Day 52: A narrow egg-scape
22 mins ago
With the housemates a man down, there is a space at the head of the House and one of the gang has been making a bid for it. Dexter has spent the morning flexing his domestic God muscle in the kitchen.
Unfortunately his fellow housemates can't think of a worse way for him to earn alpha male stripes.
In the garden Hazel, Joe, Sam and Sophie were plotting a coup.
Hazel said: "Last time he washed up the knives and forks looked like they had been licked."
Joe had seen worse and added, "One time the colander he'd washed had a proper stain on it." How do you stain a colander? That's impressive.
But that wasn't the worst of Dexter's campaign to be top dog. He was threatening to cook breakfast.
"I really don't want to have one of his omelettes," Sophie whined. "He makes them like pancakes."
"Why are we letting Dexter cook," Sam exclaimed.
All four agreed that Dex is a truly terrible cook â only equalled by Gina and Wolfy. How were they going to get out of eating his culinary creation?
Fortunately Sam had cracking a plan. He's not just a pretty face. "Tell him because he did the cleaning, I'll cook," he suggested.
Brilliant. Hazel swooped in just in time and demanded Dexter hand over the omelette pan to Sam. He reluctantly relinquised it but is loitering around the kitchen in socks and action sandals waiting for an opportunity to take back control.
Watch this space. We reckon you ain't seen nothing yet.