You've been getting too close to the family dog again, haven't you?

Is that an excerpt from the official police statement by the girl whose washing line you pillaged?

 

You lot absolutely loved that - be honest LOL

 

Not read them.  Instead I am following 50 Sheds of Grey on Twitter 

Mrs B, I think it's hilarious that a war broke out over your books! Girls here are borrowing them off anyone they can, there's desperate pleas on my FB and 4 of my friends have just started reading the first one yesterday! My yoga class girls were of mixed opinion too, if nothing else these books certainly are attention grabbing hey

The mention of 50 Shades appeared on my FB and Twitter and I wondered what on earth it was.

 

Now I have read the trilogy and I have to say whilst they weren't literary masterpieces I would class them as an easy holiday book read. Didn't offend me in the slightest. I wonder why it has become some popular tho? is it because its a norty read? 

It was really sad!! I even had one girl pm me telling me I was a c-word cos I sold them to someone else and she had been asking for them!!! It's a first come first served basis on the local selling page and she lost! I tell you, some women are mental here...must be the Suffolk air! Mind you, the lady who bought them is a Body Shop rep and gave me a bag of freebies for all the abuse I got.....hurrah!!!

That's mental! If she wants them that frigging badly, why not just order them from Amazon?!

 I know!!!! Maybe she couldn't be bothered to wait??!! She's back on the page tonight begging for them...I told her they had loads in the local Sainsburys...and she said she couldn't be bothered to go to the other end of town....just as well she didn't get mine then as I live a few hundred yards from Sainsburys!!!!!!! She is proper mental!

Wot books did you write Mrs B ??

It was originally an e-book success, and as a few people I've heard have pointed out, the reason it did so well on kindle, etc, was because when you're on a bus or train, other people can't see what book it is you're reading...

I just finished reading all of those (she only just finished the book, without stabbing herself in the eye!) and it's hilarious! Well worth a read

 

Whoever said that they tend to be read by people who don't usually read books - I'm inclined to agree after seeing the two girls in Waterstones at the weekend buying the second one

50 shades of  cock fanny wank spunk shagdirty dirty guilty i shouldn't have read that oh my God don't admit it to anyone.

 

QED

 

So now you don't have to waste yer money

 

That website quotes this line from the book:

And from a very tiny, underused part of my brain - probably located at the base of my medulla oblongata near where my subconscious dwells - comes the thought: He's here to see you.

I bust a gut laughing so much  How old is the writer?

FGS!

Apparently you can end up in A&E after reading the book, so said Samantha Brick on This Morning today 

i posted this in another thread at the weekend.. it should probably have gone here...

 

 

Joe and Cinds just reminded me...    i was visiting my (innocent and naive) sister (who is addicted to programmes like CSI etc)  today.   She heard everyone talking about '50 Shades of Grey', didn't know what it was about, so she downloaded a sample to her Kindle.   She said today 'I've read the sample of that book, I'm going to buy it I think it will be good.... but what was he buying the rope and tape and cable ties for?   It's going to turn out that he's a murderer isn't he?   I love a good murder mystery...'    

 Kaffy

After all the reviews from friends and on here I think I'd rather read Playboy  

kaffy that's hilarious!

Cagney I quite agree lol I've decided I won't be reading them, and I can't believe how popular they are after so many bad reviews

Having said that, I was a Sunset Beach fan lol

Also, while in Waterstones at the weekend, my bf noticed the stacks of Fifty Shades of Grey books and suggested it might be something I would like... I had a mini meltdown at him

There are some hilarious quotes on there And I really enjoyed the girl (blogger)'s writing style, and her imaginative and varied use of insults, expletives and general raaaaaaaage

Is that through busting a gut laughing like Rawky.

^

Cosi. I have seen some of the stuff from there. It is hillarious.

I just looked at that ... v. good

Which one there are loads!

I stared longingly through the shed window & adjusted my trousers. The sight of her dewy, slightly unkempt lawn had awoken my inner gardener

^^^ A quote from 50 sheds of Grey

 

^^ this one Jen ... and many more, like this:

 

Lady Christina bit her lip as she eyed my dripping brush. Somehow I knew it wouldn't be long before I'd be touching up her gazebo

I've got so many friends who have raced through these books and there I am struggling to get through the first one - it's so badly written I have this look on my face for most of the time ------>   Oh well Chapter 13 how many more before I get to the end? 

Ahh right 'sheds' lol missed that

That's from the book? Jeebus! That is horrendous.

It's brilliant, eh? 

 

A recent fave:

 

So this was it - it was really going to happen. Every man's ultimate fantasy . . . Three In A Shed.

A shed?! Yeah I'm sure lol

I think that twitter account is more entertaining than the books

 

After seeing this thread and reading that brilliant review of the first chapter THEN seeing my facebook implode with people talking about it, I've decided to give it a go.  

 

What a load of old shit.