After 66 days (or 70 if they make the final), our housemates have pretty much shown us everything they can do.

Through tasks, secret missions and general mucking about, they've given us every trick in their satchel. If we take some time to examine their stay as though they were showcasing their talents to the wider world, from the microcosm of the BB compound to the macrocosm of the universe beyond, it becomes pretty clear what jobs they might do when reality comes crashing back down around their ears.

Join us as we put on our Career Advisor hats and scrutinise our remaining housemates' BB CVs.

Adam

Barely anybody's had a problem with Adam in his entire stint in the House, so that's a whole bundle of strong references already for the "White Tiger" from Dudley/South Central LA. He looks quite snazzy in a uniform, as he proved in the warden task and when dressed as a terrifying sergeant major. These strong interpersonal skills combined with a physique that looks marvellous in a regulation outfit mean that we'd advise Adam to take a deskjob working for the:

US AMBASSADOR

Ashleigh

Despite her tender years, our girl from Essex already has a long and slightly bewildering career history. She's told us, in various chinwags with her pals, that she's worked as a stockbroker, a hairdresser, a bartender and spent some time working on a retail counter. In fact, she's pretty much exhausted every role in every industry known to man. All apart from one duty and one line of work. Since Luke A gave her a sound lesson in pounding spuds, Ashleigh's become a dab hand at mashing potatoes. Therefore the only realistic line of work left is:

DINNERLADY

Deana

Already crowned as Miss India UK and the proud employer of servants of her own, Deana's already top of a couple of piles as things stand. But she's shown an awful lot of common sense over the course of nine weeks (you don't escape eviction four times without any of that), and she's also managed bad relationships like a professional diplomat, running enemies out of town and forging life-long relationships that look set to last. With this pragmatism and plain-speaking, we reckon Deana's dead set for a role as a:

POLITICIAN

Luke A

It's a bit of a no-brainer, this one. He cooks for a living as it is. He's made an impact on the populace with his lovely manner and he's a borderline celebrity as he heads headlong for the final. Let's work with what we've got and conclude that the best career path for Luke A is:

CELEBRITY CHEF

Luke S

He's no good when it comes to pushing buttons, so air traffic control is out of the question. Perhaps the most surprising thing about our ladies man from Stoke is just how homely he turned out to be. Always happy to take his turn at the stove, he's happy cooking food for his beloved Ashleigh (though he gets a little irksome when she overdoes the demands). He's a class act when it comes to tidying up, taking on the cleaning duties without complaint and sniffing in the direction of hygiene runaways like Scott and Caroline. On top of all this domestic bliss, Luke S has been the go-to man when anything needs darning, happily obliging with a needle and thread when the occasion demands. There's nothing else for it. We recommend Luke S becomes a:

SEAMSTRESS

Sara

She's a model. She's got the look. She's sexy and she knows it. But after watching her for the past few weeks, we rather get the impression that that's not really what Sara's all about. When she first sang that rousing rendition of God Save The Queen, we knew it was love. Only the staunchest republican could've stayed rooted to their seat. She loves the Queen. She loves all her heirs. There's nothing else for it – Sara must be a:

FLUNKY

Scott

Funnily enough, it was as recent as Day 64 that Scott talked us through some of his future career options. He upset Sara with the declaration that he'd like to work in the naughty telephone line industry and the two eventually agreed that he'd take his other preferred path. That particular stream of thought had the boy from Macclesfield breeding pups – and who would we be to stand between a man and his dream? Fair enough then, Scott – if you're absolutely dead set on it, you shall be a:

CHIHUAHUA BREEDER

Perfect! 

We think we've cut out our housemates' futures with some aplomb there – but no doubt you lot disagree. If you can think of some respectable employment options for our 2012 crop of housemates, why not let us know?

We might even pass on the best (and least insulting) suggestions.