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To change the thread theme again, I've just had a convo with my hubby that went like this: (picture the scene, I go for a wee) Husband: Don't flush, I need to go to. Me: What if I want to poo Husband: Hmmmm it's OK Me: Will you play pee the poo round the bowl? Husband: .... *walked away*
Stoppit will ya! I need a wee at this moment in time  *toddles off*
FM
I was talking to someone a while back who got caught short in a club whilst absolutely battered.  Unfortunately there was a queue for the cubicles - what were they up to? - however he was desperate so when a space opened at the urinals he just dropped his kecks, reversed in and went for it, right between a couple of startled onlookers who were using the sanitary wear for it's more conventional use.

He then turned around to have a slash but in his addled state had done up his trousers so wet himself rather spectacularly.  I should add, he also vomited down his front at this point.

Dunno whether he was trying to play Cinds' wee the log around the bog game but an excellent effort I think we can all agree. 
bateman
I know, it's awful when the reality of living together comes in to play.  I remember Mr C before we lived together sayng to me 'I think we've been together a long time now and it's time that things moved along'.  I was crapping myself thinking he was going to ask me to marry him (at the time I wasn't ready).  Anyway, he said he thought it was time we could 'pump' in front of each other
Cinds

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