Of course it is! Unfortunately the 'dear left behinds' rewrite what the 'dear departed' would really have wanted, and usually they haven't really got a scoobie, but have to blame somebody rather than themselves, for their bad judgements. The deceased are hardly in a position to correct the wrongs, so the 'chief mourners' get it all their own way......they think! 

thank you all  its next wednesday and me and my dad are definatly going, we are both hoping my bro  changes his mind  , i'm scared he might regret it if he does'nt

Big hugs lexie - it'll all work out

You're doing what you feel is right and that's the main thing

thanks again everyone   btw this has really affected me , i'm really greatful  for the feedback  xx

Sorry Madamski, I've only just seen this thread - before reading all the posts I thought you should go with your instinct and go.
Hope it all goes well next week and that your brother changes his mind

thanks 

Good for you hun   ..... hope all goes well for you and your dad next wednesday

hya ,  wee update ,  i'm going it alone morra , my dad says he's not up to it , and my bro is sooooooo under the thumb  i have warned him not to come crying to me , i am going to show my respects

I am so pleased you are going madamski. You only get one opportunity and if you miss it you may regret it for ever. You are going for the right reasons.
You have my sympathy and my best wishes.

Hope all goes as well as it can tomorrow - I think you're doing the right thing and wil be glad that you went.

Just to say ... thinking about you today... and hope it all went as well as these things can.

madamski.

hya all , i must say i'm very relieved i went today i was warmly welcomed and it was a very bittersweet day full of tears and laughter , thanks for all your good wishes

Awww that's great Madamski..... glad it went ok

Thanks for telling us madamski. I am glad it was alright.

thanks brisket  , i'm really glad i went it has helped me in dealing with her loss a lot i really would have regretted it if i didnt go

That`s good madamski

I am glad all went  well

I'm pleased it went well for you, Madamski, your instincts were right.

That's good madamski

Lexie

The girl done good!  Hope your dad's ok.

Pleased it all went well madamski, I'm glad you went and had nothing to regret later

Glad you did the right thing, there's nothing worse than regret.

Really pleased it went well for you, was thinking of  you a few days ago wondering how you were getting on.