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Hi All.

 

Sorry I've not been on and around much (I got an email from a mod indicating people had been asking about me) thanks everyone.

 

The reason I have been away is that my Dad has been in hospital and the family have been doing round the clock stints to be with him as he was receiving palliative care and we wanted to make sure he was comfortable and not in any stress.

 

He had suffered with Alzheimer's disease for many years and as you would expect prone to illness.

 

My Dad passed away on the 16th. I was with my Mum in the room.

 

 

So I have been giving myself time before coming back on.

 

Thanks again to all who was asking about me in the other thread.

 

 

 

Replies sorted oldest to newest

Originally Posted by Enthusiastic Contrafibularities:
Originally Posted by Cinds:

EC, my heart felt condolences to you and your family. Alzheimer's is a truly horrible disease.

 

We're here if you want to talk. Take care. X

 

Thanks Cinds.

 

Yes it is. I now know why they call it 'the long goodbye'.

It is indeed Confusibles.  So sorry to hear about your loss and has been said upthread, talk about this whenever you want here. Many of us have been where you are. Take care of you and yours.  

Xochi

Aw EC..  I'm so sorry 

 

I said all last year that the only thing I could think of that would have been worse than the slow death of the cancer that killed my Mum would have been Alzheimer's .     The brain tumour she had gave me a horrible insight into how truly awful it is to lose bits of the person you love..   right in front of your eyes.   And to watch it rob them of their dignity. 

 

I am so so sorry. 

 

I have also learned (enlightened now ain't I?   wish to hell I wasn't) that however long you have had to "come to terms with their death"..  however much warning you had, however much you prayed for the mercy of death to happen..   it makes no difference when it actually does happen.     Unbelievably it still feels like a shock..    and nothing actually does prepare you for it.

 

You're much loved on here...    the people here will help you...   

 

Its been 5 months for me now..     and its just starting to turn the corner and get better....    (sorry to say that up until christmas it just seemed to hurt more & more each day...   I just clung onto the fact that everyone had said it takes 6 months..   6 months til it starts to get bearable). 

 

And then there is your Mum...     I've had that one too..    a heartbroken grieving parent...     best advice anyone has given my Dad was the six month rule..   DO NOT MAKE ANY DECISIONS... especially about where you are going to live..   for 6 months.   But on a day to day basis..   its so hard.

 

Sorry...  I wittered on.... 

 

I just wanted you to know - somehow we start to get through this..   either that or holding back the tears starts to become a sub conscious thing..    

 

much love xx

 

Dirtyprettygirlthing
Originally Posted by Dirtyprettygirlthing:

Aw EC..  I'm so sorry 

 

I said all last year that the only thing I could think of that would have been worse than the slow death of the cancer that killed my Mum would have been Alzheimer's .     The brain tumour she had gave me a horrible insight into how truly awful it is to lose bits of the person you love..   right in front of your eyes.   And to watch it rob them of their dignity. 

 

I am so so sorry. 

 

I have also learned (enlightened now ain't I?   wish to hell I wasn't) that however long you have had to "come to terms with their death"..  however much warning you had, however much you prayed for the mercy of death to happen..   it makes no difference when it actually does happen.     Unbelievably it still feels like a shock..    and nothing actually does prepare you for it.

 

You're much loved on here...    the people here will help you...   

 

Its been 5 months for me now..     and its just starting to turn the corner and get better....    (sorry to say that up until christmas it just seemed to hurt more & more each day...   I just clung onto the fact that everyone had said it takes 6 months..   6 months til it starts to get bearable). 

 

And then there is your Mum...     I've had that one too..    a heartbroken grieving parent...     best advice anyone has given my Dad was the six month rule..   DO NOT MAKE ANY DECISIONS... especially about where you are going to live..   for 6 months.   But on a day to day basis..   its so hard.

 

Sorry...  I wittered on.... 

 

I just wanted you to know - somehow we start to get through this..   either that or holding back the tears starts to become a sub conscious thing..    

 

much love xx

 

 

That is a very heartfelt post and I can empathise with much of it. 

 

I appreciate the friends on the forum and know what a good group they all are and always willing to give an ear to a problem.

 

I am lucky to work for an organisation that has a councillor - something I have taken advantage of. It's good to chat to a professional, especially someone who has had first hand experience of my situation. I have been given a lot of advice.

 

Thanks for your post and words DPGT 

 

 

Enthusiastic Contrafibularities
Originally Posted by MrsH:

 

thinking of you all at this very sad time 

 

Originally Posted by Cosmopolitan:

Hi EC,

 

Understand fully what you've been through and how it is for you right now.  We've missed you here, and hope that we can now be of some comfort for you  

 

Thanks MrsH & Cosi

 

Everyone is being very nice and I appreciate it.

 

 

 

 

Enthusiastic Contrafibularities
Originally Posted by Bethni:

I'm terribly sorry for your loss E.C. I lost my dad the same way 5yrs ago. Alzheimers is an awful thing to watch and live with. I hope your mum is ok, it will take time but all our thoughts are with you and your family  

Thanks Bethni.

Yes, it's quite dreadful. He had it around 10 years. Mum seems reasonably OK, keeping herself busy.

Enthusiastic Contrafibularities
That's very sad news indeed EC, I'm gutted for you that you've had to go through that
I hope your dad passed peacefully at the end and that he knew he was being looked after, and loved.

Make sure you look after yourself now, even though you probably don't feel like it at times, but it's important
Know that you're not alone, and we are always here for you
~Sparkling Summer~

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