PLUS (& I suppose this is where you are in a unique situation)...    as she was in sixth form I had to hand over a lot of the responsibility of her education back to her.

But yeah, at 14/15 I was pretty clued up with what she was doing... where she was at etc.

I suppose...    you may have to hand the reigns over to him early Menty...  he's obviously very able...    and... he's that ahead of the game that even if he does flunk a year... he'll still be well ahead of the rest

I agree...

I agree, some of these kids just aren't ready, and for some of them the cost of failing could be too high.

entrance exams to Oxford or Cambridge Uni.

the only thing I can say about him going there at 16 Menty is.....     I wouldn't be surprised, because of the nature of Aspergers, if they haven't had more than one child like your son attend at such an early age.

I don't doubt for one minute that they must provide extra pastoral care for them (at 16...   someone would have to be parentis locus (an adult with parental responsibility in your absence)...  

I think its worth looking into...  they may be well experienced with it all...  it may (or.. may not) be the way to help your boy maximise the postives of the Aspergers.... while helping him to overcome the drawbacks.

It may not....

but well worth investigating I reckon





Breaks your bleedin heart though bird

There's a bit of talk on the forum about JJ leaving....... he's not is he?

I took my eye off the ball on LF for the sake of Further Maths (and ice cream )

Ickle has attended short courses at Oxford & Leeds uni's...    when she was 16 & 17.   They were treated (in terms of being supervised & cared for) like kids...  I mean that in the good way.

I cannot imagine they would do any less for full time younger than normal students.

Phish Food! 



yeah.... he's gone to the diary room.... and now JJ has been called in...   quite rightly I think he is a bit irked with BB for stitching him up with Rachael & Nathan

Aww... don't let them do that to you Menty!!!! Just ask, ask and ask again.

I know if it was me I'd be gutted if I'd spoken to a parent and assumed they'd understood when they hadn't.

That's even scarier!! He's my baby, my fourteen year old long haired teen, BUT still my baby!!

I know you are all right but it's difficult, we have walked a very long and difficult path with him and I just want him to be ready to deal with the world when he goes. You know it's hard to believe that when he was diagnosed, they told me he would never speak and there was a good chance he would have to institutionalised!! I feel very blessed with my boys and I'm not ashamed to say so.

He was a total knob with Rachel in that task.....but then she was a total bitch to him too.

Neither should have been proud of that little display.

No Just plain old vanilla.

Really!!! They want him to take them at the end of next year!

'takes deep breaths' the clue is in the name really, told you not as bright as my son!! 

Right, lets talk BB, whilst I get over my palpitations.....

Has he left yet....he has not been a good boy over the last few days has he?

Awww Ments!

And so you should be proud, of them and yourself! Sounds like you've done a great job!

Menty...   you have no idea how much I understand!  

I would like to tell you that its ok, ...   but its terrifying (for us... not them... they love it)....

but you should see the state I have been in all year...   frantic to the point of nearly jumping in the car at 11pm on a mid week night cos I have read a suspect status on facebook.... or have had a dodgy text msg from her.

I think this is one of the hardest times for us Mums....  I think its hard for all mums... but especially for us that 'lose' them earlier than we expected.    Just go with the flow for now...  just information find...   and find out the options...    speak to anyone & everyone...    

and....

face each hurdle/challenge when its actually happening.... or you will drive yourself insane.


Menty...  Ickle goes back in a few weeks...   my heart has already started to ache a bit (its actually a physical feeling... I can feel it now)....    for me the anticipation of her going is always worse than her actually going (apart from the first time... then it was rough for a couple of weeks...  I actually felt devastated...   but then it settled... and day to day was ok... as long as everything was running smoothly)

phew.... I was about to get Phish food envy!

The credit is all his Ducky, he treats his Aspergers as something to be proud of, he is not ashamed of it and holds his head high. One of the best things he ever said to me was that if there was a cure he wouldn't take it as he wouldn't be the person he is. I was soooo proud of him that day.

No he certainly hasn't.

I still don't think he's the all evil, devil in disguise though.

He has however, been moved down in my list of people to win. And he is just gonna have to live with that

I LOVE THAT!!! 

I love that he feels like that about it!!!     bloody hell Menty...   he is more mature in that sense that so many teens.....   he likes himself!!!

that is huge!

Thanks Ditty, I'm going to be looking for you in a couple of years, and you just have to keep repeating it's going to be ok, it's going to be ok lol

Bloody hell Menty, you're gonna make me cry girl!

There are some parts of Aspergers that really are a gift if it can be channelled correctly. I've always suspected Duds was on the spectrum somewhere, and it's the very things that used to make me worry, that now are making me proud.

Yes he is, you do realise the reason he always wears a hat don't you.....it's the horns Ducky, it's to cover the horns!! 

Sawwy..... he is lovely though, in fact they both are and handsome as well.......oh yes I AM that Mother you dread on parent teacher evening 

Maybe you're right.... horn IS a word that springs to mind when I look at him

No problem....   I will do just that!

Ducky, (& MrsB, Zaph & James) have all been doing that with me all year!

Ducky especially!

but Menty...  it really IS going to be ok!

(Oh... &...   when Ickle was younger... I could see traits too... only I was under the false impression that girls didn't have it.   but the signs were kinda there...    totally different way of thinking, extremely bright, socially inept.   It took her til about 14, and a very very rough ride to sort the social thing out.    She had a mini relapse earlier this year... but is back on track again now.)

When did it turn from like to letch?  You told me you didn't look at him like that, was it the Brokeback shower scene that changed you mind, was it, was it?

It was quite late on...... it's was the guyliner/shower pic. Dittys fault

bloody hell!   

what with finding out the results are out tomorrow...  and now thinking about her going again soon (not your fault Menty...   I had a wobble at the beginning of the week til Ducky bitchslapped me into not dwelling on it til she was back from holiday)...   I am all manic panic mummy again!

and John James thinks he has problems!

It's very rare in girls, but it does occur.  When my boy started school there were two other children in his class who had it as well, talk about spooky coincidences, all three of them were born within a week of each other and all their names began with J, how weird is that. One of them was a girl but she received her diagnosis much later than the other two because of how rare it is.

Don't make me bitchslap you twice in one week Ditty!

She will be fine, it seems to me that you have got one intelligent independant young lady there, and that my dear lies firmly on your doorstep. You must be proud.

Perhaps she likes it!

tis ok Ducks... I have bitchslapped myself!

I don't want to go to the gut turny place yet!

SO.... I have just taken one of my amitriptyline (zombie) tablets... washed down with the remains of my red wine!!

When that kicks in in about twenty mins I will wobble off to bed!

I had considered that.

yeah!   I am, of course I am!

But I have spent a year having to face up to how dependant I have become on her!     You end up thinking "shit... how the hell did that happen!...   you were meant to be dependant on me!"

I should go to bed soon myself. Duds is gonna want me up early in the morning.

Do you think I could get away with telling him the results don't come out till tea time?

bloody hell!

the boys (dog & hubby) went up to bed about ten mins ago...

I can now hear hubby saying to the dog... in an overly loud voice "don't worry... I am sure Mummy is coming up soon... "


I have been at the beck n call of that bloody dog all day!

Sorry Ditty, didn't mean to make you wobble 

oooh John James IS off!

Do you ahve LF on Ditty? He think he may go

I can't go to bed now

It will sound less like you're fibbing if you say mid afternoon