Chicken, sometimes life is like that and there will be many who feel the same way and I include myself in that when the glass is half empty. Do you have someone close you can talk to about this, family or a friend? I know it can be a difficult subject to breech, however it'll give you a sounding board and hopefully some input into how to address the situation and move forward.

 

Have you ever been in touch with a doctor and if so how did that go?  Sometimes the time comes when professional advice helps put some perspective on things and again help you move forward.

 

You are young Chicken and you do have time on your side believe it or not. As I've said before been in a few dark places myself but things change and you learn how to deal with things from experience  -  ie. what works for you and what doesn't.

 

Try and sort the pressing matters first and then try to think of new ways to socialize and maybe take up some routine exercise which can work wonders for the old grey matter and mood    Also assess diet and alchohol intake.

 

Tell yourself you are a good person, mean it and believe it and take the steps get yourself right     There is a lot of sh!t in the world and in human nature and it is rather depressing at times.

 

 

Velvet 

 

In the past I have suffered from depression and been on anti depressants. It feels like that again. 

 

I'm just not having the life I want and I am not the person I want to be. Fundamentally there are things about me I want to change but cant and I cant seem to get past that. 

Listen to Velvet , Chicken ....and try to remember , you've been here before and come through it and I'm sure you will again I bet you will find nearly everyone on here has felt like you do at some point in their life ...I know I have ...on more than one occasion ...so you're not alone .... 

Only you will know what these things are Chicken but you've got to start by having some belief in yourself   

 

  Be wary of compromising yourself to fit into some kind of perceived social ideal though - I know easier said than done  -  if the issue is along these lines. The oldest phrase in the book is you can only be yourself but you can work on yourself       Far too much peer pressure these days.

 

Don't be afraid to go back to the docs either if this continues and be up front - it's what they're for.  

 

Wish I could help more - remember the exercise. Inactivity and lounging around doesn't help.

 

Best wishes  

 

 

Chicken It's no bad thing to be on anti depressants if you need them - it's not a fault on your part it is often a 'chemical' imbalance that can be sorted with the right medication.

Do seek professional help.

 

Velvet What an old sweetie you are

 

Chicken ......listen to your Uncle Velvet - he knows what he's talking about.

PrawnCracker Velvet is right - you are young   and time is on in your side. That's a big advantage!

 

Try to be more gentle with yourself  Remember your academic success. Now you're out holding down a demanding job. Its not the life you want I know  But its so terribly hard for young people in this economic climate. The fact you secured a job at all with thousands of graduates unemployed is a huge achievement.

 

Sounds like you need more support? Hopefully you have someone understanding in your life? Please don't think I'm being flippant but Samaritans are fantastic to chat to. One time the advice they gave me, literally changed my life. 

 

And of course you have your aunties and uncles here to open up to 

 

 

^^^ All of that   Look after yourself Chicken

Wise words in this thread Chicken

 

Take heed of them, and look after and like yourself

Posting this link in case its any help to you PrawnCracker

 

http://www.fiveareasonline.com/index.pl

 

 

The NHS prescribe CBT [Cognitive Behaviour Therapy] as well as anti depressants now, but there's usually a waiting list to see someone. Four free  CBT mini books are available at that link [NHS approved]. The longer courses there, you can get on prescription, and are pretty cheap to buy anyway.

 

Please don't be so hard on yourself    

Chicken, listen to Velvet's advice, he really knows what he's talking about.

Maybe you should go back to your doctor and ask about counselling, in conjunction with some anti-depressants? I think you need to talk things through with someone who can make you realise what a nice, decent, bright young man you are.

 

Brilliant advice!   Do what you want to for yourself and don't mind anyone who says otherwise 

Good luck 

 

 

Can't add to the brilliant advice that's been given Chicken, hope you feel better soon and quick sharp back to the doctors to tell him how you feel 

I've only just caught on to this part of the post too. I wholeheartedly agree with Donks!

Have a hug from me chicken
And I echo the above posts, there's some great advice there.

I've seen some dark times myself and to come through them feels so good that it's well worth fighting for.
Go to your doctor, tell him/her how you are feeling and don't be afraid to ask for help. Having a jolly good vent to someone really does help too and if there's no one in your personal life you feel you can talk to, then please do call the Samaritans. They are there to listen, they do care and they will help you.

I'm going to post a quote which I once read that I keep handy, because it's so very true-

"When we open to the truth that there is actually very little we can control other than our own reactions to circumstances, we learn to let go"

Now, don't be hard on yourself, you are only human after all and there's always a solution, you will have brighter days

Chicken, it's all been said ^ up there ^

Hope you get back on track really soon  

Great post  I'm feeling very low at the moment and you've made me think 

Chicken, this is going to come across as hard truths. You post on here when you seem to demand support and reassurance. You are always given the messages you seem to need but have taken no notices of and ignore the care and friendship you are given. It is up to you to heed the advice you've had here over and over again. You never seem to acknowledge that or engage with it. I know the forum will come after me with pitchforks because of my viewpoint. So be it. I'm not on FB so thankfully will be shielded from the hate. 

No pitch fork from me Xochi. Much of what you say is true but I do feel real concern for him. He's young and to suffeer the anxiety he does must be awful and debilitating. I just hope he gets help.

 

I must confess to feeling a bit disappointed when he doesn't come back and let us know how he's getting on but .....I do hope he gets well.

 

Nothing wrong with speaking your mind now and then if that's how you're feeling

 

We're not all the same by a long chalk.

Thank you Sooz. I know you've had your moments too.  I still needed to get my feelings off my chest in the hope Chicken understands he has to be the one to take charge of his future. And take the advice he is given from whoever he gets it. Please do this Chicken. 

Nope, no pitchfork here either my friend 

There have been some fabulously generous posts in this thread and yes, it would be nice if Chicken came back and updated us on how he's doing.  There's no overnight cure, and no one's expecting immediate miracles, but I think we're all mature enough to maintain support for anyone for however long it takes 

Hi Chicken, hope today finds you well. 

I do hope you take on board the great advice given here. 
I can only say, as i have said before, please go to your GP. Yes i know its difficult making the first step. Write down how you feel and hand it to him/her. Please believe me, there is nothing you will say that they haven't heard before. 
Its a hard road, but you have to start somewhere. Life is short, Chicken and now its time to decide the road. Its up to YOU now. 
Always post here, whatever you feel. You dont have to answer, but i think we all know you read the messages. I do hope some replies have given you strength, particularly Velvets 

Hello here 

really obvious you all know whats needed ..and me not having a clue butted IN 

 

Sorry for that ..I just thought It was a new poster ...I hope some one finds peace

 

me and my big mouth ...sorry

Aww ...you're not butting in Frodo ...you can post anywhere you want  

Awww Frodo  don't be a silly sausage    You were only responding to a fm in pain, and any input or advice is welcome.

 

Like Baz says, post where you want 

No no pitchforks Xochi. Its practical advice, in a tough love kind of way. You're certainly not afraid to tell it like it is.

 

PrawnCracker is a young man though... maybe we have to make allowances for his reaction / non reaction. Maybe that's why Velvet [ a male ] understands so well - he's been there and done that.

 

Hope you're ok PrawnCracker - do come back and tell us 

 

Morning all

 

I do sometimes *butt in *not really knowing the facts ,but I never take offence when I'm wrong(always put my foot in It)

 

I have never been treated unfairly on here quite the opposite ...smilies aren't working for me at the moment ...happy Halloween to allxx 

 

                   

 

 Frodo 

Hope its not inappropriate to switch topics in such a serious thread... but from your avatar and the witch smilie you seem to like Halloween... come visit my thread and you'll recieve a warm welcome .

On a wider note...  You're not butting in  Don't be shy + please feel free to join in on the forum on the the whole . Its a lovely place really - where people lend a hand to each other. Despite the spats, differences of opinions and occasional flounces we all care for each other xx 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well said Rosie. Yes indeed frodo, you are a member like everyone else here. Post away x

 

None from me either. What you've said is spot on. This is a recurring pattern with "Chicken" and it would be nice for him to acknowledge to effort and words of support that people give him.

No pitch forks from this direction either, I was thinking similarly, so stayed out of the thread for fear of sounding mean.

I know how hard it must be for you Chicken if you're really feeling this terrible so often, (and I do hope that is genuine, sometimes, because of your lack of response and the fact that you pretty much only come in here to voice your problems, then disappear, I'm afraid I do sometimes wonder if it's just a wind up)

If it's not, then maybe sometimes you could try and join in with the other stuff on here? I understand that you're not very socially confident, but maybe that would be a good place to start, just chatting about any old thing and help with that?

It's hard out there for young people though Rawks ... I take the view that it is sad that it is a recurring pattern, and I'm glad that Chicken feels that he can come on here and voice his concerns and insecurities ... and that he can benefit from the collective help, advice and encouraging words.

 

 

 

Now that is some really good advice

Wow are people that mean you get hate ...of course I don't know the facts

but you all seem too ,so forgive if I didn't understand...beggars belief that folks send hate messages...what are they thinking of 

 

happy Halloween to all ...love to see the little ones dressed up makes my night x

 

 

 

take care all

 

 

Take care too Frodo xx

And a Happy Halloween