I am eating and drinking but it is just not staying down.  They have given me all sorts of labeled potions in syringes to take - which I will.

I have always known the expression "heartache" before now and regarded it as a descriptive word.  NOW I know the true meaning of it.  My heart IS aching and sore.

I am going to go and see if I can manage to get a couple of hours rest now.  I still cannot sleep in my bed because Remy's absence from the crook of my knees is so noticeable, I just can't sleep there yet.

Sorry to be such a wuss but had you known Remy and seen her work and dedication, you would understand that not only have a lost a loyal friend, but a little soul who worked her tiny butt off, all her life with me, and saved my life on at least two occasions.

I'm afraid I must 'to bed' now sweetie.

I know someone will be along soon. Keep posting.

Dear Annoca, have just read your latest posts. No words of mine will take away your pain even though I understand it so well. Just as your dearest Remi was an Earth Angel so are many others like the Ambulance crew, there are human Earth Angels as well as animal ones, well that's my belief and observation of certain situations and certain people.


Please take good care of yourself, both Remy and all your loved ones want that for you. I've been in pain through loss of much loved family and dear friends and much loved pets so many times, it's so hard to get through I know but what I constantly learn is we are so much stronger than we can think we are. I wish you strength.

We crossed posts again.

Yes, try and get sleep as best you can. Hang on in there. 

I hope you managed to sleep Annoca.Try and eat a little, if it's only a few nuts every 15mins or so to keep your levels up.Drink milky coffee as well if you can.

Oh Annoca.... I am glad the others are all posting sense ..... cos I can't think of anything sensible to post.  

I feel for you xxxx

Annoca I haven't been here for ages but logged in today for some reason and the first post I saw was yours. I'm so sorry for your loss sweetheart, it is truly heartbreaking to lose a beloved pet. My cat Rosie B who had been my little companion for 15 years died in my arms about 2 and a half years ago. I still miss her so much but time does heal the heartbreak, now I smile when I remember her quirky ways. Pets are not like members of the family, they ARE members of the family.

Look after yourself, keep well for Remy's sake and have the hugest cyber hug from me.

Annoca its understandable that you think that way right now.........and thinking "that way" IS truly painful and heartbreaking because it feels as if you've been abandoned.......but the true reality is you haven't "lost" her at all.....she is still with you and will continue to look after you and work her tiny butt off but she needs you to play your part by taking good care of yourself and loving yourself as much as you loved her.  I know this is easy to say and much more difficult to do but if you can try and take things moment by moment, hour by hour, day by day without looking ahead to the future then it will become more bearable.  Have faith Annoca that all the love you share for each other will not and cannot keep you apart

I am so sorry Jen

Annoca- Hoping you are well and warm today.Sending lots of cyber hugs to you!!

Ah God Annoca this is so sad to read Really feel for you. Can't really say much more then to let you know that there are people out there who know and understand where you are emotionally right now, and stay strong xxx

Annoca  - I've only reached page 3 of this thread and I'm sitting here in tears.    You and Remy were blessed to have found each other and I truly hope your pain eases and that one day you find another companion who will be a worthy successor to her.  Take care, honey.

Annoca it is important as you already know to eat.If not make  an egg nog .
Warm up some milk and add a beaten egg some sugar and some Brandy or sherry and drink that.It will also act as a pick me up at the same time.
Remy would be wanting you to be strong girl.

OMG Annoca just seen this thread

i feel for you, i really do, and the comments in this thread have really made me realise what a lovely, supportive bunch of FMs we have here

be proud of the relationship you had with Remy, it was truly special and whether or not it can be repeated, you both sound like you have been blessed to have found each other

they say time is a healer and I am sure with time you will not forget, but will learn how to cope without having Remy around - thinking of you and RIP dear Remy

Oh Annoca.   Stay strong hun, it will get easier. Remy worked to keep you happy and healthy and you must keep going for her. Don't forget we're here for  you.

Hey Annoca!

How are things today? Please, please tell us!

ANNOCA
Warmest friendly thoughts are being sent to you from many concerned people at this place.
We care.

  Annoca - good things can come after the worst times

Sorry if I worried you - I didn't mean to.

All the regulated syringes I was sent home with, together with all the instructions on how and when to take have certainly worked.  Whatever meds I need for diabetes is in them but they must also have contained something else to make me sleep because I have been asleep for almost the whole day - waking only twice (this being one of those times).  I have to go and eat something now again, then inject again, after which I will go off to sleep again.

This has helped me as I was trying to carry on with everything as normal.  I even noticed when I woke up last time, that in my grief and heartbreak, I had automatically filled Remy's waterbowl and put food out in her dish.

I have received an email from a lady in the USA telling me that she has tracked down a Petit Brabancon with a breeder who lives close to her, and they believe that this little dog is related to Remy through the maternal side.  Judy told her about Remy and they are discussing if it would be feasable to send this dog to me in Ireland.

Judy knows that I don't have tuppence to jingle on a tombstone so what she is hoping to do is to persuade this breeder to put up half the cost of flying her to Ireland and Judy will try and raise the rest.

I am not allowing myself to get excited about this as so many things could go wrong, right up to the last minute.  BUT if it did come to pass I would be over the moon as this little dog would also be a Medical Alert dog.  So we will just have to wait and see.  It could take months to arrange.

I am going off now to eat something and do the injection.  If anyone feels like saying a few prayers in the hope that this wonderful thing might actually happen - then I would by extremely grateful.

I just wish there was something the doctors could do about the heartache and pain and the crying.

As I type this, there is more snow engulfing us outside so everything will be at a standstill again in the morning.  We are supposedly going to have to endure this for another eleven days!!

 take care - all the best wishes in the world for you

Hi Annoca  
Do you need to wait for a dog to come to you from America? It sounds expensive for all involved. You must need help much faster than that can happen!

Ok... I am crossing everything for this to happen for you.

If its meant to be... it'll happen. xxx

In the meantime... I think the knock out effect of the drugs may not be such a bad thing right now...   and, its really good to hear just a glimmer of hope in your post.

You're doing good Annoca...  xxxxxxx

Sending you the biggest hugs ((((annoca)))) and i've got my fingers crossed for you, take care of yourself xxx

This thread has put a lump in my throat for real ((ANNOCA)) xx

Hi Annoca - got everything crossed that this works out for you! Take care hun ,stay warm and safe

Fingers crossed for you hun, still thinking about you xx

Annoca out of the bad comes good,that little dog has been waiting for you.I said Remy would choose the dog meant for you.God bless you,we will say our prayers for you.

Anocca how amazing is that if it is meant to be it will happen, keeping everything crossed for you, take care

Annoca, just popped in to give you a hug

Annoca, I hope everything works out with the little dog from America, keeping everything crossed for you.

Annoca I haven't been on here for a while so this is my first post to you and like everyone else, this thread has moved me to tears



As I say on every thread that is posted like this, unless someone has suffered the loss of a beloved pet,as I have on more than one occasion, they cannot begin to understand the heartache it causes - and it stays with you for the rest of your life although it will get easier and you can begin to remember all the good times with a smile.

 
Of course your loss is perhaps much worse as Remy was your guide and helper too.



Remy will be at peace now together with all our lost little ones.

 You are still in my thoughts

I'm keeping my fingers crossed the dog from America works out xxx

Let us know how you're doing hun.

Sorry I have not been in to speak with you all.  I had another "incident" and had to go to the hospital again and this time they kept me in overnight to get things back on an even keel.  I was brought home the next day to find that the power was gone.  It only came back tonight.

Well the word on the new puppy would appear to be good.  He will have to be flown to England and stay there two weeks before he can enter Ireland. All I have to do now is to see if I can raise £500 to cover his rabies shots, the blood tests and the issue of his Pet Passport.

I know it is not much in the greater scheme of things as all his flights are being paid for and he is being given to me free of charge, but I live on a small disability pension out of which I have to pay everything - rent - food - clothes - utility bills - petrol for car etc. so there is precious little left when all that is done.

I have to decide by next thursday whether I can manage to raise the money - If I can't, then it just won't happen.

This is a photo of the little guy which I thought you might all like to see.  I can't allow myself to feel any hope or excitement until I can see if I can come up with the money.

Thank you all for your lovely posts and for your encouragement.  I truthfully don't think I would be here, typing this, if it wasn't for all your help and kindness.  I will never forget all you have done for me.

 you r having a bad time - £500 is a lot to raise - you can contact  a local newspaper - they do fund raising topics

I wouldn't have time to go down that route, Norfolk.  I have to let them know this coming Thursday.

 there may be a charity you can try - or a dss crisis loan - there must be a way - try every friendly bank manager - local businesses etc

 g'nite Annoca - I've sent u a dialogue - I will answer any questions tomorrow if you reply