Nah..... you just need bigger bottles and longer straws    

Thanks for your advice Tidds, but I'm worried with having Friar Feck spinning around on the blades could make us a tad unstable  

Attention Feckers, who let the cats out of the hold  Can the owner please come and make sure they are taken down below and can they retrieve Mr Partons tea cosy, he's rather upset and went into the cockpit to say he wanted to leave. Thank you 

Right , got any alcohol , need one after JJ and his lies.....

Hahahahahahaha,good kitty roll about some more....As for Mr Parton going to the cockpit,has he chewed through his restraints again  fgs,*Gets new restraints and gimp mask out*

Elikie free bar in the galley help yourself, feel free to let the inmates see how you're enjoying it 

We are going to have to be more careful Lee, that's twice today the tw@ts  Mr Parton's escaped had a wander about, we must make sure he is more secured comfortable in his seat. 

Help yourself to as many as you want Skylark, we're trying to get rid of the out  of date Stella's...it's hard work, we're just moving on to 1994, only another 6 years worth and we can open the new ones 

Attention Feckers, will the paparazz please leave the plain, and Mr Parton can you please calm down, they only want to know why the Australians have refused us landing permission. We are now begging working with the Australian Embassy  to allow you back in Mr Parton. 

  drinking as fast as i can   i feel a song coming on .....

That's the spirit Skylark, well that's the Stella I should say..... we are holding back 24 barrels for Friday night's eviction 

Please not Two Little Boys 

Me boomerang wont come back................

Dont know where that came from, too many Stella,s  I am sure there was a song called that !

there is, and don't have any more Stella's if you're gonna remember the words 

Going to sing it anyway, so there .......there,s always one on the plane eh ??

yes but that one holds the key to the drinks trolley 

Oggbad   

Anyone for a vodka cocktail ?

I'm watching JJ squirm now he knows Nathan's gunning for him, I'm celebrating 

He appears to be of the opinion that asking Nathan's new girly if she was putting it about for cash is not a life and looks enhancing strategy

and saying he doesn't blame Nathan for being mad, he's going to worry about this until friday...oh karma can be a wonderful thing 

*Brings in bottles of champagne,sniffs air* Feckers I smell victory in the air,Bully Boy is about to get his comeuppance,oh how this shall be a sweet moment to savour.

Holds glass out 

Have we got any incontinence pads in the hold, I think Mr Parton is in need of them 

Attention Feckers

We've done 6,000 miles taxiing and not left the airport yet, we are sorry if most of you are experiencing dizziness, When Mr Parton gets his keg lastic out of the door, we will be leaving... sometime 

Is the revolving door stuck?  Or is he doing the kangaroo version of hokey cokey?   

The doors stuck Tidds, we're saving the kangaroo version of the hokey cokey until we eventually take of, the dancing and party will begin. We'll have to have a fuel stop before we get off the ground, fuel tanks going down with all this taxiing 

Oops THOSE are fuel tanks?  I thought it was the duty free storage!   *hides syphoning tube*   

*Gets aircraft in position* Good evening Fecker's,after many aborted take-off's we have it on good authority that tonight is indeed the night,Feck Orf Airlines appreciates your patience and can assure you tonight we WILL depart.

i'd like to apply for the position of air hostess..........here is my application......


good evening mr parton.......welcome aboard......i do hope you find your trip in the luggage hold as uncomfortable as possible........may i offer you a kick in the balls and some cellotape for your big fat gob?

Sponge you're hired....Mad Monk is on the roof rack,close to the propellers,if Del moans about the hold he can go up there with his buddy....Our in-flight entertainment is open to suggestion,feel free to make a contribution.

yayyyyyyyyyyy thanks lee............

Keep of the drinks trolley, tis mine I tell ya 

Welcome aboard Spongey  

Reporting for duty, ready , able and sober

Show the movie "When Mummy met Ben"  followed by  "Mummy and Nathan do London"