Pardon my typo Izzy, I'm still getting used to this silly auto spell! To think that the salesman told me it would make my life easier too

Pah- critics! Who knows why they do anything, perhaps they're just jealous of my long line of 120+ best sellers, or bored of their own insignificance to the world of literature, darling
One critic once gave me a bad review because she was envious of my red sparkly limited edition, sold out, brogues. Pathetic I tell you

But, darling,won't the bad reviews affect your sales?

It's not true! I would never hurt Captain Slost! Well, not unless he asked me to Anyway, I don't own a gun and I haven't been anywhere near Dr Manoeuvre's cabin

Downs 10th glass of Crabbies and swings from the chandelier.. 

That depends on the quality of the design Miss Twisty.  One day I will design a flying machine that even you can fly  

Hic!

Ms Airhead! You killed the good Captain because you were obsessively in love with him and he rejected me  err you!

you are such a plank Mr Hatpin *giggles*

Darling, I'd put that away before Ms Airhead spots it and tries to smother it in mustard.

Throw's peanuts at everyone and does somersaults on the bar...

Guten Abend dear people   apologise for my lateness but I am still suffering from ze 'edache last night and now my ears are sore from ze loud booming voice of Herr Fry 

Originally Posted by Izzy Gonyett:

Originally Posted by hagatha twisty:

Pardon my typo Izzy, I'm still getting used to this silly auto spell! To think that the salesman told me it would make my life easier too

Pah- critics! Who knows why they do anything, perhaps they're just jealous of my long line of 120+ best sellers, or bored of their own insignificance to the world of literature, darling
One critic once gave me a bad review because she was envious of my red sparkly limited edition, sold out, brogues. Pathetic I tell you

 

But, darling,won't the bad reviews affect your sales?

 

 

Did you want to say something, Mr Fatpin?

*sticks the megaphone right next to the Docs ear*

Where the bloody hell have you been?

I've been looking for you all night! I have a theory that's even betterer than my Heliwhiz invention!

I think you bought a gun onto the ship with the sole intention of killing poor dead (and seriously starting to get smelly) Captain Slost.  

I know I said I could make it easy enough for anyone to fly. But it may be a stretch for Leo. He genuinely is JUST a pretty face that one. 

Ah, Miss Shaker, Did you have any plans when the ship reached it destination?

Grabs megaphone back

10 more Crabbies Mr Barm thingy!!

*visibly pales* Ich brauche einen Arzt   oh I am a doktor so physician heal thy self 

well it's true zat I may have brought zat gun onto ze boaty but I swear on ze Kaiser's life zat it was only to scare ze Kaptain not keel him 

I vill zay zis - my gun was stolen ja! stolen from my kabin earlier today so perhaps you would be so kind as to find out ooo stole my gun 

do you zink you are on a promise wiz Frauline Fanny? Filth!!! 

Dear lord above, if only your publishers were here now darling! They would be able see exactly what the problem is with your books.

Why were you trying to scare the Captain?  That's really not a sensible thing to do when he has a 50,000 tonne vessel in his hands. 

I'm going all the way your highness

I shall be making a bee line straight to the nearest theatre and making them give me a staring role!

I guessed

Izzy, pish posh! I have a huge, loyal fan base I suppose a few readers could be put off by the odd bad review, but there are so many of them that losing a few here and there really won't make much difference to sales. Besides darling, it's my publishers job to worry about that

And just how far would your publishers go to keep your 'books' at the top of the sales charts, darling?

Looks at Willet and gets great idea for a film about nutty people in an aeroplane race... Hmmm Those magnificent men in their flying machines 

by my dear chap that Kaptain was a scoundrel ja!  a bounder - he told another doktor about some techniques I had invented   Zis Doktor Stomachpunch is now passing my invention off as iz own  

I just wanted to remind ze Kaptain to keep his flapping lips shut and not to divulge my great inventions ja 

I'm sure you'll do well with those leg kicks Fanny...

It appears Miss Airhead is able to predict the future.

Emily, will my inventions one day make me rich and famous (for the right reasons)? 

From what I saw earlier. darling, the Prince can handle rather sizeable vessels.

I think the polar bear passes her secret messages, darling.

Mmmmmmm (as DI Effing Useless would say).....

So, I wonder who else has been into your cabin then? 

Emily....I think you should answer first love  

believe me as someone of great anatomical knowledge neither as anyfink to boast about 

See, I'm not as stupid as people say, I knew the Herr Doctor had a gun, it was obvious at some point he had it in his cabin

In answer to your question...No

And why would they give a two bit showgirl like you a starring role, darling? Unless you were planning to use your rather tenuous link to the poor Captain, to boost your sagging arse  star quality?

I have never been anywhere near the Herr Doctor's cabin

hmmmm let me ze - zere was Frauline Fanny, Ms Tweety and of course The Princeling haf all been to my kabine 

well not zat I am aware of but who knows