Had to go docs for those in my day

Yeah.......

Thanks for the company everyone

that is on soooooooooooo many levels wrong

When I had Growly Jnr I was desperate for her to be a girl.  But if she had have been a boy, I can't imagine anything that would have made me consider going through the horrors of pregnancy, childbirth, or looking after a tiny baby for a second time . 

I can't being to understand how anyone could possibly want eight children   It just seems obscene to me to bring so many children into an already overcrowded world.

I was desperate to know what flavour I was getting but Hetty was shy and wouldn't pose for the scans. I only wanted to know though so I could start shopping and avoid beige. I would have been happy with whatever gender I'd had. Hubby wanted a girl but I know he would also have ultimately been happy with either too.

Indeedy

I agree Growly... like someone said earlier, some people would be grateful for just one

When I was in hospital having the 2nd of my 3 sons (and the one girl who was the first girl born ino my husbands side of the family for 70 odd years) there was a girl who'd had 5 boys and had had one last try for a girl....she got one...and another boy as well!

Awwww Croc, we had a mum at school who had 5 boys, then went on to have a girl (she was 22 when she had the girl )

She was sooooo delighted

22 ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 5

 I second that

Frightening eh?

She left the father and the boys once she had the girl ... took the girl with her.

There is a lady round the corner from me who has 5 boys but is desperate for a girl..I told her girls are much more hassle than boys but she still wants one!

Queenie, I remember how frustrated you were at the scans when she wouldn't pose for the cameras

OMFG I watched this programme in absolute horror! How bloody dare these women come onto my TV in my living room and cry about the fact that their baby is a boy when he's healthy and perfect!

Why can't they just be grateful for being blessed with these children? They are lucky they have any at all!!!

Cherylstolemylollipop I'm hoping/assuming you WERE joking about the termination comment...? From someone who has lost 3 perfectly formed and beautiful children in the 2nd trimester these comments are very much taken to heart and very hurtful.

I wish I hadn't watched that programme now as I'm just seething with all of them! The woman who had her twin girls was so bloody miserable considering she got her 'own way'! Silly bitch!

She was indeedy Lazybug - but, as Saz said, I think it will be payback time when those girls hit their teens (especially if they have seen this programme)

And, FWIW - I think cheryletc was being flippant. Ignore.

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww LB

My Mum and Dad had 2 boys followed by 2 girls then boy, girl, boy, girl..4 of each..not bad......I am the youngest, Dad always said it was a bloody good job I was a girl.....

Joking about what? I only asked whether you find out the sex before the termination deadline. It was a serious question cos i genuinely didn't know the answer. I'm not clued up on these things..











But I wasn't joking when I said I don't want a baby girl ever. If I do ever have kids which to be honest is doubtful unless I change my perspective on what I want out of my life, but if I do ever have kids I definitely want a boy, not a girl.

Blimey lal, 4 of each!

LB

Crunchy, hopefully you are just as 'honest' with people in real life and any sane women will run a mile from you.

First time I was pregnant I desperately wanted a boy (I have no idea why)... they wouldn't tell me at my scan, but I had convinced myself and everyone around me it was a boy.

We bought all boys clothes... had a boys name chosen.. the lot!

So... after half a week in labour I was completely unprepared for the announcement that she was a girl!   It threw me for an hour or so... but then, later, back in the hospital room I fell in love with her and was chuffed to bits.

5 years later I kinda plucked up the courage to have another baby... and I did want this one to be a boy... but if not, if it were to be a girl, I wanted to know, to give myself chance to get my head round it and be ok with it.  Also... my daughter (aged 5) had forbidden any more girls... she insisted I only make her a brother.

Again, they wouldn't tell me at the scan, but this time I didn't even try and guess.   Twas a boy!  

Some people may think they know which gender they prefer before even becoming a parent ... but honest, it doesn't work they way you think.   

For most of us, once bonded with our babies, be they boy or girl.. they are the bestest baby in the world!

I had girl, boy, girl, boy.

My second daughter was desperate for a baby sister, and I often find my youngest boy 'dressed up' by her!

First pregnancy I wanted a boy and was convinced myself I was having a boy. 20 weeks on and I started hemorrhaging every time I stood up and this pretty much continued throughout my pregnancy. I was so worried that something would be wrong with my baby and was absolutely delighted when I gave birth to a healthy baby girl! Second time around I didn't care at all what the sex was and had another daughter. Stopped at 2 and consider myself sooo blessed to have them.

By the time you can find out the sex of the child they are fully formed otherwise you wouldn't be able to see what sex they are... Unfortunately the termination deadline is 24 weeks... I know 2 children born before the deadline and have survived and are perfect (although one has learning difficulties). I know 3 other children born before the deadline... Mine - One at 20 weeks, one at 22 weeks and one at 24 weeks - All three were perfect, beautiful and amazing! I understand what you are trying to infer but to terminate a child because it's not the gender you want is unforgivable and very wrong JMO

I'd say it's most people's opinion, Lazybug!

Thank you Blizzie and thank you everyone else

I'm feeling a bit fragile and emotional on this subject as it'll be my first daughters 6th anniversary on the 26th. The day she was born and died is still so vivid and raw which makes it so hard . I really shouldn't have watched that programme tonight

Oh Lazybug, I am so sad for you and the loss of your babies. I can't imagine how terrible it must be for you. I agree that the question asked is utterly insensitive and if the poster wanted to know the answer, perhaps looking on the internet would be more appropriate than asking on a forum, where many people would find this a very upsetting subject.

Thank you Miss Lippy - I don't think some people really think about what they are saying sometimes and probably don't mean to offend or upset anyone but like I said before I'm a bit high on emotion at the moment. You deal with life and what it throws at you and the programme tonight got my back up so much as these women were popping out child after child and not taking in the absolute wonder at how very luck they are to have healthy living children boys or girls they are a blessing!

Lollipop person just hit a raw nerve at a bad time... their bad!

I can totally understand your distress at the programme. A lot of women are unable to have children and that is so sad, but to lose perfect babies prematurely is much much worse. I have a friend who went through the same as you and it is heartbreaking as she would be such a fantastic Mum, just like you. I send you a big hug (xx) - I don't know how to work the smilie thing icon.

Depending on the test that you have, the sex of a foetus can be determined at around 10 weeks, which is well within the deadline for a termination.  I believe CVS tests are about 99% accurate.  But some hospitals have a policy of not disclosing the sex; I've always understood that this was partly because some cultures have a preference for boys and this could lead to healthy female foetuses being terminated.

I never found out with any of mine....not that I really needed to...I knew what I was having and it was only with the first one had an alternate sex name in mind...the subesquent ones I only had the names they've go picked.

I don't know if its changed now but at the time my local hospital said it was policy not t disclose the sex (if they could tell)

I had four sons before I had my daughter & wouldn't change any of them for the world...am so glad I had my daughter though...my love for her is no more or less than for my boys but it is different!
I might add I did not try for a fifth but am thankful for the circumstance leading to her being concieved!


It wasn't an option to know the sex of the child when I had mine....am not sure I would want to..I think it adds to the thrill of giving birth!

I've got three sons, and never asked the sex of any of them before they were born.
I wasn't disappointed that they were all boys, and never really saw myself as having a 'girly' girl.

They're all teens now, and never seem to have the strops,and hissy fits that my nieces have   Maybe I've just been lucky

 To carry on having children in the vague hope that you might get your preferred sex, seems a bit irresponsible to me, and although I would have loved another child
part of the reason I didn't was everyone would think I was desperately trying for a girl.............The other part was Mr S said noooooooooo

When I was pregnant I wasn't really bothered either way but I would have like a daughter eventually. She was a girl and it's leading me to think whether I ever want to have another baby. Certainly not now and if I ever got pregnant again I wouldn't really mind what the sex would be. Although it would be nice to have another little girl so I don't have to move house! But a boy would be different!

I thought the woman that eventually had the twin girls STILL looked miserable after having them. It was really weird. I reckon she had issues

Lazybug

I'd agree with that.  I suppose its not the love that's different.. its the relationship.

Looking back on it all in general, I can now see that every preconceived (ha!  literally) idea I had about kids, their genders, what they would be like, was unrealistic tosh really.  

My daughter began boarding at her new 6th form in September, and I was dreading being in a houseful of males (son, hubby & dog)...  but I rarely notice it...  I was thinking myself into thinking I would feel alienated... I really don't.

Still miss the girl (though she's back tonight for the weekend.. *big grin* yay! ) but its not because of any gender divide as I imagined it would be.

by the sounds of it I think I made a right decision not to watch that programme..

For me all I would have liked was to actually have a baby. .the sex of it didn't even figure in the equation.. never happened tho.

some people have no idea when they are well off

and FWIW I think crunchy you're  best not having any... one of you is enough. .   if you want someone to play footy with pop down the park, there's normally some sort of game going on..