I had an annoying 'cold call' a week or so ago.
This young man called; my OH answered, and he asked who he was speaking to; she told him, and he asked for me, by name.
So I came to the phone, and the conversation went like this;
Me; Hello, this is <my real name>.
Him; Oh, no, I'm sorry, I need to speak to <my real name>.
Me; Yes, speaking, I'm <my real name>.
Him: Sorry, could you spell your first name for me?
Me: yes it's *-*-*-*-*.
And can you tell my your middle name, please?
Me: my full name is <my full name>. What's this about, please?
Him; My name is John, I'm calling on behalf of <clothing shop>. I have to tell you this call is being recorded for training purposes, and I need to talk to <my real name>. It's about her account card, could I speak to <my first name> please?
Me(slightly irritated): I've already told you twice, that's me. It's my card. What about it?
Him: Well, Mr <my surname> I'd like to talk to you about identity theft...
Me; Excuse me, but I've told you my name; please don't call me 'Mr.'
Him: Oh, I'm sorry. Shall I call you <my first name>
Me: Yes, if that's easier for you. Could you please tell me what this is about, I'm in the middle of something.
He then proceeded to read his script, explaining to me what identity theft is, and how, for a small charge, he could offer me protection against someone stealing my identity, using my store card, or any of my credit cards, and running up bills that I'd be liable for. He finished his little speech with;
Him: So, sir, does that sound like something you'd consider?
Me: No, I don't think so.
Him: No? You don't think identity theft is a problem for you, sir?
Me (irritated again): Look, I've told you my name. I'm not a man, I've asked you not to call me 'Mr', please don't call me 'sir' either.
Him; Oh, I'm sorry, but your voice...you don't sound like...
Me: Yes, I'm painfully aware how my voice sounds on the telephone, but you called me; you have my details, I've confirmed who I am. How can you expect me to take your identity theft protection thing seriously if you don't even believe who I am when you called me?
Him: Sorry; So is this somethin you'd consider?
Me: Didn't you hear what I just said? I don't own a credit card; I have only two store cards, and the staff in both those stores know me by sight, and I'm very careful with my personal details, so No, I'm not interested. But I would like to speak to your supervisor, please.
Him: I'm sorry, we're only allowed x minutes per call, I'm going to have to hang up now.
Of course, these calls are all number-withheld, so I couldn't call back; so I've written to the store concerned, with the above conversation, and asked them to investigate, and get me an apology.
I'm still waiting...