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This morning I saw this headline on a placard for the local newspaper:

CROCODILE CAUSED FATAL PLANE CRASH

Which must have made people wanting to know more, Visions of crocodiles leaping up come to mind. But the story was:
Gloucestershire Airport boss adds weight to crocodile Congo aircraft death claim
Pilot: Chris Wilson

EXPERTS say panic sparked by an escaped crocodile could have caused the plane crash that killed a Cheltenham pilot.

Chris Wilson, 39, died with 19 passengers when the jet he was co-piloting plunged to earth in the Democratic Republic of the Congo.

The only surviving passenger from the flight says the incident was caused when the deadly reptile clawed its way out of a sports bag and brought chaos to the tiny 19-seater plane.

The article doesn't say what the crocodile was doing in the sports bag in the first place.

 

 

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Court Reporter Catches Judge

Masturbating While Sitting On Bench

 

A Petition has been filed by the Attorney General of Oklahoma for the removal of Judge Donald Thompson, an elected District Judge in Creek County.

The Petition claims the Judge repeatedly used a penis pump to masturbate under his robe while presiding over trials. Lisa Foster, Judge Thompson's court reporter for 15 yrs., claims to have witnessed the judge masturbate a number of times.

Others, from detectives to jurors, claim to have heard swooshing noises coming from the bench.

 
 
Dame_Ann_Average
The one that sticks in my mind is a sports headline after Caledonian Thistle trounced Celtic, obviously its a play on supercalifragilisticexpealidocious

"SUPER CALLY GO BALLISTIC CELTIC ARE ATROCIOUS"

And I loved the story about the croc downing the plane, the poor creature survived the crash but was killed by a machete shortly after.
squiggle

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