Annoca... you are coping. The unable to stop crying, the not knowing what to do with yourself... its normal. Its exactly how I was. The wishing not to wake up cos just to 'be' hurts too much - that too is a normal feeling.
But, you know you can't fulfil that desire... cos you'd hurt your boys and others that care about you. Also... you won't always feel this desperate, it is very very very gradual... but soon you will have the odd hour without tears running down your face.. then that will be two hours... then you'll find you only cry three or four times a day. etc.
There is no quick fix... but you don't have to go through this alone... there are loads of us here who are genuinely worried about you, have felt this pain, and there is usually someone here most of the time who will talk if you need to.
Bless you, bless Remy xxxx