10.28pm: Ryan is holding Lacey's glitzy gold evening bag wistfully. Sorry doll, it doesn't go with your army fatigues.
10.39pm: Outside Razor is the middle-man in a chat between Frankie and Rylan. Frankie's too important to talk directly to plebs.
10.52pm: Frankie and his honchos are having a chat about the HMs. Razor believes they will try to break the regime.
11.02pm: Rylan, Claire, Lacey and Tricia are conspiring. There's a plot involving discarded Indian takeaway going on
11.11pm: It's not even discarded - the lower housemates have uncovered a crate of curry takeout and are greedily munching in the Igloo!
11.22pm: While Razor, Ryan and Frankie play darts and sip red wine, the rest of the gang mop up their curries with a naan. Shhh...
11.36pm: The serfs, including Speidi, are having beers and fun in the Igloo. Meanwhile, bored Dictator Frankie's jumping on his bed.
11.44pm: Frankie and his footsoldiers have a toy tank and are firing bullets at cardboard cutouts of the other housemates. Fun!
11.54pm: Speidi have taken to their beds. The rest of the proles are lounging on the sofas, full-bellied.
12.00am: Looks like benevolent #CBBDictator Frankie's got another treat for the proles. A silent disco has been mentioned...
Nite all 
Originally Posted by Scotty:
Nite all
Night Scotty 
And thanks for all the updates 
Thanks Scotty 
12.14am: Frankie's offering his people a silent disco treat. They're getting to listen to a Village People mp3. Dancing is COMPULSORY.
12.28am: Heidi's putting her hands up for Detroit, or Elstree
12.42am: BB is grilling Frankie over the phone. Little does he know the phone is tapped and the HMs are listening to every word.
12.55am: Speidi are none too thrilled about what they've heard. The fake silent disco is over and they're griping away like billy-o
1.08am: The exhausted proles are starting to retire to bed. Speidi in particular are moaning their coarse woollen work-socks off.
1.19am: Bedtime. Frankie sleeps under silk sheets. HMs are impressed at the details of his conversation with BB they sneakily overheard
1.25am: Lacey has a moment of self doubt. Her bedfellows are reassuring her she's been great for the House. Claire leads the tributes
1.41am: Rylan's leading a bedroom based conversation about#CBBDictator Frankie, dressed only in sky-blue Y fronts. Snazzy.
1.57am: Frankie and co are sleeping in the palace. The serf-chat, meanwhile, is ongoing. We're off for now but back at dawn, comrades!
Day 13: An evening of uprising
9 hours ago
Since the CBB Dictatorship hit the House this morning it's been a frenzy of activity all round â so much so that a round up of the evening's action is probably in order.
Since Rylan's defiant opposition of his leader and his subsequent imprisonment, all kinds of madness has unfolded behind the scenes. This is how dictatorships tend to function â when the big cat's away, the proletariat mice are duty-bound to play.
Leader Frankie and his cohorts, Razor and Ryan, when not dishing out orders, have been sipping a nice red and playing with radio-controlled tanks in the Golden Palace. All the while, the peasants were revolting â with a little nudge from Big Brother at every step. The big dude seems keen on confrontation, so the rebellion's been steered from above and the serfs are only too happy to play along.
Whilst languishing in his cell, Rylan found a dynamite surprise secreted amongst his blankets. A package of explosives that are bound to come in useful tomorrow, he stashed them away when he was eventually released by Master Dettori.
That wasn't the end of the insanity. Acting all benign, Frankie summoned two ladies to accompany him in the Golden Palace for dinner. Dining on fine morsels and sweet-meats, Lacey and Claire managed to tap Frankie's phone and half-inch a key that promised a lovely reward when they figured out what it would release.
It opened the box of banished belongings and hidden away inside was a stash of food â a curry takeaway to be precise. Hiding out in the Igloo, the underling housemates were more than happy to chow down in secret and quaff the beers that had also been provided.
The silliness didn't end there. Full of food and much happier than they'd been nibbling basic rations, the crew received another visit from Frankie and his henchmen. He offered them a silent disco in the form of a pair of headphones each with Macho Man by the Village People piped into their ears â a tune that would surely remind them of their premier.
However, BB played a blinder and, once Frankie had returne
d to the palace and with headphones securely on heads, a private conversation between Frankie and Big Brother was played to them, warts and all, detailing what Frankie thinks of his good, good people. Razor and Ryan watched on, convinced housemates were still boogieing, little realising they were actually indulging full-on espionage. Some of what Frankie said was classified. Proper state secret stuff.
In fact, it's quite possible the content of that convo could divide the people even further. The second day of this task could see the seeds of discontent bloom into a particularly potent agent of change.
We're talking 'bout a revolution comrades â tomorrow brings a new dawn...
Day 13: With great power comes great vote-ability
9 hours ago
Big Brother bestowed the title of dictator on Frankie because he has received no votes so far this series - and because he is light and therefore easy for the guards to carry in the Dictator-mobile. But will putting Frankie in the position of oppressor result in housemates having a reason to call his name when asked for nominees in forthcoming days?
To give him his due, His Excellency has tried to rule fairly, or as fairly as man with rich food and luxurious surroundings can be to peasants with basic rations and none of their normal materialistic crutches. When he sent Rylan to jail for disrespecting him during the pledge of allegiance ceremony, he was quick to advise the secret revolutionary to dress up warmly and bring a blanket.
And when choosing his female dinner companions, Frankie went for Lacey and Claire from Steps out of a compassionate awareness that one may be gone tomorrow.
Yet even over this delicious and civilised three-course meal, reasons for potential future grudges came up. The girls weren't sure they would have been able to rise to the role of supreme leader, or that others among their number would have either. Will Frankie be judged for not shedding his privileges and boycotting the task in the name of democracy?
The most dastardly play came late in the day after Claire and Lacey used their access to the Golden Palace to tap Frankie's phone. Big Brother fired loaded question after loaded question at the Dictator while the housemates listened through headphones, pretending for the benefit of His Excellency's watchful guards that they were dancing to a silent disco.
To the jockey-turned-despot's credit he fielded the question with a mixture of candour and diplomacy. When asked whether he enjoyed his rise in status he said it had been an excellent day because of the eating while acknowledging "I'll be hated by everyone forever and ever."
Given a role-call of housemate names to critique he found only caring things to say about everyone bar persona non gratae, Speidi, and when asked the dynamite question of whether anyone wasn't a celebrity he refused to bite. He even resisted an ego trip. His response to whether anyone was as big a celebrity as him was, "They're all good in their different fields."
Afterwards, Gillian said in awe," He didn't say one bad thing about anyone."
But in a different corner of the House Speidi muttered, "He's just a little hater." If they survive tomorrow's eviction, it seems likely that Frankie's nomination clean sheet will be a thing of the past.
Day 13 round-up: The great little dictator
2 hours ago
Yesterday the dawn of a two day shopping task heralded in a special era for Celebrity Big Brother as the House joined a list of infamous historical regimes. Unlike certain figures we won't mention for fear of upsetting the children (Hello children) Frankie's dictatorship has so far been fair and just, even if regime rules led to the confiscation of bourgeois luxuries and foodstuffs from the House. The housemates were forced to wear rudimentary peasant clothes and subsist on basic rations, while the dictator feasted in his luxury palace, protected by his loyal guards.
Oh yes, his guards. Razor and Ryan escaped the worst of peasant drudgery via special appointment as bodyguards to His Excellency. Charged with keeping the plebs in line and carting the diminutive Dettori around in his dictator-mobile, the duo did their job with relish. Kevin Costner in the Bodyguard had nothing on them.
But Big Brother had a secret task within the shopping task up its socially-minded sleeve.Rylan was chosen to spearhead a secret revolution. During a ceremony designed for the humble housemates to pledge allegiance to their great leader, Rylan deliberately insulted Frankie and was correspondingly thrown in the slammer. But that was part of the plan, man. Waiting in the prison for him was a stick of dynamite. We're willing to stake our shapkas that those bad boys will come out to play today.
It was business as usual for the oblivious Frankie whose evening involved a foot massage from Gillian and a state dinner, which he kindly invited potential evictees Lacey and Claire to join. They enjoyed his hospitality then stitched him up, attaching a bug to his phone and stealing a key to the trunk where their luxury items are banged up.
As a final bid to rock the dictatorship Big Brother orchestrated a silent disco for the housemates. What Frankie and his guards believed to be wall-to-wall disco classic quickly morphed into a live feed into a covert phone conversation he was having with button-pushing overlord BB. We wondered whether candid opinions would shake his in-House popularity but a slew of diplomatic statements meant all but Speidi still love their leader.
Of course, there's still unaccounted for dynamite in circulation and what with resistance-driven flick Les Miserables cleaning up at the box office, revolution is very much in the air. All the counter-regime activity got us a little confused so we wrote a summary. A spectre is haunting Elstree, the spectre of revolution. And eviction....
Morning All
8.00am: Morning! So far, it's all quiet on the western front.
8.21am: The HMs are currently a bunch of snory-mcsnorisons.
8.38am: Ryan is up and walking around the Golden Palace. Maybe he's patrolling the area to make sure there's no threat to the Dictator.
9.07am: Ryan put his socks on and went back to bed. That is all the action so far.
9.23am: Day 2 of The Regime - how will the HMs fare under the Dictatorship of Frankie Dettori? We have a feeling change is on it's way.
9.39am: No sign of life yet, not even from early-risers Speidi.
9.55am: We know we've mentioned this before, but Razor's snoring is SO loud!
10.11am: The lights are on in the main bedroom, while the Dictator and his guards snooze on.
10.24am: The sleepy housemates are stumbling around the bedroom in an attempt to get ready for the day
10.35am: As there is a ban on beauty products, there's less faffing from the HMs this morning.
10.49am: Tricia is moaning about Razor's snoring... Again
10.59am: Rylan is trying to start a revolution. Speidi aren't playing ball
11.07am: Speidi are begrudgingly joining in, however they do think the other HMs are 'crazy' for making a fuss over the task
11.22am: Unbeknownst to the Dictator, the civilians are planning their revolution. It will take place during impending his speech
11.36am: The Dictator and the guards are having a lesuirely coffee in the Golden Palace
11.47am: Claire is describing her eviction outfit "It's a bit like a Nun's outfit". We can't wait to see it.
11.56am: Frankie is getting ready for his speech. The HMs have got other plans
11.58am: While the Dictator gives an impassioned speech, the civilians are sabotaging the House
12.01pm: The HMs are currently toppling the statue of Frankie, after they'd exploded it using sticks of dynamite.
12.03pm: The Dictator has been captured and The Regime has been overthrown! The HMs are jubilant
12.06pm: Frankie and the guards have been thrown in the slammer, leaving the other HMs to raid the Golden Palace
12.08pm: The housemates have won a luxury shopping budget
12.20pm: The HMs are enjoying a nice cuppa after their victory.
12.33pm: The HMs are in serious clean-up mode - the House is starting to resemble it's former self
Day 14: It's the beginning of the revolution
1 hour ago
We brought you the news yesterday that a Dictator, namely Frankie Dettori, had seized power of the Big Brother House. The oppressed civilians (or housemates as they are otherwise known) have been stripped of their clothing and personal possessions under his regime, and have been forced to live on tinned rations. And if this wasn't enough, they have been instructed to obey his every whim, with refusal of this rule resulting in time in the slammer.
It was looking bleak for the civilians... that is until arevolutionary leader in the form of all-singing, all-dancing Rylan Clarke stepped forward. He and his army of revolutionaries have already begun to bring down the establishment from the inside - and today they've taken their efforts up a notch.
Earlier this morning, Rylan was called to the Diary Room and given a blue print of the Big Brother House. The purpose? To help him and his followers plot a revolution during the Dictator's speech later today. During the televised event, the civilians must complete a series of objectives in order to win their freedom and a luxury budget in tow.
Will they manage to overthrow the Big Brother tyrant? Or will they continue to live off rations in the form of a basic food budget? Stick with us to find out...
12.47pm: Fresh out of his civilian outfit, Rylan is brightening up the bedroom with his pink onesie
CBB 09.00pm - 10.30pm CH5
CBB BOTS 11.30pm - 12.30am CH5
12.55pm: Speidi are convinced that Lacey is going this evening.
1.00pm: Lacey is also convinced she'll be leaving - but so are Claire and Rylan. Speidi, however, are cool as cucumbers.
Day 14: Revolutionary results - the shopping task has concluded
26 mins ago
BREAKING NEWS!
During the Dictator's live speech to his subjects, a group of revolutionaries, led by singer Rylan Clarke, staged an uprising to end to the oppression. Unbeknown to the Dictator, the revolutionaries run amuck in the main House while he was addressing his subjects from the conference stand, as they tried to seize power from the tyrant.
Luckily, our man on the scene managed to get hold of the revolutionaries objectives and we can exclusively reveal their sabotage plans to you.
OBJECTIVE 1: Tear down all propaganda posters
OBJECTIVE 2: Deface the large flag in the garden
OBJECTIVE 3: Deface all the banners in the garden with red paint
OBJECTIVE 4: Unlock the box and recover banned items
OBJECTIVE 5: Plant explosives in the statue of Frankie
OBJECTIVE 6: Detonate the explosives
OBJECTIVE 7: Lasso the statue to topple it over and destroy it
OBJECTIVE 8: Capture the Dictator and his guards
The freedom of the civilians and the chance of winning a luxury budget have been resting on this act of vandalism, and from the footage coming from the House, we can announce that the housemates were successful in their mission. The Regime has fallen and the Dictator, along with his guards, have been sent straight to jail.
Down with Dictator Frankie, all hail the luxury food budget!
The housemates plot their revolution
The Dictator, flanked by his guards, delivers his speech to the subjects. Little does he know they're occupied with their sabotage plans..
Speidi get straight to work, in charge of defacing the flag
Rylan detonates the explosives hidden in the statue
Gillian and Tricia lasso the effigy and force it to the floor
Rylan, Claire and Lacey prepare to capture the Dictator
The revolutionaries are jubilant in their success
The Dictator and his guards are thrown straight in the slammer
Viva la revolution! The housemates celebrate after hearing they've won a luxury shopping budget
1.06pm: Spencer's advice to the other HMs - "If you come to this show trying to be more famous, you're head will explode"
1.31pm: Spencer says he feels 'so free without all those layers on' - don't worry, he means his task outfit not clothes in general
1.36pm: The housemates' shopping has arrived just as we're tucking into our lunches - nom nom noms all round
Day 14: It's eviction day â who do you choose?
56 mins ago
So much has gone on these past 14 days, that accurately calling who'll be tonight's departing housemate is a bit of a stretch. The parameters are certainly not defined - no matter what you might think.
We've cast our beady eye over housemates' behaviour over the course of the past week to ascertain how the odds are looking. We're not gamblers and we're not making any recommendations here. As far as we're concerned, the game's absolutely anyone's as things stand...
Claire
Frequently criticised for taking to the hob and refusing to budge, Claire was picked by Speidi as they milked the fruits of their basement time and picked her to face the public vote. Hampering her chances is the general perception that she's one of the least active housemates, joining in with tasks but being something of a wallflower when it comes to stepping up in conflict and fun. However, this perception is subject to change. She was picked for speaking her mind about Speidi and she's recently been a source of reassurance for the slightly lost-looking Lacey. There's also that charming friendship with Rylan to take into consideration. On top, of course, of the fact that she's Claire. From. Steps. Now that's a formidable fan base if ever we saw one.
Lacey
Lacey found herself in a confusing position after the most recent nomination round-robin. She found herself picked to face the door by six of her fellow housemates despite the fact she doesn't have an enemy in the House. Even Speidi, the current pantomime villains, have time for Lacey â at least when she's around. Behind her back they're a little less kind. Lacey gets involved and is a source of constant enthusiasm. The main reason she seemed to be nominated was due to her age and puppyish enthusiasm â things that in the wider world are seen as anything other than flaws. She also has a legion of fans of her modelling work. If they demand more of their pin-up onscreen and vote with their fingers, Lacey may well escape the boot.
Rylan
Rylan, like Claire, finds himself in the frame due to the judgement of Speidi. Since launch night, the American pair has had it in for the X Factor warbler, mainly because he comically popped them in the basement to save himself from the same fate. Viewers are unlikely to share their distaste for the Essex boy over that slight. In fact, they're likely to find his BB rulebook-shredding act of defiance hilarious. Since that opening evening, Rylan's been a major focus of activity in the House, larking about and making bonds all over the place. He's also the man of the moment, very much the reality TV star du jour and is so popular that fans carried banners with his name on the launch night on the strength of rumours of his appearance alone. That's not to say there aren't Rylan crytics out there â but the question is whether or not they outnumber his fans.
Speidi
Then we come to the perceived villains of the piece, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. At first many began to warm to the married couple from The Hills as we realised that they weren't quite the one-dimensional spouses we'd been led to believe by US tabloids and their own reality shows. As time went on, they started to lose favour by showing defiance whenever BB asked them to comply. Their basement task saw them listening in to other housemates and forming grudges and, when they returned, it was tense stuff. Now they're living with people who, in their own words, they "hate". Saying all that, if there's one thing Celebrity Big Brother fans enjoy it's the 'big' characters - especially glamorous American ones. We love to watch ones who can be relied on to forge a massive scene. Not forgetting that there's double the impact with these two - whether that works in their favour or against it.
It's your shout, people. Who are you going to vote to save? The power's in your hands. Vote here.