Listerine - yuk !!!

The obsession with giving footballers with double-barrelled names their full name even when on the pitch

 

Alex Oxlade Chamberlain is the latest numpty

Went to B&Q to ask about a broken Hoselock Sprayer bought there a few years ago.

"Do you think that part is meant to fit there and its snapped off with that bit?" I asked.

B&Q staff,

"Oh I don't know - I never designed it"

 

Walking away to hear a woman say to the same guy,

"My Dad asked me to get some compost but I don't know if I should get potting or seed compost"

B&Q staff,

"Oh I don't know - I'm not a gardener"

 

 

I do find the honest of the staff refreshing, but of little use when you need assistance.

 

 

Today, lunchtime. I was walking through the city centre as a bus pulled in a few meters from me. As I drew level with the doors a gentleman alighted reading his tablet PC and proceeded to walk into my path without ever glancing up from his electronic device.

 

Was I wrong in wanting the cup of hot chocolate I was enjoying to find itself all over this chap and his electronic device?

 

 

Yes you were.

 

Hope you found that 'refreshing' 

 

I do, thanks

I do not like to see a sixty year old with tattoos on her tits 

Call me old fashioned but I don't like to see any woman of any age with tattoos on her, er, breasts.
Chance would be a fine thing.

 

I'll get mine removed then.

*goes to check EC's sex(what it is that is)*

 

One great big bugbear of mine!!

*Ponders about asking the sex change question* 

One of the advantages of being out in the sticks. It's very rare anyone with a tablet walks out in front of us. In fact I suspect that they haven't reached the villages yet.

Wonder no more

 

People who put their feet on opposing seats on public transport.

 

 

You use public transport??  !!

 

My God I hate it - only started using it cos of work after years in a car.

It's as horrible as I remember it to be

yessssssssss EC. I could em. No manners at all

Worse

Why do we have plonkers on TV shows (Paddy McGuiness, Caroline Flak, Jeremy Kyle, Chris Tarrant, Stephen Mulhern - I could go on ...)

 

When we never see epic people anymore like,

Jonny Ball, Sue Cook, Brian Cant, John Cleese, Jasper Carrot, Tom O'Connor, Tim Brook Taylor and on and on and on . . . .

 

Yes, I sold my car and use the Tram when I have to. Normally I'm a pedestrian.

How do you get anywhere???

 

How do you shop for groceries?

Int Brian Cant dead?

 

EDIT: nope, still alive, aged 80

NO HE IS NOT

I sent him a birthday card 

Bus?

Taxi?
Feet?

Just cause you sent him a card, don't mean he cant be dead

OMG I 'did' check it out first 

cyclists.........especially those lycra clad morons

 . . . and taxi drivers

 

People who walk straight out of shops and pay no attention to anyone who may be crossing the shop doorway and even worse if they are concentrating on their mobiles.

I did that today -  I really did - sorry

 

I stopped and thought,

"What if anyone had been there?"

 

Sorry

Footballers constantly kicking the ball over the bar

 

I mean w-a-y over !!!

 

Its not rugby FGS

self serve tills at the supermarket grrr

I love them

I love them too. I can get through quicker than queuing to see a human. And you can steal stuff

Being shit at football. (although modern-day really means 1978 onwards)

 

Ugg Boots - let's face it, they are not really boots are they.