I vote Slimfern!

Ha! Ya can't do that! 

You have to say what you would have if You ruled the world! 

I wouldn't want to rule the world btw...I like my bed too much 

I'd make greed and selfishness punishable by law,have a thermometer in every house to adjust the outside temp to suit ,rain snow or sunshine on demand .

Hmmm Chocolate would be healthy,

No one would know what a bully was as they just wouldn't exist,

When people are children they will realise its the best time of their lives and enjoy it more!!

Homes would clean themselves

(I like ours better)

..... everyman would have his own piece of string.

(That song was part of our famous string theme back in the early eighties.

See also, "Love is like a piece of string!")

oooh yes! public stocks! 

All rapists to have there 'members' chopped & stapled to their foreheads...just to warn us girlies in advance 

Think I'm beginning to like this game! 

Don't be lazy,there'd be a button to press that would clean the house top to bottom ,you have to press the button.

I like all of that especially the one in bold (get me sucking up to a mod ).

i watched that thing on the news the other night where that woman controlled an artificial arm by thought ............i thought that could be handy - then I thought my head jumps from one thing to another with absolutely no logic - it could be carnage!

Absobluddylutely! 

Bloody typos! that should have read i like yours better!

No no not their foreheads,the I am a p****t will be tattooed there, their bits will be stapled to their upper lip.We'd have someone like the Child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang go around with a HUGE electrified cage for those who harm kids.We'd have islands in shark infested waters where we'd send all the above for life.

Hahaha! you're getting right into this int ya Lee 

My brother used to threaten my children with the child catcher....They don't like my brother much 

What's p****t btw ? 

Oh we'd have real Pinnocchio's,liars nose's  would grow an inch each time they lied,that would last 1 month,habitual liars it would be irreversible.

I like your thinking

Slim one of my brothers used to walk around with my dad's stick he carried when walking the dogs,he used to say Lollipops like the child catcher,poor kids were afraid and to this day have never let him live it down ,btw he was only 6 yrs older than my eldest....P*****t is per*ert 

I'm loving this 

Hahaha!

I used to tell my second son that when he fibbed his ears would go pointy like a mischievious elf!

He would cover his ears and say "it wasn't me!"

I had to stop meself chuckling everytime! 

Arrhhh right gotcha! 

Hahahaha...your Dad sounds a character! 

I told mine and my grandson their tongues would go black.If I doubted something they said I asked to see their tongue.my grandson pre-empts it though,he'll tell us something poke his tongue out then say see my tongue isn't black.

Ohhhhh,there'd be no lingering nasty or foul smells,all would be instantly eradicated .

Hahaha...see! they are getting smarter ! 

ooooh! 'Like' this one! 

Fish can be quite lethal..especially tuna  

My mom used to tell me my tongue would go black too, is that an Irish thing? she also used to threaten my brother with 'bold boy peppers' (chillis!)

Hahaha!

My Mum just used to threaten me with my DAD! 

He never did lay one finger on me though...gentle giant is he 

I like fresh tune, occasionally....Smelly fish,smelly people,smelly everything whoosh, all gone,perfect.

Urgh, hate queuing next to really smelly people  maybe that one should go into the trivial thread

Could be Jen,I must have been told it as a child too and passed it on to my kids.In hindsight my gran had some of the strangest yet funniest sayings,I have a dimple in my chin,not as noticeable now but as a child it was right there and I hated it,I used to constantly sit working  at my chin trying to get rid of it,she told me when I was coming down from heaven god put his finger there and said isn't she just gorgeous.

and the one where the member of staff that you take over from has a lingering 'deodorant' 

I don't do smells at all,I'm bad,really really bad tbh to the point it makes me nauseas .Worst are the maskers,the great unwashed who try to mask them smell with deodorant and perfume,what a nasty mix.

Awwww how sweet was she 

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!  I hate nasty smells!

Reckon my mum giving me all her Avon samples to play with as a child made my schnozzle very sensitive...but Yuck to BO!!...Fried food!! Coffeee!!! 

aww thats sweet

I adored her Slim,she was such a fantastic woman.She also told me though I'd never get a boyfriend because I ate scallions(spring onions),I love them still though.

My house stinks right now! I had garlic bread and pasta at lunch and now my son is sat eating cheese and onion crisps

I was the same as a child Slim,my kids are all very fussy about themselves ,my grandson has inherited his granny's thing for smells too.I like the smell of coffee tbh,that's on my ok list.