Just wait to see what i send you for Xmas.

Thanks Karma You will be getting a nice Xmas prezzie this year.

Which grottos do you go to?

Some of them bloomin Alpha's probably  Still if they have the effect  

Just everyone get shut of the gas fires   Having to pick locks nowadays takes up precious time.  

I want da Clooney filling my stockings, thank you!!

Didn't know so many had chastity belts nowadays

Your wish shall be granted.

i don't want him dressing up in my gear

Who do I want in my stockings for Christmas? Well, anything with a pulse is a good start. There's a recession on ffs!

Get yer coat Karma---- you've puled.

If that's the best I can do maybe I should put cataract on my Chrismas wish list too

Sharpens pencils for Karmas wish

Thanks

Karma I can something better for you I'm sure

*** books chimney in for a sweep, sharpish ***

Looks as if they have got lead in their pencils

Har har! at this thread.
Oh and the rabbits have got clean bums this morning.

For Blizzie 

Thanks Cinds!

I think.

I found this one, but I would have had to draw the stockings on and I couldn't be bothered. 

That's OK.

Just send him over. I'll provide the stockings!

No-one's ever caught me at it, but I used to HATE hearing my parents humping away in the bedroom next to mine when I was a teenager 
It used to make my dressing table mirror rattle

Lucky mother Deman!

Urgh, don't

 Deman I too went through the torture of having the bedroom next to the oldies.  I remember one night hearing 'bang bang bang etc etc' knowing fine well what they were doing.  Any way next morning I said to Mam, 'what was all that banging last night?'  She said 'I was reading it must have been the head board banging when I turned my page'.  'You're a fast reader' I replied and walked off.

I was fortunate never to hear my parents as they were catholic.

Do catholics do it quieter than us rough protestants?

PMSL

No idea Cinds.  This topic has 2 of the 3 subjects that are often contentious issues for discussion.  "Never discuss sex, politics or religion."

Do we have any politicians on this forum to complete the trio.

Thinking about it, my humping parents were younger than I am now, at the time
Still no bliddy excuse

A girl I knew at school came home and found her mothers dildo stuffed down the back of the sofa. She went ape and left it on the gas fire with a note stuck on it threatening to leave home....

Did it melt?

It still looked quite warm before it met the gas fire

Go on then! I'll have a go. In keeping with the previous comments....



Catholic women tend not to have headboard banging rough seccs when they have fallen to the Communists.

I thank you! *bows* A bit more time and I would have made it into a haiku.

Catholics only have sore knees from praying.

My Catholic mother was often in Labour?

Catholics have more secs than anybody. Every sperm is sacred, and all that.
Do you remember Watty's "noisy shagging neighbours" thread? In it, I recalled that time I had a rutting couple in the hotel room next to mine in Ireland. Jeebus, that was a trial...

Oh lordy!!111!