehow justify the behaviour in others?

Goes back a long way, Dancey. I remember when they got the Yorkshire Ripper, it was all about how his missues must have known/must be to blame. And if not her, then his mother. Freudian shit - anything a man does wrong can be traced back to his mum.

Absolutely, I hope my post didn't come out as a cop out for him, just more that the authorities were forewarned of his feelings, and NO ONE took her seriously..when the feck are women going to be believed without having to have car-crash type injuries to be taken seriously!

And the same with Ian Huntley. He murdered two 10-year-old girls, but the wave of hate meant that Maxine Carr had to change her identity. If in doubt, blame the woman..

Hopefully, the poo is really going to hit the fan - the prison warned Durham Police that they were powerless to keep in in for longer, but that he had made threats against his GF's life. Not only did they not protect her, they didn't even tell her he was coming out. Scandalous.

I possibly haven't read back enough and haven't read the newspaper stories .................all I'm saying is - surely to God she'd have been better off saying nothing and keeping her head down.Why on earth would you want to up your public profile and stoke the embers of the story? It'll be chip paper next week..

I'm fairly sure if it had been me I'd have kept my head down .......crept quietly away and let it all die down. Why add fuel to the fire?

To add, I think she may have been injured badly from what I've heard...and even then...no one who should have took her seriously... so women who just have the constant daily grind without the smashed up drama are fecked as far as the media/society/Durham police care.  Gah!

ah Freud,,,,the original denier of the abuse of women. 

Much of his theories arose from the fact that he couldn't believe the frequency of stories of abuse that he heard from his female patients ...had to find a way to explain it in terms of female "hysteria" or mental illness instead.

always wondered what psychology and society might be like now if he'd accepted their stories on face value

"hyster" is Latin for womb, and educated types used to think mad behaviour stemmed from having one
With Freud, it all boils down to his "penis envy" rubbish. I don't think he ever asked a woman if she wished she had one, or if he did, he misinterpreted the answer!

Even worse when it's the mother of said nutter who totally ignores their child's issues and lays blame at everyone else's door. Supports said nutter by putting up 5 grand bail surety to let them roam the streets again and cause even more misery to their victim/s. Oh and then mother claims no responsibility whatsoever for why their child is the way they are