Skip to main content

I have absolutely no problem with prostitution, (or indeed sex outside of a loving relationship,) as long as it's a personal choice and doesn't involve abuse or coercion. That choice could be because of a myriad of reasons, including that one has switched off any 'sex equals love' button; out of sheer desperation due to financial difficulties; or because it is a 'career' choice, (perhaps a little unusual but not unheard of, I'm thinking of a number of people I'm aware of, including a woman in my village who has been offering a service to local farmers etc. from her own home for many years, apparently discreetly and without fuss.) It wouldn't include where 'pimps', 'madames' or gangs  are trafficking or otherwise exploiting or abusing the sex workers.

And therein lies the dilemma in the legalisation/ decriminalisation debate, on the one hand I think yes, on the other I would be concerned if that resulted in giving free reign to those who exploit and abuse. My other concern is that a high proportion of prostitutes have been sexually abused as children and what may appear to them to be a choice really isn’t at all, just a continuation of that abuse. On balance I think it should be decriminalized, but with strict safeguards and exit/support routes where necessary.

I do, on the other hand, have a problem when women, (and it does tend to be women, rarely men,) are called 'sluts' 'slags' etc. and often by those who actually engage in sex with them; those who take the moral high ground; those who are sexually repressed themselves; or simply those who are highly judgemental. I also have a problem with those who assume that, as in Helen’s case, ‘once a prostitute always a prostitute’ and that she is incapable of having any relationship without money changing hands. 

FM
Last edited by Former Member
Originally Posted by Kaffs:
   (I know it would take generations to change the attitudes.. just musing..)

Interesting 'though how attitudes towards 'child prostitution'  and 'child pornography' changed v  v quickly once legislation was changed and they were  was renamed, respectively, 'child sexual exploitation' and 'child abuse images' 

FM

I listened to a few Woman's Hour programmes on this. What I remember was how many articulate women who are prostitutes saying that there are a significant number who are not doing it for drugs, have not been "trafficked",or coerced into it, but enjoy the money and treat it as a job. (how they can do that is beyond me)I think it was a Scandinavian country where its legal but illegal to be a punter..and there is no violence against women which is a very good thing.

Amythist

Another thought: I was interested to read that Helen was in care, so it is worth considering that children who have been in care are over represented as prostitutes and, (not saying that this is the case with her as I have absolutely no idea,) that children's homes are the favourite hunting ground for those recruiting young people into prostitution 

FM
Originally Posted by Supes:

Another thought: I was interested to read that Helen was in care, so it is worth considering that children who have been in care are over represented as prostitutes and, (not saying that this is the case with her as I have absolutely no idea,) that children's homes are the favourite hunting ground for those recruiting young people into prostitution 

recruiting is trafficking isn't it? the care system probably doesn't make its kids aim high

Amythist
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:

Another thought: I was interested to read that Helen was in care, so it is worth considering that children who have been in care are over represented as prostitutes and, (not saying that this is the case with her as I have absolutely no idea,) that children's homes are the favourite hunting ground for those recruiting young people into prostitution 

recruiting is trafficking isn't it? the care system probably doesn't make its kids aim high

Sometimes, a popular modus operrandi of those who sexually exploit young people is where they target vulnerable kids in care, offer them  things they have little or no access to e.g. affection, presents such as iphones etc. With girls they often fake falling in love with them and then, once they have them in their clutches tell them that if they love them they will do this for them

FM
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:

Another thought: I was interested to read that Helen was in care, so it is worth considering that children who have been in care are over represented as prostitutes and, (not saying that this is the case with her as I have absolutely no idea,) that children's homes are the favourite hunting ground for those recruiting young people into prostitution 

recruiting is trafficking isn't it? the care system probably doesn't make its kids aim high

Sometimes, a popular modus operrandi of those who sexually exploit young people is where they target vulnerable kids in care, offer them  things they have little or no access to e.g. affection, presents such as iphones etc. With girls they often fake falling in love with them and then, once they have them in their clutches tell them that if they love them they will do this for them

I want to like this because I'm interested and agree with the content, but 'like' seems wrong.

Kaffs
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

Interesting post, supes.   I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.    I do believe what they say about her in there - I bet she's a good friend to those who really know her.     

Yes, me too...and I'd rather be her friend than her enemy

For sure!  

Kaffs
Originally Posted by Yogi19:
From what I've read, as a teenager Helen was taken into care when her behaviour was out of control. I don't think she had bad parents, they simply didn't know how to cope with her. She became pregnant when she was in care and was given a flat for her and the baby. She got into debt - by going on a holiday, not buying nappies and food for her baby - and was advised by someone that prostitution was an easy way to make cash and decided to go for it. All of this could be twaddle, but that's what I've read.

This is what really interests me, I'll have to have a google, not least of all because it would be v v rare for someone to be taken into care these days because of poor behaviour.

Either way, good on her for turning it around, getting herself a business etc. And maybe, just maybe, she has learned something from her tellings off about her behaviour in the house and has changed that when she has been given some insight as to how that behaviour is perceived by others

FM
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

 I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.   

Found this http://www.standard.co.uk/life...uctions-6414703.html and this http://www.independent.ie/woma...g-girl-26750972.html Very interesting reads

I'm reading it now, thanks Supes....I particularly like beneath the photo "Knickers ÂĢ5 from ASOS"

Ha, ha, I don't get that, I've got ads for paella pans 'cos that's what I've just been looking for!

FM
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

 I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.   

Found this http://www.standard.co.uk/life...uctions-6414703.html and this http://www.independent.ie/woma...g-girl-26750972.html Very interesting reads

I'm reading it now, thanks Supes....I particularly like beneath the photo "Knickers ÂĢ5 from ASOS"

Ha, ha, I don't get that, I've got ads for paella pans 'cos that's what I've just been looking for!

Isn't there a picture of Helen....its underneath it..".Helen wears....."

Amythist
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

 I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.   

Found this http://www.standard.co.uk/life...uctions-6414703.html and this http://www.independent.ie/woma...g-girl-26750972.html Very interesting reads

I'm reading it now, thanks Supes....I particularly like beneath the photo "Knickers ÂĢ5 from ASOS"

Ha, ha, I don't get that, I've got ads for paella pans 'cos that's what I've just been looking for!

Isn't there a picture of Helen....its underneath it..".Helen wears....."

 seen it now: Helen wears a top, from a selection, at Vintage Modes (020 7725 9601). knickers, ÂĢ5, from asos.com

FM
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Amythist:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

 I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.   

Found this http://www.standard.co.uk/life...uctions-6414703.html and this http://www.independent.ie/woma...g-girl-26750972.html Very interesting reads

I'm reading it now, thanks Supes....I particularly like beneath the photo "Knickers ÂĢ5 from ASOS"

Ha, ha, I don't get that, I've got ads for paella pans 'cos that's what I've just been looking for!

Isn't there a picture of Helen....its underneath it..".Helen wears....."

 seen it now: Helen wears a top, from a selection, at Vintage Modes (020 7725 9601). knickers, ÂĢ5, from asos.com

  

the article doesn't mention hairdressing and judging from her creations I'm not sure she has had any training

Amythist
Originally Posted by Supes:

I have absolutely no problem with prostitution, (or indeed sex outside of a loving relationship,) as long as it's a personal choice and doesn't involve abuse or coercion. That choice could be because of a myriad of reasons, including that one has switched off any 'sex equals love' button; out of sheer desperation due to financial difficulties; or because it is a 'career' choice, (perhaps a little unusual but not unheard of, I'm thinking of a number of people I'm aware of, including a woman in my village who has been offering a service to local farmers etc. from her own home for many years, apparently discreetly and without fuss.) It wouldn't include where 'pimps', 'madames' or gangs  are trafficking or otherwise exploiting or abusing the sex workers.

And therein lies the dilemma in the legalisation/ decriminalisation debate, on the one hand I think yes, on the other I would be concerned if that resulted in giving free reign to those who exploit and abuse. My other concern is that a high proportion of prostitutes have been sexually abused as children and what may appear to them to be a choice really isn’t at all, just a continuation of that abuse. On balance I think it should be decriminalized, but with strict safeguards and exit/support routes where necessary.

I do, on the other hand, have a problem when women, (and it does tend to be women, rarely men,) are called 'sluts' 'slags' etc. and often by those who actually engage in sex with them; those who take the moral high ground; those who are sexually repressed themselves; or simply those who are highly judgemental. I also have a problem with those who assume that, as in Helen’s case, ‘once a prostitute always a prostitute’ and that she is incapable of having any relationship without money changing hands. 

Couldn't agree more Supes.

jacksonb
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Supes:
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

 I'm becoming more intrigued by Helen every day and wonder what her story is.   

Found this http://www.standard.co.uk/life...uctions-6414703.html and this http://www.independent.ie/woma...g-girl-26750972.html Very interesting reads

Did you see this Kaffs?

I did supes.   I think it's interesting reading and perhaps she's not just some sad slapper that wanted an easy way to make money.   A lot of what's in those articles would seem very closely related with the situations you described earlier.    I think it's a bit sad that she doesn't blame her parents because she was a difficult child.   she was child... she should hardly be blaming herself?

Kaffs

Legalising prostitution don't you run the risk of it becoming a legitimate career option for single women and especially unemployed women? 

 

Let's face it there are a number of men who would certainly like a woman's place to be in the home or in the bed rather than competing with them for promotions in the workplace.

 

There's been several incidents of women being sent off to interviews at lap dance clubs and that's a bit beyond the pale as far as job centres are concerned.

 

The trend in recent years has been that women's place in the workplace has become less secure and with porn the promotion of adolescent and young women as sex objects is much more prevalent. 

 

Legalising prostitution may go some way to creating a male dominated Victorian hypocrite society by the back door, where women are considered virtuous wives or women of dubious virtue and increasingly sexualised, barred from promotions. 

 

I also have an issue with the state profiting from sex, albeit, the state profits from the manufacture of weapons that maim and kill innocent people.

Carnelian

The best benefit of legalisation must be removing people from dangerous curb crawling and into an establishment.

 

However this throws up 2 problems

 

1. Who would want it in to their home town - or next door

 

2. Some people use prostitutes for an illicit liaison and want it to be secretive/unseen and would never use a 'house'

Saint
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

I did supes.   I think it's interesting reading and perhaps she's not just some sad slapper that wanted an easy way to make money.   A lot of what's in those articles would seem very closely related with the situations you described earlier.    I think it's a bit sad that she doesn't blame her parents because she was a difficult child.   she was child... she should hardly be blaming herself?

I read something about her father knocking her over the Rooney matter and saying that he'd had nothing to do with her since she left home to live with her bf at 16. No she bloody didn't he put her in care. And what kind of a parent disowns their child at that age because they're going through a rebellious teenage phase? A crap one is what I think

FM
Originally Posted by Kaffs:

Carnelian -  that's the best reason I've seen so far for not legalising it.     Honestly didn't occur to me that it could well end up being on offer at the job centre!   

Indeed, would there come a time when a job centre adviser looks a woman up and down and says "Your best option is, and think you should consider it, the sex industry. It's not like it was in the old days, it's growing market with stringent health and safety standards and workplace protection, there are training courses available"?

Carnelian
Last edited by Carnelian

Add Reply

×
×
×
×
Link copied to your clipboard.
×
×