It's a monster tomato. It's so monster that you have to use the slider bar to see the normal one next to it.
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I've resized it cos it looked mahoosive.
It's not a tomato it's a turnip.
Blimey hell now THAT's what you call a biggun!
it's a red pumpkin 
wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. did ya grow it yerself?
Just to get it in perspective... is that a normal one beside it.. or a cherry tomato?
Not that I'm a suspicious character...
Not that I'm a suspicious character...
Och - that's not what I expected to see! 
<----dead disappointed smiley!
<----dead disappointed smiley!
Tsk..! It's a normal one to the right hand side of it.
It's forrin. It came from Bulgaria. I've got 5 of them.
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It came from Bulgaria.
You sure it weren't Chernobyl?
Blimey, thats a big un,
nearly took my eyes out.
nearly took my eyes out.
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It's not a tomato it's a turnip.
That's gonna b*gger up my plans for toms on toast tomorrow then! 
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Och - that's not what I expected to see!
Me neither. Reference:
You sure it weren't Chernobyl?
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You sure it weren't Chernobyl?
Nah, that'll be teatime tomorrow. Unless it's a duplicitous turnip instead.
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It's forrin. It came from Bulgaria. I've got 5 of them
Bloomin' 'eck! Anyone got a web address for Bulgarian U-date?
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Och - that's not what I expected to see! Me neither.
You were expecting a pic of Patsy's beehive eh?
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It came from Bulgaria
Fecking hell, it be cheaper buying a tin than the postage
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Me neither. 
But, but. but...........you said it was a big 'un. Women can be very fickle at times. 
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Women can be very fickle at times.
Dahling, it's not fickle, it's called having standards Reference:
Fecking hell, it be cheaper buying a tin than the postage
It was smuggled into the country under cover of darkness. I'm well naffed off that the parsnips got away though.Reference:Kaffbaff
You were expecting a pic of Patsy's beehive eh?
Well at least a bee sting and the consequence mebbees Reference:
You were expecting a pic of Patsy's beehive eh?
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Dahling, it's not fickle, it's called having standards
And never having to say "Honey, they lied to you". Reference:
You were expecting a pic of Patsy's beehive eh?
Oi..! It's only tilted over slightly, I'll have you know. It's acute - or so I've been told and looks fine if I walk with a limp. 
That's nothing!
My pumpkins, with a fully grown woman.
My pumpkins, with a fully grown woman.
Blizzie..! 
That looks suspiciously like one of them rogue Lilliput pumpkins...
That looks suspiciously like one of them rogue Lilliput pumpkins...
They are genuine Blizziputs, honest!
I bet you win at conkers every year.
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And never having to say "Honey, they lied to you"
Bang on the money!! 
Reference: Cosmo
I bet you win at conkers every year.
*** polishes cups ***
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*** polishes mugs ***
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It's not a tomato it's a turnip.
Ah, but you're Bulgarian so you would say that. *Passes Blizz the Brasso*
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*Passes Blizz the Brasso*
Don't forget the straw
I thought she downed it straight from the bottle..?
I feel besmirched, or something! Reference:
Ah, but you're Bulgarian so you would say that
Shhhhhh. I'm hiding out.