Somewhere in Scotland
6 Miles From Shops
By Mountains and Water
Mom and Bev
"Och aye the noo!"
As no-one says around here. The chalets are run by the English and the hotels are run by the Yanks. But the shops are Scottish.
Just a few lines to let you know how things are. The weather is mild and showery. The chalet has all mod cons – everything you could want in your own home. On Sunday morning I went for a stroll – that was when I posted the card that you should have got by now. It was about 11 o’clock when I came across a signpost saying the start of the West Highland Way - a 12½-mile walk across Glencoe. I didn’t want to walk 12½ miles, but I thought I’d start and there’s bound to be somewhere I can get off near the chalets. After all, it was that direction. Off I set, upwards and onwards, thinking, "beautiful mountains, waterfalls, and look at those adorable lambs! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh!"
Four hours later, you’re thinking, "****ing mountains, and sheep shit everywhere. All this looks the same!" I couldn’t get off the West Highland Way and I was 7½ miles in – more than halfway. So I reluctantly carried on to Fort William, which was the end of the walk. By 5 o’clock I’d reached Fort William, where I had a cup of tea and a sandwich. I was really sore at this point. Feet, knees and crotch are all equally knackered. On reaching Fort William and being nourished, I set off home, thinking it was only six miles to the bridge and then 2 miles to the chalet. I’d just walked 12½ miles, so six would be a doddle. God, was I wrong! It turned out to be 14 miles to the bridge and then 4 miles to the chalets. It was pitch black when I got back about 11 o’clock. I was dead from the waist down. Still, you’ve got to laugh haven’t you? Apart from sore feet and a few blisters, I was ok. Monday was a quiet day to recuperate.
Tuesday, I decided I’d go to Loch Ness, which was about 70 miles away. I thought I’d drive this time. On driving up, I discover I’ve got a leak somewhere from the engine, so I’m having to fill up with water every time I stop. Well, there’s plenty of water here. It’s a bit chilly, but dry. It took about an hour to get there and I did the full tourist bit. Viewed the loch from several different places – didn’t see Nessie though. I stopped on the way back at St Augustus, which is the start of the loch, so I had a look round. Can’t hurt, can it? I don’t have much cash on me, ‘cause I’m using my Access. I have got about a fiver. They run cruises across the loch, so I went on it. They last about an hour. It’s a damn sight colder out on the water than it is on land. So now, I’m freezing my knackers off and still no monster. I’m beginning to think it’s a bit of a scam by the cunning Scots. On the drive back I drive up to Ben Nevis and take in the view. I decided to stay in the car, for obvious reasons. I passed something called the Commando Trail, which I had to laugh at. I mean, so far, I’ve done a 30-mile hike and been subjected to freezing temperatures, and I’m on holiday! Still, you have to cram as much in as possible. No pain, no gain.I’m going to make a conscious effort to slow down. The telly is as crap up here as it is down home.The people are friendly and once you get to them, the shops are ok. People round here think I’m John Wayne, because of the way I’m walking. My calves are still hurting. I’ll probably need a holiday to recover from this one. Hope your home is coming on, and if I survive the next few days, I’ll see you when I get back.
Yours,
Sherpa Ian (Inept Explorer)
6 Miles From Shops
By Mountains and Water
Mom and Bev
"Och aye the noo!"
As no-one says around here. The chalets are run by the English and the hotels are run by the Yanks. But the shops are Scottish.
Just a few lines to let you know how things are. The weather is mild and showery. The chalet has all mod cons – everything you could want in your own home. On Sunday morning I went for a stroll – that was when I posted the card that you should have got by now. It was about 11 o’clock when I came across a signpost saying the start of the West Highland Way - a 12½-mile walk across Glencoe. I didn’t want to walk 12½ miles, but I thought I’d start and there’s bound to be somewhere I can get off near the chalets. After all, it was that direction. Off I set, upwards and onwards, thinking, "beautiful mountains, waterfalls, and look at those adorable lambs! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh!"
Four hours later, you’re thinking, "****ing mountains, and sheep shit everywhere. All this looks the same!" I couldn’t get off the West Highland Way and I was 7½ miles in – more than halfway. So I reluctantly carried on to Fort William, which was the end of the walk. By 5 o’clock I’d reached Fort William, where I had a cup of tea and a sandwich. I was really sore at this point. Feet, knees and crotch are all equally knackered. On reaching Fort William and being nourished, I set off home, thinking it was only six miles to the bridge and then 2 miles to the chalet. I’d just walked 12½ miles, so six would be a doddle. God, was I wrong! It turned out to be 14 miles to the bridge and then 4 miles to the chalets. It was pitch black when I got back about 11 o’clock. I was dead from the waist down. Still, you’ve got to laugh haven’t you? Apart from sore feet and a few blisters, I was ok. Monday was a quiet day to recuperate.
Tuesday, I decided I’d go to Loch Ness, which was about 70 miles away. I thought I’d drive this time. On driving up, I discover I’ve got a leak somewhere from the engine, so I’m having to fill up with water every time I stop. Well, there’s plenty of water here. It’s a bit chilly, but dry. It took about an hour to get there and I did the full tourist bit. Viewed the loch from several different places – didn’t see Nessie though. I stopped on the way back at St Augustus, which is the start of the loch, so I had a look round. Can’t hurt, can it? I don’t have much cash on me, ‘cause I’m using my Access. I have got about a fiver. They run cruises across the loch, so I went on it. They last about an hour. It’s a damn sight colder out on the water than it is on land. So now, I’m freezing my knackers off and still no monster. I’m beginning to think it’s a bit of a scam by the cunning Scots. On the drive back I drive up to Ben Nevis and take in the view. I decided to stay in the car, for obvious reasons. I passed something called the Commando Trail, which I had to laugh at. I mean, so far, I’ve done a 30-mile hike and been subjected to freezing temperatures, and I’m on holiday! Still, you have to cram as much in as possible. No pain, no gain.I’m going to make a conscious effort to slow down. The telly is as crap up here as it is down home.The people are friendly and once you get to them, the shops are ok. People round here think I’m John Wayne, because of the way I’m walking. My calves are still hurting. I’ll probably need a holiday to recover from this one. Hope your home is coming on, and if I survive the next few days, I’ll see you when I get back.
Yours,
Sherpa Ian (Inept Explorer)
your brother sounds brilliant.
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