Why not go home every other weekend?

I usually go with the medical profession and their qualified views.

Not knowing the full story, I would expect your doctor knows a bit more than your friends.  If you think he doesn't have your best interests at heart, then seek a second opinion.

i would rawky but after everything that has happened my parents feel better with me coming each weekend. I think i owe them that much.

If you feel better going home each weekend then continue to do so. No one else knows how you're feeling - just do whatever it takes to make you feel better.

I'm no expert - and neither are your friends at uni - you do what you feel is right. There's nothing odd about you as far as I can see - you're just going through a difficult time - it can happen to anyone!

Chicken, I think you should listen to your doctor at the moment.
Your friends aren't qualified to help to deal with your depression, your doctor is.
And I don't think you are odd, BTW.

Chick!  you do what you feel is right for you - if you want to go home at the weekend then do!
there may be weekends where you don't want to - so then don't!
At some point there will come a time when you will want to take responsibility for your life - but don't be in any hurry



And NO! you are not odd!

I agree soozy and yogi. But i always feel like I have to explain why im going and it feels like they are criticising. They think I should stay at uni all the time as they are the best years of my life. But i didnt plan for this to happen. They think I need to be more independent and learn to look after myself.

I don't like the sound of your 'friends'.....maybe advise them to do a course on emotional intelligence?

The minute you stop worrying about what others think (within reason) is the day you'll turn a corner and begin to beat this. It doesn't matter what they think - it's what's important to you!

Its just all the time tho soozy. Its constant. It makes me feel im living my life wrong and questioning all i believe is right. I could do without it tbh

Chicken, you are perfectly 'normal'. Being different is normal. We are all unique in our own little ways.

I work in mental health with young people experiencing mental health problems. Every timeI wear a particular tea shirt that says (words to the effect) 'I like being different...it makes me unique'.......Everyone comments on it and wants to know where I got it from

Be who you are Chicken.........and if other folk think that it's odd and strange.......then thats their problem

But you are looking after yourself, by doing what your doctor recommends.
I don't think your friends mean to be critical, they simply don't understand what having depression means. Sometimes people think it's just like feeling a bit fed up and all you need is to give yourself a good shake and everything will be fine. Of course, it is nothing like that.
If your friends question why you are going home for the weekend, tell them the doctor thinks it will help you get better quicker - and you know they will want what is best for you.

Ive told them that tho yogi and they say its only advice. i think they see it as im running away.

Your right tho , im sure they dont mean to be critical at all. but do i really need to keep explaining myself?

Chicken - when the weekend comes just say see yah to your mates. My guess is you make a big deal/dilemma about it. Just tell them that you enjoy going home and hope that they have a good weekend.

If they see you agonising over every decision and being torn they'll feel they have a right to an opinion.

Wave goodbye to them (with a smile on your face) and greet them the same way on a Monday morning. Unless they can be sympathetic to your needs - don't discuss it with them.

If they keep on asking, I would say (firmly but politely) "I have already explained why I am going home at weekends. I think it is doing me good and I would hope, as my friend, you would want what is best for me".

I'm sorry, but people who say that about depression don't know what they're talking about  You need to do what you think is right for you

Ignorant much? Sounds like your friend's the one that needs to man up. And go and educate themselves while they're at it. Don't listen to 'friends' who clearly have no idea what they're banging on about.

I'd take the doctors advice over arm chair shrinks anyday!

I don't think you are

Like the other posters say, listen to your doctor, if it doesn't work then it's back to the drawing board isn't it?

Big hugs

I've had depression in the past,I still  have an old auntie who believes it doesn't exist and you can "Snap yourself" out of it,utter nonsense of course.Looks like some of your "friends" think the same,ignore them and their "advice".

I am gunna ignore it. I am doing whats best for me. Its just so tiring to keep hearing it

Chicken...  they just don't understand,   many many of them will one day...  and they will probably look back on this and think "ahhh.. I was wrong then... I get it now"

And, you ARE manning up...    you are tackling your problems, and the coming home at weekends is part of that.

If you stayed there weekends and they saw you down and stuff they'd still be telling you to man up.

If my daughter had come to me and said what you've just said (& in the past we've had similar issues to face)...  I would tell her to hold her head high, and to not necessarily tell them why you are going home at the weekend...   if they ask say "because I want to", OR "because my parents need me there at the moment..  I can't really discuss it any further atm"  that kind of thing.

It might feel like they are looking down on you for it...  but eventually people respect those that walk their own path and aren't desperate to be sheep & follow the herd.

You're doing really well chicken...    hold your head high, don't give them the ammunition to criticise you...  and gradually it will all sort itself out xx

This is a minor, and common problem... everybody who goes to uni, goes through it. Grow the hell up OP! And don't come on the forum looking for sympathy. 

Honestly, how did the rest of us make it thorugh life, before the internet - moaning in public option.

I'm guessing they miss you chicken, and thats why they want you at uni more weekends.

Just tell them you will spend weekend at uni in the future just not right now while its makng you feel bad. You are not 'running away' you are actually being very brave, to ask for help and tell people how you are feeling is really difficult and you've managed to do that! I have no worries that you will feel better at some point, just for now going home weekends its whats working for you, its not odd.

Or.... "It's none of your business "?

Rosie, do you really think Chicken's asking for sympathy? I think he's asking for advice.

With all due respect your friends don't know what they're talking about on this and are verging on tactless.

Growing up has nothing to do with it.

As others have said follow your doctors advice - which I hope is working out for you just now.

I wish you well Chicken  

Chicken ignore this post!

Im not looking for sympathy , i am after advice like charli said. The people on here have been so supportive so in trust them

I will Jenstar

I really don't think it is ................if you'd followed you'd know CCM suffers from depression. All kids or most get a bit wobbly early on in UNI life - this is more than that. TBH - you're comments don't help the situation!

Ignore Noseyrosie.

Chicken yes you suffer from depression... go to the uni counsellor, who could help you much better as you tell her what your specific problems are. I suffer from depression, and when I was at Uni... thats the route I took... have you explored that option?  I guarantee there are psychological help services for you, all Unis have them.

If you were serious about needing help, surely you would have pursued that option?

Seek that true help, raher than on a forum. Seriously, help is under your nose.

Chicken's been down the correct channels rosie. Think he's posting about his friends attitudes to his solution.

I do see the student counsellor. And i am on medication . So I am getting help

Thank you velvet

I can`t add any more to what`s already been said Chicken. 

I wish you well.  

Chick you are amongst friends here
I'm sure Brisket will be along soon & will be very pleased to see you !
Am sure his advice would be to heed the docs advice - but ultimately to do what makes you feel more comfortable within yourself !